CH. 32

The porch creaked under her weight as she sat on the swing, the night air wrapping around her like a comforting blanket. The farm was bathed in moonlight, the animals' gentle sounds the only company she had. As she waited, she thought about the journey that had brought her here, from the chaos of the city to the tranquility of the countryside, and the two men who had become her world. The distant rumble grew louder, and soon the headlights of Mike's truck pierced the darkness. The gravel crunched under the tires as he pulled up to the house, the engine cutting out with a final sigh. She watched as he climbed out, his silhouette tall and strong against the dimly lit night. Her heart hammered in her chest as she stood up, the swing swaying gently behind her. He took the porch steps two at a time, his eyes searching for her in the shadows. "What's wrong, Renee?" he asked again, his voice filled with genuine concern as he reached for her. She stepped into his embrace, her body molding against his like it was made to fit. The warmth of his touch sent a comforting wave through her, but it couldn't ease the turmoil in her heart. She didn't know where to begin, how to explain the storm of emotions that swirled within her. With a deep breath, she pulled away, her eyes locking onto his. "Mike, there's something I need to tell you," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. He searched her face, his own expression unreadable. "I got a call from Jake tonight," she continued, watching for his reaction. Mike's eyes widened slightly, but he remained silent, allowing her to continue. "He's coming to visit in a few weeks," she explained, her voice shaking. "He says he's sorted things out and wants to be a part of our lives again." Renee could feel the weight of her words hanging in the air, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.
After a moment that felt like an eternity, Mike spoke, his voice steady and calm. "I see," he said, his thumbs gently stroking her back in a soothing motion. "And what do you want, Renee?" Her eyes searched his, looking for a clue, a hint of anger or disappointment, but all she saw was a gentle understanding that seemed to say, 'I'm here for you, no matter what'. "I am the happiest I have ever been with you, but I also did not get far with Jake to know if I was happy or not, I don't know," she whispered, her voice shaky knowing that nobody knew about her and Jakes original deal. "I just don't know." Mike took a step back, giving her space, his eyes never leaving hers. "I understand, Renee. You need to explore this. I'll be here, waiting, hoping that you find what you're looking for." He paused, his thumb tracing her jawline. "But know this: no matter what you choose, I'll always be yours. If you decide to give Jake another chance, I'll support you. If you find that your heart is with him, I'll step aside. But if you choose me, I want you to be sure." The sincerity in his voice was like a balm to her soul. She hadn't expected such understanding from Mike, but then again, she had learned that there was much more to him than his rough exterior suggested. "Thank you," she murmured, leaning into his touch. "I don't know what I'd do without you." They stepped inside, the warmth of the farmhouse wrapping around them like a comforting embrace. Mike led her to the couch, his hand at the small of her back, a silent gesture of support. As they settled in, the rich aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the room, a comforting scent that seemed to anchor her. She took a sip, the warmth spreading through her body, grounding her in the present moment.
Renee picked out a random movie from the collection, something light-hearted to distract them from the heavy conversation they were about to have. As the opening credits rolled, she nestled into Mike's embrace, his strong arms a reassurance that she hadn't realized she needed. They watched in companionable silence, their bodies in sync despite the turmoil in her mind. The simple act of being together, sharing a mug of coffee and the glow of the TV, was a stark contrast to the chaos that awaited them.The film was a romantic drama, the kind that Renee usually avoided because it was too close to the bone. But tonight, it was strangely comforting, a mirror reflecting a life she could never have. The woman on screen was torn between her past and her present, just as Renee was with Jake and Mike. She watched as the protagonist stumbled through her days, her heart in two places at once, never quite sure where she belonged. The characters' dialogue resonated with Renee, the raw honesty of their emotions cutting through the superficiality of the film's plot. She felt as though she was looking into a crystal ball, seeing her own future play out before her eyes. The woman in the movie was strong, but the pain etched on her face was unmistakable. It was a stark reminder that no matter how much she tried to bury her feelings, she couldn't escape the reality of her situation.
The film ended with the woman standing alone, her indecision costing her the love of both men. Renee felt a pang of recognition as the credits began to roll, her eyes brimming with tears. She had been that woman for too long, letting fear dictate her choices. The silence in the room was deafening as she turned to face Mike, the weight of her decision pressing down on her like a boulder.
"Mike," she whispered, her voice barely above the soft hum of the TV. "I don't want to see Jake. I can't do this to you, to us." The words tumbled out, a confession that had been bubbling up inside her all evening. He looked at her, his expression unreadable in the dim light.
"Renee," he began, his voice low and even, "you can't ignore what you feel just because you're scared." He paused, his thumb brushing away a stray tear on her cheek. "But I can't make this decision for you."
Renee nodded, her throat tight with unshed sobs. "I know," she managed to say. "But I don't want to hurt you, or the kids. I just... I don't know how to do this." Mike leaned in, his eyes searching hers. "You do what you have too, Renee. I am here no matter what, I promise." His voice was a gentle rumble in the quiet room, a promise that seemed too good to be true. Renee sighed, her heart racing as she tried to articulate the jumble of emotions in her head. Trying to find a way to spill her heart without making herself sound foolish, or even broken. Renee knows how she feels, but is it to soon?