Chapter Ten

Dimitri

‘’This matter shouldn’t be taken lightly. We all know how important this is to the company,’’ One of the members of the board roars his own opinion before sighing, frustrated by the slight downfall of our hotel chains.

For the past week, we’ve received unexpected losses and since then, no one in the company would continue to remain calm. Everyone appears troubled and somewhat stressed even if the loss we’re currently suffering with won’t do much damage.

‘’We have gone through what was necessary,’’ Someone replies, his voice stern and loud. ‘’This is going to get out of hand. We’ve tried everything we can to solve this issue but there’s simply nothing we can do to fix the previous event!’’

‘’We haven’t tried hard enough,’’

‘’What else can we do?’’

‘’There are a lot of other options!’’

My eyebrows furrow at the sight of my employees shouting in anger as they continue to maintain the argument with rage while I do nothing. The way their expressions are expressed through harsh words and unnecessary body language shows how much we behave with our emotions when we’re angry. They simply think they’re doing any good by shouting at each other but they’re actually wasting their time.

‘’I think—‘’ My voice rings out through the meeting room, causing everyone to stop and turn towards me. ‘’—we’ve had enough stress going on for the day. We should continue this meeting when everyone is being fairly rational in order to restore the loss we have faced last week. If everyone is already thinking straight to professionally discuss this issue . . . you know where to find me,’’ I stand up and make my way out of the meeting room with Dion following closely behind me.

‘’Are you alright, sir?’’ Dion asks, trying to match my pace.

‘’Can’t say I am but I can’t say I’m not, either.’’ I respond before sighing and letting my mind wander—the sudden loss, the threats received and even my stolen car. Everything seems to be moving in a negative pattern which would only result in my own doom. The whole thing that has happened would not mean anything much but to put it all together into one, it’s more like a hint.

This hotel chain has gone through its own ups and downs in the past but now that my life is falling apart, nothing feels safe. The threats made in my own apartment was dangerous especially the one in Brody’s room; the words, the knife and the intention behind it. It’s a sign that the one behind all of this is getting closer to me than I would expect. With each passing day, that exact person is moving forward towards his own success.

‘’You seem to have a lot in mind lately,’’ Dion continues to speak with slight hesitation. ‘’Did you skip taking those pills, Mr. Belrose? Are you having more hallucinations?’’ He asks.

‘’That’s not it, Dion. I’m just going through a lot right now,’’ I mutter in defeat. ‘’I appreciate your concern but there’s not much you or the pills can do to fix this.’’ I add.

Just as I continue to walk down the lobby, I am surprised by suddenly bumping into a small figure which causes me to place my hands on her waist to avoid her from hitting the ground. My eyes blink a few times to recognise the familiar figure in my arms as her scent lingers before she starts to look up, our eyes meeting instantly.

‘’Sophia?’’

Her brown eyes widen in surprise as she quickly pushes herself away from me in order to regain her balance, ‘’You should’ve watched where you were going.’’ She says which causes me to scoff.

‘’Excuse me? You were the one who ran into me,’’ I reply, eyeing her every movement to straighten her shirt and fix her hair; tucking in all the strands.

‘’Whatever. Here,’’ She hands me over a couple of familiar files.

‘’Why are you giving me these files?’’ I frown, not exactly understanding the main reason of her appearance here; these files are supposed to be at home in my office on my desk.

‘’It was on the kitchen counter. I thought you might need them,’’ She replies with a shrug. ‘’No thank you? Just sincere confusion?’’ She raises an eyebrow before crossing her arms, eyeing my face.

I chuckle, ‘’That’s not it.’’

‘’Then?’’

‘’I don’t need these files,’’

‘’What do you mean?’’

I stare at her for a few seconds before speaking, ‘’These files are for tomorrow. I don’t need them today but why are they on the kitchen counter and not in my office?’’ I ask.

‘’Well, you won’t forget when you need it tomorrow.’’ She responds.

Both of us continue to stare at each other without uttering a single word, letting the moment past by. It’s quite clear she’s currently eyeing my features and that is why I don’t waste my time doing the opposite. Everything around me seems to fade away including Dion’s presence because there’s just something intriguing about Sophia I haven’t gotten to solve. The way her face is bare of makeup, letting a few small blemishes see through up close—it’s as if nothing is bothering her yet at the same time, she seems troubled.

