57. Daughter of Conquerers

The Moon harem was a maze of marble dotted with war trophies and white bodies clothed in blue. Seff held onto Selene’s hand as if afraid to get lost—and to keep her walking in a straight line; if she let go, Seff would wander off in awe, her mouth gaping in wonder at the dark beauty of Castle Night.
“I have a perchance for marble,” Selene told her with a crooked smile, “if you haven’t picked up on that yet.”
Yes, they were quite surrounded by it. Seff felt like she was walking through an infinite box with the veins of blue, like water reflections. When she looked up, chandeliers of crystal sparked with tiny flames. The warm wax scent of the white candles mingled with the moonflowers. 
They turned around a corner, and Seff sucked in a breath.
The space was a strikingly similar rectangular grassy courtyard enclosed by hallways, but panels of blue glass were attached to the edges of the roofs; everything was shaded in evening hues despite noon only just passing.
There were pups and their parents playing in the grass, wolf and human forms alike, the area large enough to accommodate them all. Playful yips and growls, laughter, so many happy noises, nothing like anything the Sun pack could produce. 
Selene squeezed Seff’s hand, tugging her along down one of the hallways. A staircase led to the second floor where she opened a door at the corner. Inside was an intimate room with a smooth rowan wood floor, a queen-sized bed, a vanity desk and mirror, and a balcony railing with a garland of asphodel flowers spiraling across it. The view was the back of the compound—rolling green hills below a perfect blue sky.
Seff padded inside to take in each detail. She didn’t notice Selene slipping away to go to the desk. “I wanted to show you this before I say anything,” she said quietly. Seff joined her to see her lift a silver chain necklace with a crescent moon carved from white wood dangling from it. “I carved it myself.”
The Luna held it up; feeling the air suddenly heavy with gravity, Seff observed it resting in the palm of her hand. It sparked against her skin, startling them both. There was something familiar about it. But Seff could not have said how. “It’s beautiful.”
“Keep it.”
“W-what? No, I couldn’t…”
Selene closed Seff’s fingers around the moon. “A gift and a promise,” she said with a wistful smile. 
It was wrong to not accept a gift, especially from the Luna of the Moon pack. Seff nodded and twisted up her hair for Selene to tie it at the nape of her neck. Letting the white waves cascade back down, Seff’s fingertips sparked again when she touched the wood. But it was a welcome nip of pain. Something about it all made her smile wistful, too.
“Come,” Selene said, extending an arm toward the balcony. 
They padded over and Seff looked out over the scene that seemed more from a painting than reality. Each harem, each Alpha, had wonders to show her. Now, Selene’s promise to tell her about her past no doubt lacked such pretty things, but Seff wanted to explore it nonetheless. 
Seff braced her palms on the balcony railing and looked at Selene. “Storytime.”
She dipped her head. “As you wish. I was born ninety-five years ago,” Selene began. “My parents were both Alphas. They founded the Moon pack just a year before I was brought into this world. I was from a litter of three, but my sisters were not destined to live through a harsh winter.
“My mother and father were not known for their tact. They were known for their hunger for domination. For years they expanded their territory, spawning enemies left and right as they razed lands that belonged to other packs. As their bloody reputations spread, packs learned a valuable lesson: join or die.”
Selene tucked her long black hair behind her ear. Seff had the sudden urge to run her fingers through it but stifled it. This was not the time to distract or be distracted.
“One day they returned drenched in red from a conquest. But another pack’s remaining wolves ambushed our family manor.” Selene paused, dipping her head, hair falling forward to half-cover her face. Seff thought it odd for her to be so hesitant, even in the midst of her own history. “They aimed for me as revenge.”
*Ah*, Seff thought, struck.
“While being shitty parents, they still cared deeply for their only surviving pup.” Another pause, looking down at her folded hands resting on the balcony railing. “They jumped in front of me and told me to run. I was rebellious, but I knew which battles to pick and which to not. I ran, but I hid—and I saw the fight. It was the bloodiest thing I’d ever seen, even as the daughter of conquerers. But they were dead and they took the two that killed them. The silence after the final breath…it was deafening.”
