Chapter 19

AYRA




"What if I'm right though? What if he doesn't find me attractive?" I asked, running my hand through my hair in frustration. 




"Silly, he finds you attractive. Why would he have sex with you if he doesn't?" Reese asked, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.




"I agree with Reese," Nikki said. "I've seen the way he looks at you. That isn't the look of a man who isn't interested in you. He came to the club with you last night without putting up a fight. Would he do that if he didn't feel something?"




"Nikki is right. I haven't known Alpha Nathaniel for that long, but he usually never budges when he makes a decision. He said he wasn't going to go with you, and he ended up doing so. Let's not forget the mark on your neck."




Of course. The mark. The stupid thing that brought us together in the first place. I wondered how things would've turned out between us had he not marked me against my will.




"I could go on and on. He finds you attractive. Think about it this way - what if the insecurity is on his side, and not yours?" Nikki suggested. 




I never thought of it that way. What if he was the one with something to hide? Come to think of it, there was nothing imperfect about his body from his face to his muscular chest, his chiseled abs, and lastly, the monster between his legs.




What could a person like him be hiding?




"Don't beat yourself up over this. The last thing we want is for you to think you're undesirable when that's far from the truth. You might not be perfect, but then again, who is? Everyone has flaws."




"Thanks, girls. This was exactly what I needed to hear," I said, wrapping my arms around them. "I love you both."




"We love you, too," they chorused.




"Now that you're done doubting yourself, how about we talk about the party that is usually hosted in the packhouse. It's a huge event," Nikki said.




"What is the party all about?" No one mentioned anything about a party before.




"Considering the fact that you handle the responsibilities for the Blood Moon Festival, it's rather strange that you don't know about this," Reese said.




"I've been preparing for the two main events with inputs from Nathaniel and Kimberly here and there, but Kimberly said she'd handle the rest. Apparently, there's a lot of parties in anticipation for the festival."




"Not really. This is part of the Blood Moon Festival. I just thought you'd know because you're part of the planners and all. It's this pack's anniversary. Twenty-five years and still going strong," Reese said with a proud smile. "It's a fairly new pack, but it still holds power in the werewolf world."




"It must be a huge event."




"It is," Nikki pipped in. "Everyone dresses fancy, and we all have fun. New dresses are coming in today, and Kimberly informed me earlier. If we go now, we'll have an array of choices to pick from. The only thing we would have to worry about next is our shoes and jewelry. By the time the party rolls over next week, we would have everything well prepared."




"Sounds like a plan. Let's head out. The guys are still at the tryouts. I hope they get in," Reese said. She flashed me a grin "You could put in a good word for them. I'm just kidding. That wouldn't be fair."




"Enough about the guys. Let's go get some dresses."




That I could get on board with. Anything to keep my mind off Nathaniel. 




***




Next week came sooner than expected, and finally, it was the anniversary day. Every person I met on the island was just as elated as the next.




"You look stunning," Nathaniel said from my bedroom doorway.




I looked up from my shoe which was proving to be difficult to buckle. He exuded sex and power even from a distance, making my core tighten in response.




On a normal day, he was just as breathtaking in his usual slacks and black shirt, but the way the tux molded to every single muscle in his body had my mouth dropping open. He had traded his usual black stud with a diamond one that glinted when it caught the light.




"Careful there. I see you drooling," he said with a cocky smirk, dropping to his knees in front of me.




I snapped my thighs shut to mask the evidence of my arousal. 




"Don't worry, Ayra. I can smell your arousal just fine, and no, I won't force you to break your dry spell. I'm just getting the shoes for you."




"Oh."




"How are you going to walk with these all night?" He asked, his lips twitching as he buckled the shoes.




"When you have a group of friends hyping you up and calling you a bad bitch, let's see how much you can turn down." He snorted. "Of course, the first step would be to get some friends, and we both know you've got none. Your Enforcers don't count."




"Well shit, babe. I'm having mixed feelings about this dress," he said when I stood. "I'm torn between tearing this dress off of you, and having my wicked way with you, or locking you up so others don't get to see how beautiful you look."




"You'll be doing none. Lucky for me, I don't answer to you," I said, tucking a piece of my hair behind my ear.




I was dressed in a form-fitting, red sequin dress that dipped low in the back with two crisscrossing straps across my bare back. There was a slit up my left thigh, exposing the red heels I had on.




"I'm your Alpha."




"I'm not yet officially a member of the pack unless you say so. The last time I checked, you haven't said so. You never got to me about the monthly spending limit thing. When I went to get this dress, they gave it to me for free."




"There's a system in place that changes when there's an addition. It cuts down on some places to make space for the new person."




"That means others have their income cut down after the new arrival."




"Yes. That way, there's no overspending. The numbers were tweaked shortly before you arrived. There's not enough time to detect if the new arrangement works, hence the reason you don't have a limit currently. Shall we?"




I slipped my hand in his. "We shall."




***




"Ayra. This dress doesn't look like it's your actual size. Maybe if you had some curves, you'd fill the dress out well," Sandra said with a smile that was anything but sweet.




I opened my mouth to tell her off, but she burst into laughter, snagging two drinks from a tray as a waiter passed by. She handed one to me before taking a sip out of hers.




"I was just kidding. You look stunning. I came here to apologize. We started off on the wrong foot, and I'd like to correct that."




I plastered on a fake smile to mirror hers. "I don't see the need. We haven't had much of an altercation. Since we're not friends, we can go on blissfully ignoring every other."




"Oh, Ayra. You're so funny." Her eyes locked with something over my shoulder before she looked at me again, the smile off her lips.




I would have looked behind me, but I didn't trust her not to dump her drink on my head, so facing her it was.




"I understand that Nathaniel has moved on. I should move on, too. If you're the one who makes him happy, then so be it. Just don't hurt him." 




Her eyes shone with so much sincerity that I didn't have any reason to doubt her. She seemed to care about Nathaniel.




She didn't wait for my reply before she spun on her heels and strutted off. I understood why when I felt Nathaniel's hand on my waist a moment later.




"What did Sandra want?" He asked, plucking the champagne flute from my hand.




"She came to extend an olive branch. She looks like she genuinely cares about you. Makes me wonder why you left her in the first case," I replied looking up at his face.




*It makes me wonder when you'll leave me.*




I didn't say the words to him though, staring deep into his gold-flecked green eyes.




"Same here," he replied. From the way he answered, I knew he'd somehow heard my unasked question. 




"Hm. Enjoy the party."




I slipped away from his hold, his gaze boring into my back until I finally disappeared into the crowd.