Chapter CLXXXIV: No throne to sit on

Princess Alina had always been a beacon of warmth and grace at court, beloved by the people and admired by the nobility. Her marriage to Prince Zayr was seen as a union of strength, an alliance meant to secure the future of the kingdom. Yet, behind the facade of a perfect royal marriage, things were far from harmonious.

Since their wedding, Zayr had become increasingly distant, his coldness growing with each passing day. Their nights together were few and far between, and when they did share the same bed, there was no tenderness, no connection. Zayr was consumed with the responsibilities that had been thrust upon him since the sudden departure of his siblings. With their absence, Zayr had been forced to shoulder much of their duties, and it left him with little time or energy for anything else.

Alina, who had once felt secure in the knowledge that she was cherished by her husband, now found herself feeling isolated, neglected, and utterly alone. She longed for Zayr’s affection, for his attention, for the promise of a family. Yet, it seemed as though the distance between them grew wider with each passing day. She tried to reassure herself that Zayr’s commitment to her was unshakable, that his lack of intimacy was just a consequence of his heavy burdens. But that didn’t quell the ache in her heart, nor did it erase the gnawing feeling that she had been cast aside, a pawn in a political game.

One day, as she made her way to the coin master’s office to inquire about using crown resources to build a new orphanage, Alina had hoped for a simple, charitable discussion. She sought to do something good for the kingdom, to fulfill her role as a princess, to help those in need. But the ledger the coin master handed her would bring her a painful discovery.

There, in the entries, she saw the regular payments her husband made to a woman in Allendor. The realization hit her like a blow to the chest, and she knew immediately what it meant. The coldness she had felt from him, the neglect, suddenly clicked into place. She didn’t know if it was the betrayal, the secrecy, or the feeling that she was merely part of a plan to him that made her heart shatter, but it was enough to break her trust.

That night, Alina waited for him in his bedroom. She could feel her heart racing, her hands trembling with anger and hurt. Zayr entered, as stoic and unreadable as ever, but when he saw her standing there, waiting, his expression softened with concern.

“Is everything alright?” he asked, his voice lacking any real warmth.

Alina’s emotions, which she had been holding back for so long, burst forth like a dam breaking. She threw her hands up in frustration. “You promised me, Zayr! You promised me that we would be together. That we would build a life together.”

Zayr’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“I know about the payments,” Alina said, her voice trembling with anger and betrayal. “You’ve been paying this woman, Zayr. For months! Is this how you’ve been honoring your promise to me? By keeping a mistress?”

Zayr’s face paled as he tried to explain, his voice desperate and defensive. “Alina, it’s not like that. She’s... She was my mistress before we were married. I cut ties with her months ago, before the wedding. I sent her away long before we were wed, but I’ve been supporting her because she has no one else. I swear to you, there’s nothing between us anymore.”

Alina’s eyes searched his face, trying to find the sincerity she once knew, but the emptiness that had settled between them left her uncertain. “Then why are you still paying her, Zayr? Why are you helping her, if you’ve truly moved on?” she demanded, her voice rising with frustration. “You couldn’t even tell me the truth. You couldn’t even tell me what was going on, and now you expect me to just accept it?”

Zayr’s breath hitched, and he stepped toward her, trying to close the gap between them. “Alina, I know you’re upset. I know things have been hard. But we’re both under immense pressure. I have responsibilities, and I’ve been doing the best I can to manage everything. It’s complicated, and I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Complicated?” Alina echoed, her voice bitter. “You think it’s complicated? This isn’t about anything complicated, Zayr! It’s about me. About us. You’ve been so focused on everything else—the kingdom, your duties, your responsibilities—that you’ve forgotten about me. About us.” She shook her head in frustration. “You promised me, but you’ve barely spent any time with me! I feel like I’m nothing more than an afterthought to you.”

Zayr took a step back, his shoulders slumping. “I’m sorry, Alina. I never meant to make you feel this way. But you have to understand—I’m not trying to neglect you. Everything changed when my siblings left. The pressure, the duties... It's overwhelming. But that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I do care, more than you know. But I can’t be the husband you want me to be right now. Not when there’s so much else that needs my attention.”

Alina’s heart ached, but she was no longer sure what to believe. “Then why are you doing this?” she whispered, her voice cracking. “Why are you taking over your brother’s duties? You promised me this wouldn’t be your fight. You promised that we would be together. But instead, you’ve buried yourself in your duties, in your past. And now, I’m here, alone, watching as everything slips through my fingers.”

