Chapter 44

Brownson pulled the curtains over the cold wind that was slowly swirling into the room, he left the window side and downed the remaining glass of bourbon on the bedside table. The guest room wasn't glad as large as his room but it was spacious enough that he could pace about just like he did that evening. The bed was a queen sized bed and the floor was a flush cream rug. The twin bedside lamp were on despite the still bright evening, so was the chandelier overhead and he looked distractedly at the crystal lights for a couple of minutes, transfixed and his mind wandering. When would all this be over? He asked himself and then heaved a sigh as if he knew it was pointless to ask. This was a carousel of disappointment and bullshit and something told him the police couldn't help him at all. He poured another glass and downed it with a wince.
Martha sat on the foot of the stairs leading to the huge living room, dressed in a sequined red dress, her hair neatly pulled into a chignon, her face dabbed with just the right amount of powder and her lips painted a faint crimson, her cheeks had the artificial blush and her eyes were lined underneath with an eyeliner, she looked presentable, like she was headed somewhere but her feet were bare and it was obvious she was actually doing no where.
It wasn't an odd thing to find Mrs. Brownson dressed up at her home with no intentions to step out, no, it was actually what she loved doing, considering at any moment a business associate, a another Senator's wife or any such equally important person could walk into the house and she was needed to play hostess to the prominent guest. She loved wearing her makeup and looking pretty from when she woke up until she was ready to sleep. Her no doubt wrinkled face and paper complexion always shone better and looked much younger with the right amount of concealer and foundation that was worth a plot of land in a remote community.
It was however odd to find her dressed up after the incident with Brownson Jnr. Considering she had barely even feeding well or sleeping well either, an attempt to look good was something the servants were weary about since they met her at the foot of the stairs that day. Most of them avoided the living room entirely and with good reason and those who couldn't avoid the living room actually pretended not to see her seated there, they simply walked many feet from her and went their way, almost tiptoeing around her.
Just the previous night, she'd seen a lipstick stain on Brownson's expensive two-pieces suit, he had smelled lightly of alcohol too. She didn't have the energy in her to nag or ask him what exactly a lipstick stain was doing on his cream coloured suit, she'd simply sat there and watched as he had dinner and tried as much as he could yo coax even a single word from her. Needless to say that his antics did not work, she wasn't eager the laugh, or even smile or as much as day anything to anyone, she wanted her son and that she was sure was the only thing worth any word from her.
She didn't blame him though, no, she didn't blame her cheating husband, men cheated and she knew it, she wasn't a child, hell, she was closer to her grave than she wanted to admit and she had been with a long line of men and married quite a few in her lifetime, she was at peace with their cheating nature, and even as Brownson cheated, she could not bring herself to label him a cheat. No, he wasn't and she knew it. Through their years together, she could count with her fingers how many times he'd been with another woman and it was just a handful. All the time fell between the period Brownson went missing and she fell into the deep pit of self-pity and grieve she was desperately trying to swim out of and at the same time not so eager to leave, because she knew that leaving this bubble of insanity meant admitting it was all real and her precious child was actually gone for good, she wasn't ready to admit that.
Martha felt a sense of pride that he had the drink before bedding other women and he was trying his damnest the hide it from her. Well, she wasn't ready to be normal again and until Brownson Jnr was in her arms - alive or dead - then sex was the least thing on her old mind.
She closed her eyes and heaved a tired sigh, she didn't quite know what possessed her that morning but she'd woken up and took one good look at her reflection in the mirror, she'd winced and called in her maid to help her looks. Well, if she had the be honest, she would admit it had something that do with Brownson's cheating the past few weeks, perhaps if she didn't look such a wreck then he'd look at her with the fire and lust that he always did and not the new gaze of pity and sadness that was customary since the incident.
She was not being fair and she knew it, Brownson was his child too and he too was no doubt grieving but in her defense, life wasn't fair and it wasn't him that went through three trimesters of carrying the boy and then had his tummy sliced open to bring him out because she was too old and worn out to really push the baby out naturally. Well, life wasn't fair and she didn't want to be fair, she simply wanted her som back with her and her life back to normal, she was tired of the look the household staff were giving her and the consolations that wouldn't stop coming in, she was sick of it all and as she sat there, caught in her won thought, she wished it all didn't have to happen to her. Why her?