‘’I’m going then,’’ She says, breaking the trance.

I clear my throat, ‘’Let me take you.’’

‘’No, it’s fine. The café that I work at is just down the street from your hotel. Surprise?’’ She grins, taking a few steps back as I smile. ‘’I’ll see you when I see you,’’ She adds.

‘’Tonight?’’

‘’Yeah,’’ She replies.

‘’Here?’’ I raise an eyebrow.

‘’Uh-huh,’’

Then, she starts to walk out of the hotel lobby and straight down the street until she’s already out of my sight; letting me eye the files in my hand. Just as I’m about to turn around and head back to my office, Dion stops me by grabbing onto my arm.

‘’Your mother is here, sir.’’ He mutters under his breath, only loud enough for the two of us.

‘’What?’’ My eyes widen in surprise before turning around to see my mother stepping out of the car which was driven by Steven. ‘’What is she doing here? What is she doing in New York?’’ I blurt out.

‘’I can’t exactly find the answers you need, Mr. Belrose. Do you want me to Google them?’’ Dion asks, sarcastically while I look around—wanting to hide away from my own mother; knowing that she will only talk about my mental problem.

‘’I appreciate the sarcasm, Dion.’’

‘’Thank you, sir.’’

I immediately make my way towards the stairs but fail miserably as soon as the sound of my mother’s voice is stern clear, ‘’Dimitri Pierre Belrose.’’ She calls out, her heels stopping in the middle of the hotel lobby which causes me to sigh deeply before turning to look at her.

The woman who gave birth to me and the woman who raised me to be the person I am today, she’s a loving person and she cares for those around her. I know that her intentions are clear, only to ensure goodness but sometimes, there are certain lines she shouldn’t bother crossing. ‘’Ma, is that you?’’ I ask, pretending to be surprised.

‘’Why, you don’t remember your own mother?’’ She asks, raising an eyebrow.

Even at her age, she manages to pull out the best to stand out in crowds. Her face is clear of makeup but her natural beauty would always show through, knowing that she does different treatments to ensure her skin’s health. Not just that but her fashion sense, it’s quite a surprise that the woman in front of me is even fifty.

‘’Ha ha ha, that’s . . . not true.’’ I blink a few times, taking a few steps closer towards her. ‘’Why are you here, ma?’’ I ask.

‘’I want to see my son and grandson. Is that a fault here in New York?’’ She looks around the hotel lobby, ‘’Besides, the last time you visited me in Paris was Christmas last year.’’

‘’I’ve been busy with work,’’ I respond.

‘’Don’t remind me,’’

‘’Let’s have lunch then,’’ I give her my widest smile before grabbing onto her forearm and making our way towards the car—wanting to head straight towards her favourite restaurant here in New York and sending her straight back to the airport. Well, that’s the main plan . . . hoping it might work.

As soon as we’ve arrived at the restaurant, we head towards the back—the exact same spot where we used to sit years ago before both of my parents decided to move to Paris, my father’s hometown. He was born and raised there.

‘’How are you?’’ She asks, her dark blue eyes piercing into my eyes.

‘’The same as usual. You, ma?’’

She frowns, ‘’The same as usual? Do you still get panic attacks like you used to?’’ Completely ignoring my question, it feels as if she’s more attracted to my health than her own.

‘’Not as frequent but yes.’’ I clear my throat, leaning back on the seat before sighing. ‘’What do you expect? The pills don’t make them go away, ma. They just ease and make them less,’’

‘’I should’ve known that woman was good for nothing. If it wasn’t for her—‘’

I cut her off, ‘’—it’s all in the past. I don’t want to remember whatever she did to me.’’

‘’Yet, you don’t hate her.’’ She says.

Hate. Such a strong word which held a strong meaning as well. Hating someone can lead to all sorts of negativity and it all starts with something we both never expect but my mother’s right, I don’t hate her. I want to hate her but I can’t.

‘’I used to love her. I can’t just hate her,’’ I breathe out, reminded back of the memories and all the little things we used to do. ‘’Besides, I don’t want to make things bad between us. It’s good to stay casual,’’ I add.

