Chapter Seven: Addy

It wasn’t them he was holding hostage.
“Just the two of you?” the server asked. She had a thick Southern accent that sounded out of place in Oregon.
“Can we get a booth?” Jay asked. He stepped up beside Addy, one hand touching, just barely, the small of her back.
“Of course,” she said. “Follow me.” She led them to a private table in the corner, setting menus down for them. Jay scooped them up and handed them back to her.
“We’ll have two burgers and fries,” he said.
Addy glared at him, annoyed, but even then, a burger and fries sounded just fine. She was starving.
“Anything to drink?”
“Just water,” Jay said.
“A Coke for me,” Addy cut in, and she ignored Jay as he slumped his shoulders and rolled his eyes. The waitress delivered their drinks, and she took a long sip, trying to ease the raw and scratchy feeling in her throat. She reached for a napkin and pressed it against the palms of her hands, wincing. As she dabbed at the drying blood, Jay reached over for a fresh napkin. He dipped the tip into his ice water, squeezed the excess out, and held his hand out to her.
“Come on.”
For a moment, Addy only stared at him, wondering what he was up to now. He said nothing else, just waited patiently. After debating for a moment, she reached out her hand to his. Jay took it gently, her palm up on his own as he dabbed dried blood with the moist napkin.
“You’re lucky this place is a fucking ghost town,” Jay said as he dabbed. “I don’t think anyone saw your stupid stunt.”
“I wouldn’t want you to worry about that.” She glared at him, wishing she could cause him the same pain he’d been throwing at her since they’d been together. But considering the situation she was in, she was confident that tossing bitter hate around wouldn’t get her free of him any more quickly. She needed to think, not get pissed off.
“I do worry about it, Addy, because you’re going to fuck this up for me.” Jay drew the napkin away to re-wet it, but before he could, Addy yanked her arm away as the waitress reappeared at their table. She caught a whiff of the hamburger as the plate was placed in front of her, and her stomach rumbled. She took a drink of her Coke and watched Jay from across the table. He was putting together his burger; lettuce, pickles, onions, and then ketchup and mustard. As he did this, careful not to lose any of his toppings, he squirted ranch onto his plate and dipped the burger in it.
“Gross,” Addy said. She picked up a French fry, savoring the heat and salty taste it left behind.
“What’s gross?” With his free hand, Jay brushed a strand of black hair out of his eyes, staring at her.
“Ranch is gross,” she said.
“Ranch is delicious.
“No. Fry sauce is delicious.” She reached for the little cup of mayonnaise, grabbed the ketchup bottle, and mixed the two. Jay watched her do this, not saying much as she dipped a fry into the cup and ate it. “Perfect.”
When he didn’t answer, she slid the cup of fry sauce over to him without a word. For a second he ignored it, but then he dipped one fry in and popped it in his mouth.
“Meh,” he said, but reached for another fry to dip. Try as she might continue hating him, Addy had to fight to hide a triumphant smile.
“Where are we going now?” she asked.
Jay didn’t answer, and she didn’t have the energy to push it. As she ate her burger, she wondered what would happen if someone recognized her, Jay, or even Ryan’s car, which was technically stolen. Would the police come? Would she get away? Better yet, would she get away without being killed or injured? Would someone else get killed? Was Jay even capable of killing someone?
“I swear to God; you’re the slowest person I’ve ever met,” Jay said.
Addy glanced down at her plate, realizing she’d only eaten a few fries and two bites of her burger. “I like to taste my food, not inhale it.”
He stared at her over the rim of the water glass, silent. His eyes were vivid and bright today, reading her, scanning the lines on her face. His bangs kept falling into his eyes, and every time Jay reached up to swipe them out of the way, Addy had the uncomfortable urge to reach over and do it herself.
“I don’t know if I can tolerate you much longer,” he said.
“You brought this on yourself. What the hell did you expect?”
Jay said nothing, only continued to scowl. As soon as Addy popped the last French fry into her mouth, she wiped her fingers and looked at Jay.
“I have to pee,” she said, leaning forward to rest her elbows on the table. She wasn’t sure what sick satisfaction she got out of annoying him, but she did.
“We were just at the motel. Why didn’t you pee then?”
“I didn’t have to go then,” she said. “I have to go now.”
“Seriously?”
“Um. Seriously, Jay,” Addy said.
He rolled his eyes and stood up, looking less than thrilled, but she knew he couldn’t make a scene in public.
“I know where the bathroom is,” Addy said. “I’ve also been potty trained. I can do it myself.”
“After that circus act you pulled in the car? I don’t think so. Come on.” He took her arm, more gently this time, she noticed and led her along the aisle of tables and chairs.
“What are you doing?” They stopped in front of the restroom door.
Jay dropped her arm and started forward, ignoring her protests.
“That’s the ladies’ room.” She watched wide-eyed as he stepped into the bathroom, making it a point to check every empty stall as he did so.
