CHAPTER 32: Shattered Hearts

CLAIRE’s P.O.V.

“Darren! Wait!” I shouted as I ran after him.

He didn’t bother to look at me. He dashed inside of his car, slamming the door shut at my face. I tapped his window several times, but he didn’t open up. I can see him putting his key through the tinted window.

When I realized that Darren doesn't want to talk to me anymore, I quickly went in front of his car, tapping the bumper of it in order for him to notice me. He blown his horn twice, but I didn’t move away or even bulge. This time, he finally hopped down to face me.

“What the fuck do you want?!”

“Darren... Please listen to me. Let me explain...”

“Why would I?! I already saw it with my own eyes, Claire! What more do you want?! My money?!”

“No! Just please let me explain everything...”

“For what?! To make me believe in your fucking lies again? You just used me! I thought I finally found someone deserving... Someone that would love me for who I am... But I was wrong...” He broke down in tears.

“That picture wasn’t real... Y-yes it is but... It’s not what it looks like! Believe me, Darren!”

“Fucking no! You said it yourself. That photo is real and that classmate of yours fucking kissed you! Why didn’t you tell me about it, Claire?! Is he better than me? Richer? Tell me!”

“Believe me, I tried to tell you about it, Darren. It’s just that...”

“I don’t want to hear any of your fucked up reasons anymore. Kate clearly stated everything!” he shouted to my face.

Tears started to stream down on my cheeks. Here we go again. He doesn’t want to listen to any of my explanations. But I couldn’t blame him either way. It was me who ruined Kate and I’s friendship. It was also me who let him down. This is all my fault.

“I didn’t just used you, Darren. Yes, I’ll admit it. That is how I thought of this deal before, because I need the money for Dad and Alexa. But believe me, after a while, I finally realized that I love you... I love you and I couldn’t bare to lose you, Darren...”

“That’s what I thought before too. I thought you love me. I even blame myself for hurting you so many times. Now I realized that you’re only saying that for our deal. For the money. You’re nothing but a manipulative woman. You don’t love me, Claire. Cause if you do, I wouldn’t have been able to saw that photo of you kissing another guy. Thank you for making me believe that someone could really love me. You hurt me a lot crashing that thought...”

“Darren please...” I grabbed his arm but he harshly sway it away from me.

“Don’t! Just please don’t touch me!”

“Why can’t you just listen to me?!” I fired back, frustrated.

“Because you are a liar!”

I looked down, trying not to burst out in tears. He was about to open the door of his car when I say something that made him stop.

“Is that what you think of me? Do you think I’ll cry and beg you to listen to me just for once if I don’t really love you, Darren?” He just looked at me and smirked.

“You can do anything for the money, I guess.”

That one literally broke my heart. I ran towards him and hug him very tight. I felt him stiffened, but after a while, he roughly pushed my body away from his.

“Stop acting, Claire!” he shouted.

For the second time since I meet him, I saw him cried so hard. His tears were already starting to fall down from his eyes.

“Don’t you ever blame me for this. You did this to us... You did this to yourself...”

“I didn’t want any of this, Darren...”

He shook his head, backing away from me while raising both of his hands upward like he’s surrendering to someone.

“You know what? Forget about all of this. Forget about us. Fuck love.”

After he said that, I couldn’t open my mouth to speak anymore. All I could think of as of this moment was the unbearable pain inside of my chest. He got inside of his car, before driving at a high speed.

As he disappeared from my sight, people started to get outside to see what happened. My knees trembled, unable to hold my body anymore. I sat down, hugged myself and cry like a little child. I could feel those disappointed eyes on me. Those awful stares giving me judgements.

I could even choke on my own tears as I started to ran out of air. I feel like I was suffocated.

“Claire...” Mr. Herrera tapped my shoulder.

I looked up on him, seeing his worried face. How funny that he didn’t even get mad at us for lying to him.

“I-I’m s-sorry...”

