Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty
Connor’s cabin was across passageway from Selen’s. The same size, the same layout, but it was so much more simple: his foldout bunk and desk; his closet of basic clothes; his duffel bag. Trophies and memories of lost comrades…those would fill a room twice the size of his.
Although he did have a different sort of small trophy box of his own in his closet.
Everything had a simple smell, too. The smell of his body, the soap he used, the barely noticeable cologne that had hints of springtime.
And rivers.
His life was stripped down and uncomplicated. It had been since surviving the slaughter of the Nyango Revolt.
Connor paced, his sneakers softly scuffing the floor.
Despite the narrow gap separating his cabin from Selen’s, he usually felt comfortable in his quarters. If anything, it was a little warm compared to the rest of the ship.
After talking with Gregor and Mosiah, the compartment felt almost icy.
Gregor’s tale about the mysterious rescue signal coming from the planet was bad enough. Dead soldiers radioing from the planet surface—after their bodies had been pulped and sent into space?
It was absurd. Nonsense. Children told each other tales to frighten one another, and those tales were often less outlandish.
But the idea of an SOS rattled around in Connor’s head.
The voices were present, as if he were in the radio room. “Save us.”
Ignoring the absurd tale would have been easy—automatic—if not for Mosiah confirming everything as he had.
What had he said? He was the only one to ever escape the planet alive? Something like that.
But the old man wasn’t even afraid of going back. How did that work?
The hatch bell chimed.
Connor came to a stop and pulled out his pocket computer. The camera built into the hatch showed Selen standing alone, one arm crossed over her breasts, the other bent up so that she could chew on her thumbnail. She still wore the black shorts and tank top from before, but her hair wasn’t mussed, so she hadn’t been asleep.
He sucked in a breath, then opened the hatch, blocking the entry.
Her eyes darted past him, searching the room. It was as if she thought someone would be in there.
Who? He and Martienne weren’t even friends. Dawn…had never been his type. Aubriella? That felt like robbing the cradle. Kalpana? No one really knew for sure what curled her toes, as she liked to say, but it wasn’t him.
Maybe Selen realized that, because her eyes came up to his. “Can I come in?”
“I’m not sure I feel comfortable with that.”
“I’ve been acting odd. I know.” She looked at the deck. “I’m sorry.”
“You came to apologize?”
She chewed on her for second, then looked up again. “I came to explain.”
A voice in the back of his head told him to send her away, there were too many things that couldn’t be explained.
But he stepped back.
Selen slipped past, her bare feet soft on the hard deck. Connor thought about leaving the hatch open. It seemed a betrayal of trust.
He closed it and extended the chair that was part of the desk assembly, then waved a hand for her to take the seat.
She shook her head and leaned against his bunk. “You know about the planet.”
Connor took the chair himself. “I know what Gregor told me. And I know what little Mosiah said.”
“He talked to you? You asked him?”
“We talked. It doesn’t make this place sound very nice.”
“You mean it sounds terrifying.”
He shrugged. “Do you believe it?”
She levered herself onto the top of his bunk, set her back against the bulkhead, then brought her knees up under her chin. “A lot of things in the universe don’t make sense. You try to figure them out, but you just don’t have the information on them yet.”
“Science takes its time.”
“It does. I think that’s what this planet is: something science hasn’t figured out yet.”
“So you believe the stories.”
“I…” She wrapped her arms around her legs. “You and me, were leaders. We make decisions based on the available data. We look for the lowest risk and the highest reward.”
“All right.”
“When you have this big bucket of…unknown thrown at you, what do you do?”
He thought for a moment. “I guess you make the best of it.”
“Is there a best? What’s the worst? Everyone dies? We get crushed so hard, there’s nothing left but goo? How do you know what’s best when that’s the floor?”
“Let’s assume the best is we all get out and make our bonuses.”
Selen buried her face against her legs. “I don’t think that’s realistic.”