“I can’t take my chances,” he said. “Not after what you did outside.”
“I thought we were past your insecurities,” said Addy. “Insecurities are the gateway to a terrible relationship, Jay. Everybody knows that.”
He stared at her, looking anything but amused. “Can you just pee now?”
“Fine. Shut the door.”
“Five minutes,” he said. “And don’t fucking lock it. I’ll check.”
As he closed the door behind him on his way out, Addy finally allowed herself to breathe. In front of him, she would keep her guard up. No breaking down. No crying. No being the victim. But when she was alone, she could feel her confidence crumble, and she saw the pain and hurt in her own eyes when she looked at herself in the mirror. She had to stay strong; she had to keep that wall up and never allow him to break it down. It was her only chance at getting out alive.
Under the jacket, she felt smothered and hot, like she’d been lying under the sun in a winter coat for too long. She unzipped the jacket and took it off for a moment to cool down, then peeled off her skimpy tank top as a heat flash came over her. She stared at herself in the mirror, in only jeans and her bra now, and she couldn’t bring herself to look away from the jagged red scars up and down both arms. Old scars and fresh scars. Long and short—some dreadfully deep and others only cosmetic; scars toting the burden of pain and hurt and betrayal and jealousy. Her oldest scar was marked at the tender age of thirteen—her newest one from the night of the party.
The bruises on her arms from where Ryan had once upon a time grabbed her in drunken anger were fading, but the nasty one on her chest boasted a dark purple and blue color. When she thought of Ryan this time, she was angry. Angry at him, per usual, but even more angry at herself. There was something wrong with her, something that haunted her very core every day she stayed with a man like Ryan. Because, God, she loved him.
And she hated him. She fucking hated him with so much passion it frightened her sometimes. And more than she hated what Ryan did to her, she hated what she let Ryan do to her even more.
Running the water in the sink on cold, Addy splashed her face and rubbed the coolness on her chest, trying to get a grip. Fuck Ryan, he couldn’t help her now. So, what were her options? She could lock herself in the bathroom and hope that someone besides Jay would come to her rescue. She could try to sneak past him and out the door, but he was too smart for that. She doubted he was far from the door at that very moment.
Addy pulled her tangled, wavy hair away from her face and into a messy bun, allowing the air to cool down the back of her neck. She leaned down to splash her face once more when the soap dispenser caught her eye. She looked rapidly back at the door, expecting Jay to be standing there, but she was still alone.
Frantically, Addy pumped a few squirts of soap into her hands and rubbed them together, lathering it up. She looked once more toward the door then stood on her toes to scrawl words onto the mirror.
Adaline Connor
Kidnapped in SilverSUV
Call Police!!!
She cranked on the sink to wash her hands before reaching for her jacket to put it back on. She was about to slip out when there was a rap on the door. She froze, a deer in headlights.
“There’s someone in here!” she shouted. “I’m not dre—” She stopped, horrified, as the knob turned, and the door opened. Ignoring her protests, Jay stepped in, shutting it behind him. Shame and embarrassment tugged at Addy as she struggled to cover the upper half of her body, defenseless under Jay’s sharp gaze.
“Did you get lost?”
“Fuck you.” Skin on fire, Addy saw Jay’s eyes travel up and down the uncovered part of her body. He said nothing more, but his expression was neutral, difficult to read. She yanked her jacket on and fumbled with the zipper in anger, flustered and hot with discomfort. Her hands were shaking with rage, itching to bash his nose in.
“You’re an asshole,” she said.
Jay looked unruffled, as though he hadn’t just caught her standing half-naked in the bathroom. She walked toward him to hurry them out, but it was too late. He caught a glimpse of the message written on the mirror and froze, his eyes flicking back to Addy. Before she could say anything, he rushed forward, shoving past her for a handful of paper towels that he used to scrub the soap from the mirror. He was mumbling under his breath, but Addy could only make out the words idiot and fuckitall.
Saying nothing, Jay grabbed hold of Addy and dragged her toward the door as she struggled to get her sweatshirt done up. His hand dropped from her upper arm to just below her elbow in front of people, but his grip was seething with fury. They passed their table and Jay dropped some crumpled bills onto their check.
Addy watched the faces of strangers pass as they walked out of the restaurant. They were all so naïve to the situation, absorbed so heavily in their own lives they wouldn’t have a clue.
“We can only drive for so long, you know,” Addy said. Jay threw the keys to her and slid into the passenger’s seat as Addy settled behind the wheel. “Eventually every road ends. You can’t run forever.” She cleared her throat, thinking of the scars engraved in her skin.
Trust me; I’ve tried.
“Watch me,” Jay said.
With a sigh, she lowered herself back into Ryan’s car and turned on the engine. Somewhere behind them, hundreds and hundreds of miles out of reach, her home faded farther and farther into the distance.