Zayr looked at her with confusion and pain. “Alina, I’m not going to be king,” he said softly. “I’m not trying to take the throne from Ikkar. I’m not doing this for me. I’m doing this for the kingdom, for my family... for everyone.”

Alina stood there, her hands shaking as she tried to hold back tears. “Then what about me, Zayr?” she whispered. “What about us? If you’re going to fight for the throne, then I’m here. I’ll support you. I’ll be patient, I’ll wait... But if you don’t, what’s the point?”

Zayr closed his eyes, his face full of exhaustion. “I know, Alina. I know...”

Alina reached up and took his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her. “You don’t have to sacrifice your life for your brother. You deserve more than that, Zayr. You deserve to live your life. And if you truly want me, if you truly want us, then we need to fight for it. But I can’t do this alone, I can’t be married to you alone.”

Zayr had been raised under the shadow of his older brother with a singular sense of duty drilled into him since childhood. He had always been second in line, always expected to support, to sacrifice, to be the quiet force behind Ikkar’s reign. It was a life of duty, not choice—a life where his own desires were often pushed aside. He had accepted it without question, finding purpose in the sacrifices he made, believing his role was to support Ikkar, to hold things together when his brother faltered. That had always been his place.

But now, with Ikkar gone and the burden of leadership placed on his shoulders, something had shifted. Zayr had never heard anyone tell him that he deserved to live for himself, that he had the right to find happiness outside of his obligations. That was until Alina.

She had spoken to him in a way no one ever had. She had called him to something he had long abandoned—a life of his own, outside of the shadow of his brother. The idea felt foreign, almost too much to grasp at first. He had always considered his life one of service, one of quiet sacrifice, but Alina's words had planted a seed in him. A seed that began to take root, despite his resistance.

She had looked at him with warmth in her eyes, a tenderness that made his heart ache with something he couldn’t quite place. She cared for him, truly cared, and for the first time, he realized it wasn’t just duty that had bound them together. She was a remarkable woman—gentle, kind, thoughtful, and full of grace. In the midst of his turmoil, Zayr felt a surge of gratitude. He was lucky to have her, even if their marriage hadn’t been born of love.

But what if it could be? Zayr hadn’t allowed himself to even entertain the idea of love. His world had always revolved around his family, his kingdom, and the heavy mantle he had inherited. But Alina had shown him something else—something more than mere duty.

They weren’t in love, both of them knew that, but there was potential for something. A connection, a partnership that could grow. It was a possibility Zayr had pushed aside, but now it felt real, tangible.

The air between them crackled with unspoken emotion, and as Alina spoke, her words seemed to strip away the walls he had carefully built around himself. Something burned inside his chest—a longing he hadn’t recognized until now. She wasn’t just his wife in name. She was a woman he could learn to care for, someone who made him feel seen, not just as the prince who had to live in his brother’s shadow, but as himself.

Without thinking, Zayr closed the distance between them. He cupped her face gently in his hands, his thumb brushing against her soft skin. Alina’s eyes widened in surprise, but there was no fear in them. Only a quiet acceptance, a silent invitation. He had never wanted this before, never desired her like this—but in that moment, everything shifted. She was his wife, and he had kissed her before, but now… now, he wanted it in a way he had never wanted anything, ever. Zayr kissed her—deeply, passionately. The kiss was everything he had denied himself for so long. It was a confession, a release of the restraint he had held in place. It was a promise, unspoken but understood, that there was more to their union than duty. He wanted her. Not just as his wife, but as the woman who had the power to unlock something inside of him he didn’t know existed.

For the first time in years, Zayr allowed himself to feel—truly feel. The weight of his responsibilities, the burden of his past, all faded away in that kiss. There was only her, only the burning need to connect, to be something more than a prince bound by obligation.

When they finally broke apart, both of them breathless, Zayr found himself looking into her eyes, searching for something—anything—that would tell him this was the right choice. Alina’s gaze was warm, her lips parted in quiet surprise, but there was no fear, no hesitation.

“Zayr…” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

He didn’t have the answers yet, but for the first time, he was willing to find them. He was no longer just the prince caught in his brother’s shadow. He was Zayr, a man who might just want more than the life he had been given. And, for the first time, he was willing to let Alina in.