20.2

His words lingered between them like smoke, dense with meaning. Nuri’s breath caught in her throat, unsure if she was ready for the truth… or the weight it might carry.
Kalmin gave a single sharp nod, then pulled out his phone and dialed. “Cameron, I’m sorry for the short notice, but Nuri won’t be starting with you until tomorrow.” He ended the call and turned to her. “Let’s go.”
“Where?” Nuri asked, grabbing her coat and hurrying after him. He didn’t answer, just walked straight through the house and out the back door. “Kalmin!” she called, jogging to keep up. He didn’t slow down.
“I’m giving you what you want,” he said abruptly, stopping at the riverbank. He dropped to the ground, patting the spot in front of him. “Sit.”
“I thought you said I needed to be more educated before we tried this—” Her words caught in her throat as Kalmin grabbed her wrist and pulled her down.
“I also said I’m tired of trying to figure you out. If this is what you need to make a decision, then I’ll give it to you.” His tone was clipped, but his eyes—his eyes were aching. “Do you have any idea what it’s like having your soul threaten to kill you and your mate if you don’t accept her? A mate who can’t decide if she wants you either?” His jaw clenched. “You and Rian are playing tug-of-war, and I’m the rope. I’m done.”
“Rian did that? I didn’t know.”
“Of course you didn’t. I never told you. Tempest and Rian are perfectly content. They’ve already decided when they’re going to consummate their relationship.” His laugh was bitter. “But me? I’m just stuck watching my soul claim his mate, and I don’t even know if I get to do the same.”
‘The mate who you hate.’ Nuri kept the thought to herself, unsure where to even begin. Was that what he’d kept from her the night before?
“Okay. What do I have to do?”
“The impossible,” Kalmin said, holding his hands out. “You have to trust me.”
“I meant—what do I have to do to merge with you? I didn’t make it far enough to learn that part. I only know it’s different from a meld.”
“Is Tempest still asleep?” he asked.
Nuri nodded.
“Good. So is Rian. That’ll help. Just keep your emotions in check—too much, and you’ll wake them up.”
“Why would my emotions—”
He kissed her.
Her breath caught as her hands instinctively flew to his chest, but before she could shove him away, he caught them and wrapped her arms around his waist.
“Don’t fight me,” he whispered, pressing his forehead to hers. “Just breathe with me. Close your eyes. Focus on me. My heartbeat, the taste of my lips, and the way I smell. Whatever grounds you, hold onto that. Let your guard down. Let me in.”
Her heart pounded like it was trying to burst through her chest, but she listened. She let her eyes fall shut, leaned into him, and drew in the scent of damp earth and pine—the way the forest smelled after a storm. At first, all she could think about was they’re kissing, but the thought faded as Kalmin’s voice echoed in her mind.
‘Can you hear me?’ His thoughts brushed against hers, low and smooth like velvet.
She startled.
‘Good. This is the first step. Keep letting your walls down. I’ll be able to show you more than just thoughts.’
He shifted, laying her down gently on the grass, then stretched out beside her, one arm wrapped around her as he pulled her close.
‘Don’t think about anything else but me.’
His hand slid into her hair, fingers tangling at the nape of her neck. ‘Don’t think. Just feel.’
‘As if I could think about anything else right now…’ Her cheeks burned as the thought slipped out, and she remembered—he could hear everything.
She wanted to pull away. Every nerve screamed to run. But she stayed. She forced herself to stay, to feel. She kissed him back, tasting faint traces of coffee on his lips, and let that flavor ground her in the moment.
This time, the connection came stronger—hotter. She didn’t just hear him. She felt him. His frustration. His ache. His desire. And then the memories hit.
It started with their meeting—just as he’d said. She’d tripped over nothing, he caught her, and that’s when Rian had recognized Tempest.
Kalmin didn’t hold anything back. He showed her everything. The hunt. The contempt. The resentment. The gut-deep hatred every time he looked at her and remembered what she was. Even the conversation with Tempest the night before. The only thing he didn’t show her was what he’d done to Gael.
‘Don’t break the connection too fast,’ Kalmin said in her head as he felt her pulling away. ‘Reverse the way you let me in. Slowly. Let yourself back out.’
When she finally let go, her vision was hazy and her thoughts were foggy. She stared into the distance, mind overloaded.
“Put your face in the river,” Kalmin said. “It’ll help.”
Without question, Nuri leaned forward and plunged in—completely. The shock of the cold snapped her out of it instantly. She gasped, shaking as she pulled back.
Kalmin lunged. “I said your face, Nuri!” He grabbed her arm, hauling her back onto the riverbank. “Do you at least feel better now?”
“So much better,” she muttered, flopping onto the grass and staring up at the clouds. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but… that was it?”
Kalmin’s brow pinched. “What do you mean?”
“I thought it’d be worse. I kept expecting some world-shattering reveal. But it was just… mutual ignorance. Mutual prejudice. We hated each other because we were taught to.”
Kalmin let out a quiet laugh and lay beside her. “I guess when you put it like that, none of it really warranted the level of hatred we gave each other.”
“It makes this easier,” she said, turning on her elbow to face him. “You showed me that I’m guilty of the same thing we’re trying to change. We can’t expect to lead a shift in this pack if we can’t even fix it between us.”
“How is it that we don’t have a choice?” he asked, meeting her gaze. ‘How can I still feel so much disgust… and still want you so badly it hurts?’
“We’re both invested,” she said quietly. “You want to be the alpha who changed the pack for good. I don’t care about stories or legacy. But we both want the same thing. And the ultimatum Rian gave you… it only ends two ways. We either learn to live with each other… or one of us dies. And we both lose our souls.”
She stood and peeled off her soaked shirt, wringing it out over the grass. “You can act like losing Rian wouldn’t break you. But I saw. I felt it. Don’t lie—especially not to yourself. We’re in this together now.”
Kalmin rose, bitter and tired, and turned toward the house with a grunt. He’d shown her everything—every memory, every feeling, every crack in his pride—and she still spoke like they were co-workers.
“I didn’t mean it that way!” Nuri called, chasing after him. “I just meant… I’m done letting the past, and other people’s hate, dictate how I treat you. We have to move forward. We can’t keep living in the shadow of something we didn’t even create.”
She reached for his hand and stopped him. “I saw that memory,” she whispered. “The one where you said the only way I could get you to trust me… was to kiss you.”
She stepped into him, pulling his arms around her— gazing up at him with a nervous smile. She hesitated only for a second before bringing her lips crashing into his.