She stood before the large wall mirror, her eyes casted down on her frame, her belly round and her hips padded with a revolver on the left and a Glock handgun on the right. It was six days after the incident at the garage and Valeria had never felt such strong emotions since she lost Lily over two fifteen years ago. The room she was standing was a beautiful hotel in Washington DC, the one she'd chosen the lodge when she arrived the previous night, as a guest pianist for the evening.
She inhaled deeply and exhaled as she stood before the mirror, looking at herself and indeed her life and what it had be one. Tonight was the night it could all either be over for good or end her in jail, both she was prepared for somehow and she knew she'd embrace either fate without much of a fight. She turned her face to Moses on the bed, he was dressed in a white overall and white socks, his wounds had healed nicely and he only bore the scars to remember them by. No doubt, he wouldn't even remember her or anything that had happened since he was taken from home.
Valeria dabbed at her bottom lid with a paper towel, not allowing the tears to ruin her makeup. She had her face looking a few years younger, healthier and much prettier than she actually felt. And she didn't feel pretty at all, she actually felt ugly. Like her life was a curse that had crept up upon everyone she knew and was slowly sucking them into it's ugly abyss of death. It didn't help that her belly had her fake silicone bump, this time a little larger and rounder than its usual size, he gown fit snugly on her and her hips held her guns tightly.
The guns weren't for herself, she had told herself as she strapped them there. They were for Moses just incase he needed protection from whosoever tried to harm him. Her mind was made up and she knew she was ready to lay down her life for the child. That in some way scared her, made her afraid and yet I some strange and sick way calmed her as well, like nature had given her a second chance to make it right, it make it all alright and make up for what she had caused in the past.
She looked up at her own reflection and exhaled, squared her shoulders and smacked her red painted lips out of habit. Ironically, it was her birthday and once again, she was clothed like someone else and wearing the ID of a dead woman on her. Sometimes, she felt that the more she impersonated dead people, the more a little bit of her did die and slowly she had nothing to live for anymore.
It was six whole days after Nick and Pete died in that very garage, in a pool of their own blood, her brothers and friends. It was finally the day of the conference in Washington DC, Capitol Hill. There was no Pete, no Nick, just her and a year old boy she had given up all her life to save. Did she regret it? Maybe a little but she was sure she didn't wish for anything else for the baby. Moses was in good health and for her that meant the world.
With a finger, she touched her lips from her reflection on the mirror and smiled, a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. It was the very day she was born and each year, she drowned herself in alcohol and groupies and slept the night away. Or it was a job and she just remembered while at the job that it was her 07 October and her very own birthday and most times she had to pause whatever she was doing and give a silent prayer to her mother.
She could remember her six year old self, clothed in a similar red gown and looking at the broken mirror in the small basement they lived in Ireland. It was a small place they'd moved into shortly after her father never returned from work one day and they were sent out of the apartment weeks after that.
The basement was below a funeral home and most times they could hear cries and arguments as relatives came to finalize the resting place of their loved ones, it was ironic that when her mother died, that very funeral home hadn't planned her funeral despite the owner being a lover and friend of her mother.
Nina Smith, Valeria's mother was a willowy woman, appearing most times too old for her age. She was a thin woman with a mean face and a kind heart. Having grown up in a Catholic home, Nina was a staunch Catholic and a devot member of the local church.  When she wasn't in the church on Thursdays and Sundays, she was working at the textile shop not far from home and feeding them with whatever she had.
Valeria did grow up with the silk and bonnet and all that nonsense that girls at the age of five made a fuss about. She knew fancy tea parties and dolls and frilly things but it wasn't for long. Even as Valeria stood staring at the mirror, she couldn't still fathom what had happened between her parent. Was it I fidelity? She didn't know what to think, her mother was too meek, too submissive, too religious to be unfaithful to her husband, she literally worshiped the ground he worked on. To her, it was her husband and then God.
So you see, it was hard for her to know whatever transpired between the two that was so irreparable and unforgivable. The change though was rather sudden and in a twinkle, her father stopped kissing her goodnight, didn't ask her how her days went, didn't attend her home lessons anymore. Valeria had been homeschooled and she didn't attend the conventional preschool where girls kissed boys and lost their virginity, no, she was holed somewhere with a boring lesson teacher.