The sudden change in Selen’s behavior bothered Connor. This was much closer to normal, except he’d never seen her so rattled and vulnerable. It brought feelings of self-loathing for looking at her so negatively before. All along, she was struggling with fear and doubt, and he was concerned she was going crazy?
He ran his fingers over the bottom of his foldout desktop, which was pinned to its place against the bulkhead. “Mosiah said you saved his life.”
“A long time ago.”
“He was in trouble.”
“Mosiah has a lot of friends with a great deal of money and connections. The thing is, he did a lot of terrible things in his life. They all did. So he had enemies, too. Some of them gained power when he wasn’t paying attention.”
“Someone like you’re describing is usually too paranoid for that.”
Selen’s dark eyes rose above her knees. “He’d tried to retire. I guess he grew tired of being…dirty. All the money he made and spent weighed on him.”
“He was corrupt?”
“I think extreme might be better. He eliminated people. He kept bad people in power, and he took care of their annoying enemies. That’s how I heard about him at first. Some people I knew had clients vanish.”
“And you still hired on to rescue him?”
“I hired on to recover some artifacts for people he’d stolen from years ago.”
Artifacts! “Those crates of his in the cargo hold—”
“Maybe. The ones I was hired to find were archaeological finds.”
Connor grunted. “I asked him about that.”
“About what?”
“About whether or not he’d taken something from this planet. He didn’t deny it.”
“You always were good connecting the dots. It’s a great talent. You have so many. It’s why I respect you. You do so much. I told you I can’t replace you.”
Heat flushed Connor’s cheeks. “Thanks.”
“Did he say he did? Did he take things from this planet?”
“He didn’t say no.”
“He seems to like collecting things. Or he did. Anyway, I couldn’t locate what I was looking for when I went to the planet where he was a prisoner. There were no leads. I needed him alive. I could follow him, maybe figure out where he’d hidden things.”
“If you’d known where these artifacts were, would you have let him die?”
“I told you, he’s a bad person. He doesn’t have enemies because he’s misunderstood.”
“Maybe he’s reformed.”
Selen buried her face against her thighs again. “People like him don’t reform.”
“Those other artifacts—did you ever find them?”
“No.” Her voice cracked. “People died trying. And now I’m worried I’m doing the same thing all over again.”
Without realizing what he was doing, Connor crossed to the bunk. “You’re going to be okay.” He set a hand on her shoulder. “You’re so cold. Are you okay?”
“I’m scared. I’m terrified. I don’t want my people killed.”
“Then we’ll do everything we can to keep them alive.”
“Can I—” Her eyes dropped to the necklace outlined under his T-shirt, then narrowed. “Can I stay here? Just…I don’t want to be alone.”
He tensed. “I—”
“Nothing will happen. Not unless you want.” She lifted her chin up. It was a defiant yet vulnerable look that always hit him hard. “Would that be a problem? For your…for Toshiko?”
Connor brushed hair back from Selen’s face. She could be so attractive, even with the years and the job wearing on her. “You can stay. Nothing will happen.”
Too quick for him to even be sure it was real, it seemed like the fury he’d seen earlier flashed across her face.
Then she smiled as sweet a smile as he could remember and kissed him. “Thanks.”
She pulled the covers back and slid under them, forcing her tank top to ride up and reveal the small of her back.
Blood pounded in his head. Any other night, things would have quickly gotten out of hand.
That was before Toshiko and their renewed feelings.
He covered Selen up. “I need to do a final inspection of the ship.”
Selen turned. “All right.” But she sounded disappointed.
Connor turned the light out and hurried out of the cabin. It was hard to breathe, the desire for someone so close and so familiar warring with the love for someone so far away.
After a moment, he was able to walk steadily. His mind cleared a little, enough for him to wonder why Selen cared so much about the necklace Toshiko had gifted.
If he called her using encryption device she’d given him, he’d have to ask what the necklace was.