Selene forged ahead then, hesitation gone. “I was lucky to have an aunt return from a simple day working at the nearby farm that no one seemed bothered enough to attack. She buried the bodies and took care of the manor and the few wolves who joined the beginnings of a great pack.
“We shared the same desire to grow such a thing—guided by the mind, not the instinct. Keeping our stronghold, we traveled infinite miles, going from pack to pack—or the remnants of them. Those who violently opposed…” Selene finally looked up at the untouched hills. “Were met with violence. Though I led with more than just bloodlust, the root of the Moon’s creation remained the same: join or die.”
She met Seff’s eyes, pinning her in place. “Good came of it. Families were started. When my aunt died in another attack and I turned twenty, I met my first lover. An Omega male named Olwen from the Winter pack. He was attracted to my lawlessness, as he had described it. I hated him at first—the Winter pack was the one that killed my parents. I felt a superficial love for him, after time, and with him I awakened…”
Selene was not bashful in finishing, “My obsession with sex. Before our first litter was born—not by my loins—I already sought out other partners. It was too easy. Not only did my bloody fame attract more members, but my supposed mysticism. 
“Being born from not just one Alphas but *two* was astonishingly rare. Word circulated that I was a gift from our merciful gods, a blessing to sire powerful litters from worthy Omegas. The fools believed I could pass on my immortality. 
“Werewolves traveled a thousand miles to find me as if I could grant that wish and more. Heats and ruts are insatiable. They needed to be satisfied, and who better to satisfy than an immortal Alpha?”
Seff had dropped her gaze from Selene’s and played gently with an asphodel flower petal. “It’s hard being an orphan, isn’t it?”
Reliving a ruthless life, Selene was solemn. Seff felt her eyes pleading to be met again, but she couldn't bring herself to. “You’d rather address my being regarded as a fertility goddess with multiple sexual partners more than ask that question.”
Seff bit down on her lip. “Both?” she admitted sheepishly.
The Luna chuckled. It was the sound that would only emerge from the lips of a goddess of night and moon. “Orphans know a loneliness that cannot be felt by all. They also feel a guilt that can only be understood one to another.”
The tender tone and gravity finally drew Seff’s eyes up. The blue of Selene’s was as deep as her memories. Seff could see herself in a small reflection, a sad little Magnolia worn to her wit’s end by reckless wolves haunted by greed and jealousy.
But when Seff stared down Selene’s emotions, indeed finding loneliness and guilt—and the regret of being the one to live while the ones you loved…didn’t. And the loneliness? It was just the heart searching to cure it. 
Selene rested her hand over Seff’s hesitantly, hopeful she wouldn’t pull away; she didn’t. This skinship was more intimate than any kind of sex. “Living forever is lonely.”
*It’s worth it if you can be with another wolf who feels the same, even if for a little while*, Kiran had said.
It was probably a stupid thing for Seff to blurt out softly, “Kiran says that he thinks that we…”
Selene went rigid. Her eyes went slitted like a cat’s. “He thinks what?” she said through gritted teeth.
*Damnit, Seff*, she cursed herself. No going back now. “He says he thinks we’re soulmates—*but*!” she pled hastily, holding fast to Selene’s hand. “But he didn’t tell me anything more than that, and I…”
Selene’s face was tight and her teeth grated together. Seff had a feeling that if she could, she would run straight to Kiran just to rip off something very dear to him.
As if hearing her thoughts, Selene snapped, “I’d rip out his vocal cords first.”
Seff never realized that she was often the rational one in most conversations, no matter the recipient. She held Selene’s hand in both of hers and said, “I don’t know if I believe him. How can I after all he’s told me? I don’t think he’s *lying* about this…but what makes him say that?”
Seff wouldn’t admit aloud to the *somethings* she was beginning to feel toward Kiran. The kissing, the pleading to knot with him, which she was not proud of in sinking so low—it all made her wonder if she was accepting the emotion he was, at first, trying to force upon her. He *wanted* Seff. Was she…starting to want him back?
But she was here with Selene, and the sky was finally embracing a rosy-pink evening, and all she could think of was comforting her because she was in pain.
And she knew that Kiran and Selene both knew something they refused to tell her. Was this the night she could coax the answer from the goddess of the night?
Whispering, she said, “But I want to know about yours first.”