At first, her father had made it a duty to check on her during her classes and made it easy and almost simple to learn. But then, the sudden change had started and he wasn't interested in her classes, he still bought her dresses but never complimented her when she wore them. He ceased joining them for dinner and later stopped having breakfast too. It spiralled down to him living like a ghost in the house, simply dressing for work and returning without any contact or communication at all. It made Nina miserable and slowly she top ghosted Valeria, too absorbed in her own pain and sadness to notice that her little girl too has hurting from missing her father.
At a point, Valeria had lost both parents even before they passed. Could she blame them? No, they had their own demons and although she did blame them when she was younger, as she grew older, on learnt that people had to do what they had to do and sometimes they didn't really intend to hurt someone by doing these things, you could simply he a casualty and you didn't need to hate them for it, it wasn't their fault they couldn't be there for you, they had lost their battle against will and if you did look at it closely, it wasn't about you at all, you just got caught in the cross fire of it all.
Valeria learnt to forgive her parents when she was fifteen years and by then they had both passed, or at least her mother had and her father was still missing. It had been one cold morning when she woke up and didn't find her father home, scrubbing his shoes or knotting his tie for work. He didn't sleep in late and he was a early bird, even to her  six year old mind, she knew something was amiss and she had cried that morning. Well, Nina had made it look like she knew he wouldn't be home and had cooked some excuse for his absence, she couldn't recall what lies she told first but she could remember she heard a long train of lies before they finally had to move out of the house after being served an eviction notice.
The auditing firm he worked in didn't know where he was, no one knew where he'd gone, his family was just his older drunk brother who by just looking at him, you would know he had no care in the world but his whiskey bottle and his women. Well, Nina had dragged her to his home to ask about her father and the drunk mad had given the very reply they had expected from him even as they entered a cab to his door, "No" he and said with a mere shrug and sent them out on their way. Valeria could still remember the discussion she had with her mother on the porch of her estranged uncle's house.
"Valeria, I need you to be strong" she'd said.
"I am strong mummy, see?" She had joked, flexing her tiny triceps.
Nina had given her a tight smile that was fake even to a child and the she'd shaken her head.
"I need you to be very strong, inside of you" she said.
Valeria had become slightly sober and nodded her head.
"Mummy will have to do some thing, just watch me, follow me and do as I say from now okay?" She'd asked, her eyes stern and at the same time soft, communicating the severity of their situation.
Valeria had nodded and cried instantly, somehow she knew life wouldn't be the same again and she was right.
After that day in the porch, they slept on the train for a full week, hidden behind the cabin next to the engine, they were helped by a fat man who had a bad breathe and ate too much. When the train drove, they would simply seat on the many seats as passengers just to escape the heat of the cabin. But some days, when the tickets were all sold out and they couldn't fit anywhere without drawing attention, they remained holed up in the engine room and endured the heat, counting seconds to when it would be all over. As she recalled, that was where she got her first tan and discovered that she didn't like the pale white complexion so much. She liked the darker skin and childishly hoped she can stay longer in the engine room, hopefully, she'd turn into an African American and probably grow their afro hair too, it had always been something she admired.
From the train, they'd moved to a shabby apartment above a funeral home and the stayed there the longest. Her mother began working at the textile shop and at least, Valeria could say she didn't go hungry. She was sometimes happy that she was alone with her mother. As sadistic as that joy was, considering she wasn't born alone, it hadn't always been just her, she'd grown up with two brothers and a baby sister but she'd lost all of them in one tragic year. Two during one winter to a mere flu and the remaining one at a freak accident in school. Valeria guessed that had made her parents homeschool her.
Not being one for pity and charity, the moment her mother ceased breathing, she'd taken her to the priest and as a devot member, she'd been given a burial. Valeria had begun her own journey, through pain and sweat and blood, Mama Peng and the other girls at the whore house that pretended not to be a whore house and then her life as the lone wolf, tigress, seductress, thief, fraudster, con artist and then for the past ten years a member of a gang. A gang that was now a one man gang.
