Chapter 8

I pushed Jason away from me as anxiousness washed over my face.

‘Fuck! I can't screw this up, this is only my first day!’

Looking back and forth between the office door and Jason, I started panicking when I felt a hand on my cheek, I looked up to meet Jason's reassuring eyes.

“Relax, sweetheart. It's alright,” I was about to tell him it wasn't alright when he pulled me towards another door in his office.

“Come with me,” he said and opened the door before guiding me in, it was a bathroom. “Stay here, until I come and open the door,” with that he was gone, gently closing the bathroom door behind him.

I could still hear the muffled knocks, each knocks louder than the last.

Rolling my eyes at Luke's impatient and rude behavior, I went over to the sink and rested my back on the counter, finally sighing in relief.

My heart was still beating like it would jump out of my ribcage any moment now.

But I knew the adrenaline rush I was feeling in my body was more because of what I was doing before my husband's sudden interruption than my fear of getting caught doing that.

I heard the sound of the door opening and closing before it grew quiet.

Jason must have taken the time to clear the mess before unlocking the door for Luke.

I could hear them talking, but I couldn't make out the words of their conversation but I did hear the word party, mentioned a handful of times.

Although I was curious I wasn't going to make any attempt to snoop in on their conversation because my YSL heels were loud and the closed space I was in would only make the sound echo if I walked.

The seven minutes I was standing in here felt incredibly long.

After what felt like hours, I finally heard the door open and close and not even ten seconds later the bathroom door opened revealing Jason.

He walked inside with his hand in his trouser pockets, “He left,” he said and I nodded back.

“I'm glad,” replying sarcastically, I stood up straight from my leaning position, intending to leave but Jason was suddenly enclosed in my personal space.

He put his hands on the counter behind me, trapping me in between, “Now, where did we leave off?”

With an amusing smile, he leaned his face closer to me but I put a hand on his mouth and pushed it back.

“I'm leaving,” I stated and tried to shrug his hand off the counter to escape but he didn't budge. And even leaned in more closer, until our bodies were not quite pressed but touching each other.

“You don't get to decide everything, all the time sweetheart,” he drawled out, his tone carrying seriousness.

“I'm not going to start an argument now, so leave me,” I replied but he only chuckled in return.

“What? If we do argue, you'll only say it was a mistake. Like you always do. When we both know it wasn't. You wanted it just as much as I did. I do,” he said bluntly.

Leaning in closer to my ear, he whispered, “And you enjoyed it just as much, I could tell by the way you were trying to grind your hips on mine.”

He never failed to make me speechless.

I wasn't surprised by his observation, I always took him as a mind reader.

“Yes, Jason. I did want it but I shouldn't and that's where my mistake lies! Wanting you when I know I shouldn't!” I yelled at him in frustration.

I was already overwhelmed with these new raw emotions I was feeling for him.

All those months ago when we spent the night together, since that day, he was constantly on my mind.

The next morning he had left before I woke up but I remembered the bouquet of orchids and the note he had left for me alongside the ordered breakfast.

*“Thank you for gracing my night with your presence, sweetheart.

Merhaba”*


His note didn't say anything else. No number, no contact details, nothing. And I knew it was because he didn't want to.

But not even a day passed after the incident and I was already troubling my best friend to help me look for him.

She used her connections but we didn't get anything on him, much less any source to contact him.

I tried to find him. I looked for him constantly for over a month, until I stopped because I couldn't find anything on him. And I was disappointed because a single night spent with him had made me crave for him. I was getting addicted to an addiction, I had no idea how to sate. So I stopped before I lost my sanity.

Who knew that when we met, it would be like this?

In a situation where we were both bound by relationships that restricted us from doing anything equivalent to what I wanted.

And still defying all the logic and rationality, I did it.

There was this pull to him that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't resist getting back to him. His touches always set my skin on fire.

Even now when he was holding me by the waist, standing so close to me, breathing the same air as me, I wanted nothing else but to wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him, and give in to my desires.

I so badly wanted to do that, but I couldn't.

There was no explanation I had for what I felt for him, I didn't love him, I knew that.

But I wanted him like I have never wanted anyone. Like I would never want anyone.

Holding his jaw in my hands, I leaned up until my mouth was a mere inch away from him, looking at his lips, I saw the bite on his bottom lip, my doing.

I leaned up and kissed his lips softly and then pulled away instantly. My mouth was still hovering above his, “If only you weren't his brother,” I whispered in his mouth and with a shaky breath pulled away completely, shrugging his hand off my waist I left.