Chapter 34

"It's just dinner," Maddie repeated to herself for the twentieth time. "That's all. No sex. We'll talk like adults. Forget about this morning. Whatever we had between us is gone. Over. Done."
So why, her little inner voice asked, did you use your best body wash in the shower? And shave not only your legs but your pussy? And rub scented lotion into every crack and crevice of your body? And why are you wearing that silky Christmas shirt with the neckline cut down to there instead of the turtleneck you first took out?
She'd done all that and more, brushing her thick taffy-colored hair until it shone like spun gold, carefully applying her makeup and finished off with the gold Christmas bell earrings Zach had given her the last Christmas they'd spent together.
Finally she'd lit the fire and set up the small table in front of it. Put bright red candles in the crystal holders, lighting them so the aroma of holly would fill the house. Arranged some of the decorations she hadn't yet put out as a sort of centerpiece. And put a CD of Christmas carols on the stereo.
Oh, she was such an idiot. Such a dummy. She felt once again as if some invisible hand of magic had turned her brain upside down and rattled her emotions. She didn't seem to be quite in control of her thoughts or actions. She had about talked herself into running back upstairs to yank her hair into a pony tail and pull on old jeans and a sweatshirt when she heard the knock on the back door.
She was surprised it even registered, as hard as her heart was pounding. She walked into the utility room on shaky legs and opened the door
Oh, God. He looked absolutely gorgeous. No fair!
The temperature had dropped again so he wore his shearling jacket over clean, pressed jeans and a crisp plaid cotton shirt. His black Stetson sat squarely on his head and one hand gripped a paper bag.
"Hi, Maddie."
He smiled and all rational thought flew from her mind. She wanted to drown herself in those warm brown eyes, wrap herself in his heavenly scent.
Somehow she made her mouth work. "Um, hi, Zach."
He grinned. "So, can I come in?"
"What?" She tore her eyes away from his face. "Oh, sure. Absolutely. Come right on in."
She opened the door wider so he could step inside.
He hung his hat on one of the pegs on the wall and his jacket on another and sniffed the air as his nose caught the mingled aromas of holly and roast beef.
"Mmm. Smells good in here." He smiled into her eyes. "But not as good as you darlin'." Then he handed her the bag. "I didn't know if you'd gotten any wine when you were in town and I remembered you really liked this."
She opened the bag and pulled out a bottle of her favorite brand of Chablis.
"I can't believe you remembered." She shook her head.
His warm hands gripped her shoulders and his breath fanned her face. "You'd be surprised what I remember, Maddie Mae. In fact, I don't think there's one damn thing I've forgotten."
His eyes widened just a fraction as he noticed the ornaments at her earlobes and he touched one of them with a fingernail. "You're wearing the earrings I gave you. Looks like you remember things too."
She nodded. "Yes." She couldn't think of what else to say.
"All these years and you still have them." His voice dropped. "You give me mixed signals, Maddie Mae Woodward. You still feel something for me. Don't try to deny it. Not after the way we made love this morning. Not if you're wearing my earrings."
"Oh, Zach," she cried. "I...I..."
She looked at him helplessly, as if her senses had left her completely.
His gaze raked her from head to toe and she felt her hardened nipples push at the flimsy material of her blouse. Her blood felt as if it has been replaced by molten lava and she knew if he touched the crotch of her jeans he'd find them damp. Lordy. She had no will power where this man was concerned.
"I-I'd better put this in to chill," she stammered and backed away from him.
But when she turned away from the refrigerator he was right there, a solid wall of man, the wonderful scent of him driving her crazy.
"We haven't said hello properly yet, Maddie."
Two fingers tipped up her chin and his mouth came down on hers, molding itself to her lips as if they were one shape. He took his time with it, rubbing his lips back and forth against hers, his teeth nibbling first at the lower lip, then at the upper, the tip of his tongue teasing at the corners. When he ran his tongue across the full seam of her lips she opened them on a sigh and welcomed him inside.
Oh, God, he tasted so good. Like mint and man. Like Zach. His hands slid down her back, drawing her body so close to him she could feel the thick ridge of his erection pressed against her. Her breasts, already aching for his touch, pushed into his chest. And still he did nothing except kiss the life out of her, turning her brain to mush.
If not for the fact they needed to breathe she wondered if the kiss would ever have ended. When Zach lifted his head his breathing was choppy, hers almost nonexistent.
"How abut we have a glass of wine before I tear off your clothes in the kitchen." His voice was low and heavy with desire.
"G-Good idea," she said. "I've got a different white already chilled."
Her hands shook as she took the bottle from the fridge and fumbled with the corkscrew. With a rough chuckle, Zach took the instrument from her and efficiently opened the wine, pulling the cork with a distinctive pop! Maddie held the goblets while he poured, Then he touched his glass lightly to hers.
"To the future, darlin'."
"Is there one?" she asked, her words no more than a faint breeze across the surface of the wine.
"I think that's what we're going to find out tonight." His eyes darkened. "Isn't it?"
"I guess we'll see." Her voice sounded as shaky as she felt. Where was all that determination she'd dredged up earlier in the day? She felt as if someone had shaken it out of her.
"Will dinner spoil if we sit by the fire for a while?" he asked.
"What? Maddie blinked her eyes. "Oh, no. I planned for us to have some time first. To talk," she said with emphasis.
One corner of his mouth kicked up in that teasing grin. "Whatever you say, darlin'. You're in charge."
Zach sprawled on one end of the long couch and when Maddie would have passed him to sit in the wing chair he caught her with one hand and tugged her toward him.
"Not so far away, okay?"
She nearly spilled her wine as he gently pulled her down next to him. Trying to put some defensive armor between them she moved a few inches away and curled her legs under her.
"I thought we were going to talk," she reminded him.
Zach sipped his wine, just watching her with that look that made every muscle in her body shiver with want.
"Were we?" he said at last.
"We have...a lot to talk about."
"Okay. We'll talk." He leaned forward took her wine glass and put it down on the floor with his. "But not yet. We haven't gotten to the talking stage yet."
"What do you mean?"
He pulled her toward him so she was lying full length against him. "I mean, you look far too good for me to just sit here and exchange words with you right now. God, Maddie. All I have to do is look at you and I want you." His hand slipped beneath the silky shirt and slid it up until her breasts in their flimsy bit of lace were exposed. "You have the most beautiful breasts, Maddie Mae. Plump and full, just made for holding in my hand."
He followed words with actions, cupping one aching mound and rasping his thumb across the nipple. He moved his hand and expertly flicked open the front catch.
"And your nipples. They're so sweet-looking they should be outlawed. Ripe and rosy, like fresh raspberries."
He leaned down and flicked the tip of his tongue across one of them, the wet heat sending spikes of pleasure jolting through her. When he just barely closed his teeth over the tip Maddie moaned. She couldn't help herself. God, she was such a pushover where this man was concerned. No willpower at all. All her good intentions just vaporized the moment he touched her. Even the morning's activity hadn't taken the edge off her need, a need she'd carried around with her for ten long years.