Chapter-39

Shraddha Kumar Malhotra

I went downstairs with Shree. Shree was teasing me with Aaron's name. I wished everyone Good morning. I reheated breakfast and organised it on the dining table. I was feeling backache and abdominal pain from the morning. I feel that I know the reason for this pain.

It's my period cramps and pain. The pain is unbearable for me. I sat beside mom and told her about it. She said that she will not send me to the office in this condition.

"Aaru Shraddha won't come to office today." Mom declared making smile broke on my face.

Aaru nodded his head positively.

I loved the way my husband obeys every order of mother in law like small kid.

I ate very little and went to rest as the pain was so unbearable. I was resting, closing my eyes when I heard the sound of a doorknob. My husband came into our bedroom and sat in front of me on the bed.

"Are you okay? What happened to you?" He asked  worriedly looking at my painful face. 

"No, nothing much. Just backache." I said in a not so interested tone. I was in no mood to answer.

"Should I take you to the doctor?" he asked again.

"No," I shouted. My mood swings were totally crazy during these days. I easily get irritated with small things.

"Why?" he asked with a frown.

"I usually face this always. It kind of gets intense in the starting but then it's ok." I said trying to avoid telling him about such intimate detail.

"If you always face this pain, then we have to definitely consult a doctor soon. I'll take today's appointment with the best doctor." He said and was going to call someone.

"You Monkey monster, I'm on my monthly periods. You idiot." I yelled at him. I was getting frustrated  with his constant questions and yelled at him.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry." He said smiling shyly making me frown.  

Why the heck he is not angry at me and why the heck he smiling like fool?

"Are you not going to get angry at me?" I asked emotionally.

"Angry but why?" He asked confusedly.

"Usually men don't like all these things. They feel disgusted by it." I said in a low voice. "Why would I get angry at you? It's not your fault. Its natural for everyone. It is faced by every girl. It's god's gift which is given to girls only. I have seen Shree in pain. I know how Shree face those days. I tried to keep her happy, I gave her all her comfort food. Riya becomes very calm and emotional in those days. She cries for small mistakes and shouts on us. She becomes like a small child. I'm worried about you. How about we consult a doctor regarding your pain?" He said making me smile because he is so much caring towards me even after i shouted at him.

'I must have done something good in my past life that's why God has gifted you to me in this life. I'm happy to be your wife Aaron.' I thought inwardly.

"There is no need for it," I said.

"Moreover you have an important meeting with the team in AR Dance academy for an upcoming concert." I reminded him.

"I'll postpone it, for now, we should consult a doctor for your pain," he said.

"I told you na that it's nothing. It's normal pain which almost every girl faces. Now please go to the office and don't forget to attend your meeting in AR." I said firmly. I was hiding my disappointment from him.

"Ok. Ok. I'll attend the meeting. If you need anything, call me. Take care of yourself." He said and kissed my forehead.

He left for the office and I slept for some time. After a few hours, I woke up due to abdominal pain. I went to freshen up. After getting ready I realised that I don't have sanitary pads with me. I was searching for it in the whole bathroom but there was none.

I thought of calling RI or Shree but they both will be busy in their own work. I didn't want to disturb them. Mom was also not present at home and I was not in a condition to go outside anywhere.

I forgot my bag in the car yesterday. The same car was taken by Aaron to AR so I didn't want to disturb him so I looked for some cash in my luggage but there was no cash available.

I received a call from Aaru so I asked him about it. He told me to take some cash from his wardrobe.

"Ok, thank you. I will return you the money once I get my back." I said hurriedly and ended the call. I started searching for it. I found a few notes of cash so I took out a few notes from that drawer.

When I was getting money from the drawer something fell on the ground. I bent down and picked up the book from the ground. I saw that it was a diary. I opened the diary. On the first page, it was written that it solely belongs to Aaron Malhotra. Whoever reads this diary without its owner's permission will face severe consequences...

I kept the diary on the bed and gave money to the maid. I told her to bring me 2-3 packets of sanitary pads.

I took a seat on the bed and was continuously looking at the diary. I was confused about whether I should read it or not. Its bad manners to read someone else's diary. It is an invasion of privacy. But then he is not someone else but my own husband.

After a lot of thinking I opened the diary and was shocked to see the text written on the second page of the diary.

There was 'love, Radha with hearts' were written beautifully. Then I turned the page to get a shock of the day. The lyrics of the song were written beautifully. Tears brimmed in my eyes. A big smile formed on my lips. It was the lyrics of my first song Radha sang. The same song by which Radha entered this industry. The same song was written and sung by Radha. The same song which I wrote for the first time and which came into the market also.

I turned to the next page. There was an entry of two years back. He wrote how he listened to this song accidentally on the radio. How he felt peaceful by listening to the song.

After that, there were many more entries such as he sent a few gifts to Radha. How he gradually fell in love with her songs. How he appointed P.I. to get more details about her. How he was sad when he did not get any clue about her whereabouts.

Then there were recent entries like one month back before our wedding.

"My heart only belongs to you Radha. My every heartbeat has your name only. You are my world. I don't know how you look. I don't care about your look but I care about your inner beauty. Your precious heart. I didn't even realise how you entered into my world and then became my whole world. It has been my wish to perform the dance with you singing beside me. I have been searching for you for the past year and a half. And  I'm not going to stop searching.

I want to listen to the way you sing the songs. I rarely perform on the other songs because whenever I play your music, it feels that you are with me. You are supporting me.

I want you to be a part of my world. There has not been a single day when I don't remember you. Every day, every second every minute I think of only you. I want to listen to your singing in front of me.

I'm looking forward to that day when I'll meet you and you will sing a song for me."

After reading this entry, tears brimmed in my eyes. I couldn't control my emotions and tears started flowing from my eyes. He loves Radha. He loves Radha, which is me. He indirectly loves me. The sincerity of his feelings towards Radha touched my hearts.

On the next page, there was an entry of the two days before we got married.

"Hello, my dear Radha. I am missing you so much today. I don't know why I feel like I am drifting away from you. Nowadays, I don't miss you like before.

Two days back mom talked to me about my marriage. She asked me whether I love someone or not. I couldn't answer her. She was excited about my marriage.

They have arranged an alliance for me. They want me to marry her. They are not forcing me. My parents, my family has always been my priority. I don't want to break their hopes and hearts.

I don't want to disappoint them so I agreed to their decision. After two days, I'll be getting married to her. All these days I was mustering the courage to write my feelings in this diary.

I am killing myself by agreeing to this marriage.

I know I have given my heart to you. I know this is not going to be easy but I will try my best to find happiness in the marriage.

In the future, if we meet I will confess my feelings to you but I won't be with you. I'll be loyal to my wedded wife. With time, I'll try to love her and accept her as the love of my life.

I'm sorry for doing this to you. For now, onwards, I'm going to start a new chapter of my life. I'll try my best to keep my wife happy.

Goodbye, My love."

I was in trance after reading his entry. It was broken by the knock on the door.