“I’ll go and talk to my son.”

I nodded, unconsciously. As I did that action, he vanished as quickly as possible. Elijah is also here, right now. He look at me with pity on his eyes. He was about to come towards me but I didn’t let him. I stood up, and run as fast as I can.

I don’t want to be comforted by anyone right now. Because the last time I did, something very bad happen. I didn’t know that Kate is watching us very closely. Not that I care, cause for all I know, that kiss is not what it looks like. Too bad that Darren didn’t even listen to me.

“Darren...” I whispered in the dead, silent air.

I badly wanted to see him, but I couldn’t. And I’m pretty sure that he doesn’t even want see me anymore. I decided to walk home, not bothering the heavy heart inside of my chest.

“Claire!” It was Alexa who greeted me first. “Are you alright? You look sad.”

She hugged me worriedly.

“I’m fine. I’m just... Tired, you know.”

“Where is Darren? Why didn’t he take you home?” she asked, arching one of her brows.

“He’s busy.”

“Oh. Okay. Anyways, Dad told me to sleep early today because our grandma called earlier and he wants to talk to you about it.”

“Really?” I asked, trying to look tough.

“Yeah. Good night, Claire. Dad is in the kitchen.”

I nodded before letting her go. I instantly went to the kitchen, wiping the excess tears in the corners of my eyes.

“Hey, Dad. I’m home.”

“Too soon? I thought that party was supposed to be your fake engagement party? What happened, Claire?”

“I-it’s a l-long story, D-Dad,” I stuttered as I uttered those words.

“Did something bad happened again?”

That moment, I couldn’t contain myself anymore. I burst out into tears and Dad looked at me with his shocked eyes, worried at the same time.

“The deal is off. Darren didn’t want me anymore.”

“That’s what I’m telling you about!” he exclaimed, making me stunned for a moment. “I already warned you, Claire. That man wouldn’t bring any good to you.”

“I’m sorry, Dad...”

“You chose that thing. You chose to be hurt.”

“I didn’t Dad! I don’t want any of this to happen! I only chose to love... Is that wrong?”

“Choosing love is like choosing pain. That’s the reason why I always warn you.”

“What will I do now, Dad? I couldn’t bare to loose him... I can’t.”

“Yes, you can! Come on, Claire. You’ve been breathing air and leaving life for twenty-four years without him... You can do that again... Alexa and I are here for you.”

I wiped my tears away, trying to act brave. As if that’s how easy it is. This situation was nothing but a nightmare, a nightmare that ruined my wonderful dream. Now I couldn’t wake up anymore.

“Your grandma called. She wants to take us New York, and live with her.”

My heart skipped a beat. Is this God’s way of answering my prayers? To leave from this country and continue my life living without Darren? But... I’ll never see him again after we leave... I need to think about this very carefully before making any decisions.

“I’ll let you think about that, Claire. But if it was me, I’ll let her take us. She promised that she’ll provide everything that we need once we arrived there. And Alexa and you doesn’t have to suffer the same fate your Mom and I did.”

I just nodded at him, before going into my room. I sat on my bed, staring at the empty air. Is this my chance to forget all of this pain? If it is, and right after I confirmed that Darren doesn’t want me anymore, then I’ll gladly take it. Maybe it’s worth it to try.

My thoughts was interrupted by a loud beeps coming from my phone. I picked it up, staring at Elijah’s name on the screen. I wanted to ignore it, but my fingers already tap the answer button.

“Claire! I already send you the address of the hospital! Please come! Darren had an accident right after he left earlier. His father called me requesting for your presence. Please come! This is not a joke!”

After he said that, he quickly turn off the phone as if he’s rushing or something. Panicked rushed through me, thinking that I’m the reason behind that accident. I grabbed my jacket, put it on at the top of my dress and ran towards outside. Without thinking, I let my heart decides against my brain. I don’t care anymore if it’s worth it or not, but at least I tried, right?