As much as she didn't believe in all the ill and fortune telling bullshit, she could remember once while on a job, a certain man with a fetish had taken her to dress her up in beads and coloured powders and charm bracelets, they'd ventured into a fortune telling shop for one of those things and the old overdressed lady had clutched Valeria's hand in one of the tightest grips she'd ever felt from a lady, she'd looked her right in the eyes and then whispered to her.
"You have a lonely and long journey girl, a lonely and long one" she'd said and then with a pitiful look had rubbed her check with her calloused hands. Valeria had simply smiled and told her to try her gig elsewhere, a gig, she'd assumed she too was a con artist. But now, before that mirror, she reflected on her very long and lonely life and all those she'd lost. Her siblings, her father, her mother, Lily, Nick and Pete. All gone and once again she was absolutely alone in live, right where she started more than two decades ago.
Valeria wiped the single tear that had fallen off her face again and then touched her cheek with powder, coated her red lips again and looked to Moses on the floor, he was standing upright and holding on to the bedframe for support. He was now a toddler, having taken his first step and now eager to explore the whole house and go places. Valeria could imagine the joy her mother when she would hold him, she could imagine if by some twist of fate she should hold Lily again, she'd be ecstatic.
She'd grown the figurative balls to call Martha two days ago and the conversation had been one of the hardest she'd had in her life.
"I need you to move away from whoever you're with and be alone" she'd begun and the woman no doubt obeyed as she heard shuffling and mumbling before she spoke.
"I'm all on my own" she replied.
"I have Brownson Jnr" she stated.
"What do you want again?" She'd asked, her tone almost resigned, like she was tired of the whole saga.
"I need you to do just as I say" she'd said.
"That is exactly what we've been doing since you abducted my son, obey you, and we have, still, you boil him! You want to kill him? Why are letting an innocent boy suffer? What did we ever do to you? Is this one political vendetta? Why put my son in this? Take me instead, please" she broke down on the phone, sobbing loudly.
"I am no saint but I can tell you I didn't hurt a hair on your son's head" Valeria replied
"who did? You just said you have him! Is this another ransom? I will give you all I have, I just want my son back" she plead.
"I will give your son back, that is why I'm calling" she'd replied.
"Okay, what do I do? Where? I swear I won't take anyone with me, I swear, I'll not make tht mistake again, please, how much is it? I jus..."
"I want nothing, Martha. I just to be sure Moses is safely with you"
"Who's Moses?"
"Your son, I want him safe, I heard some police are trying to sell him to some Senators or politicians, I can't trust anyone at the moment"
"Who are you?" Martha asked.
"No one of consequence, I just need you to do as I say and your son will be safe with you by the evening of today"
"Okay, please, what do I do?" She asked.
"There's a conference in Capitol Hill today, it starts by noon and I'm guessing you're getting ready for it as we speak"
"Yes, that's true. I am, how do you know this? Who are you?"
"Those questions are irrelevant and if you do want your son I suggest you quit asking them"
"I'm sorry, please... I'm sorry, won't happen again...please" she begged.
"There's a dinner after the conference at 7:00pm prompt"
"Yes, there is"
"A lady will come, she's heavily pregnant, red dress, brown hair, she's a pianist and she'll be playing for the night. I need you to let her in, grant her access and let her bypass security, if she gets caught in the building, you can kiss your son goodbye, I can assure you no harm will come to him and he'll live but you'll never see him again"
"No...please...I want my son back...I'll...I'll let her in...woman in a black dress right?"
"Red dress Martha, it's mistake like that that's gonna cost you your life with your son"
"I'm sorry, my bad, red dress, yes, red dress, pregnant, a pianist, I got it, I will make sure she's in, what's her name?"
"Your phone will ring once she's at the entrance, go take her and give her a seat by the door of the room. You'll receive instructions after that"
"Okay, please what should..."
"I think I made myself clear lady. Wait for a call and instructions"
"Okay, thank you, should I come with a case? A..."
"Come with nothing" Valeria replied. "And your son, he's walking now"
"What? Oh my god! Oh my god! Please how do...."
Valeria ended the call, her own tears had flowed and she didn't want Martha thinking she was a pussy.
Valeria took her of Arabic scent and sprayed on herself, took her purse and took Moses, she exited the hotel room.
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