She scoffs, ‘’She was the one who started making things bad between you two. You didn’t do anything wrong and as soon as she left, you started having anxiety attacks. You’re not the same as you used to be,’’

‘’Ma, come on.’’

‘’What? I’m not saying anything wrong,’’

‘’She didn’t leave. I did,’’ I state.

‘’But, she was the one who hurt you. She was the one who made you like this—you don’t smile as often, you take pills to coop for god’s sake, you pretend as if you’re okay when I know that you spend a long ass time in the bathroom just because your hands shake and your heart’s about to burst.’’ She replies, her eyes are almost red in tears and it takes me awhile to understand from her point of view.

‘’It wasn’t just her fault. People don’t cheat for nothing, ma. I was wrong somehow in our marriage and it affected her, that’s why she reacted that way. I was drowning myself in work and I was rarely home. What did you expect when I used to be there for her before we got married?’’

‘’That’s not a reason to cheat!’’ She says, causing her to lower her voice as soon as she realise that a few people have turned to look at us. Even the waiter seems to hesitate on whether he should come and take our order or just stay at his spot.

I sigh, ‘’You came all the way from Paris to talk about my mental health and my ex-wife whom I divorced five years ago?’’

Her eyes meet mine for a few seconds, ‘’No. I just can’t help it I feel a lot of anger towards her,’’

‘’She’s not here, ma. She’s living her life out there with someone else and she’s not going to even come back here. You just have to move on,’’ I reply.

‘’You shouldn’t have married her. That’s why I was so against it but you were young and you weren’t thinking straight. You didn’t think of the consequences, you just thought you two were going to last forever because at the time you were in love.’’ She wipes away the fallen tears on her cheeks before regaining her composure.

‘’I don’t regret it,’’ I mutter.

‘’What?’’

‘’Because if I didn’t marry her, I wouldn’t have Brody in my life. That’s one good thing from loving her,’’ I look away, calling the waiter to take our order while my mother takes her time to calm herself.

Some might say she’s overreacting but she’s just awfully worried. She worries a lot about my health especially my mental health because she knows how bad it can affect my life—she was there when the worst happened and honestly, she knew better than anyone else. I won’t want to let her feel pressured or obligated to be there for me, it’s just what she wants to do. As a mother. As my ma.

‘’Can we not talk about this, ma?’’

‘’Okay, you’re right. Let’s stop,’’ She replies.

‘’I just need a minute,’’ I sigh before making my way towards the restroom, trying to control my breathing as I feel my heart starting to beat fast due to my sudden panic attack. It’s not because of the conversation we just had but the memories clouded my vision.

My hands begin to shake as I stare at my own reflection in the mirror; on the outside, you can barely expect someone like me to suffer with anxiety on his daily life. If it is too obvious, Kenna and Aidan might’ve noticed but no. Maybe, I’m just too good at hiding it—who knows?

‘’It’s not happening. It’s not happening,’’ I breathe.

I stare onto my wrist watch and begin counting until the clock strikes exactly ‘1:00’ o’clock from ‘12:55’ as I feel my heart starting to slow down. ''You're good, you're good, you made it this far. You're doing fine,'' I mutter under my breath as I lean down onto the sink before looking up at the mirror once more, reassuring myself.

''Did you order?'' I ask with a smile plastered on my face as I take a seat, looking at my mother.

''Are you alright?'' She asks, ignoring my question.

My eyes meet hers for a few short seconds before smiling once more, ''Yes. I'm fine,''

We end up enjoying our lunch together after all, without talking about the past, my divorce or even my mental health but actually talk about the progresses we made, the obstacles we've overcame and even the good stuff that has been happening. We can't ignore the smile creeping up our faces as we talk and being reminded of the good things; my father's doing great himself and even better than before. He used to be stressed out about work but ever since he trusted me in handling our hotel chains, he's much more content

''Mr. Belrose! Mr. Belrose!'' I look up at my assistant who seems to have been running around the hotel as he makes his way towards me, not even giving me space after having lunch with my mother.

''Just the person I can never escape. What is it, Dion?'' I ask, heading straight towards the elevator without paying a second glance at him. Besides, he needs a moment to catch his breath from all that running—it shows just how much cardio he needs in his life than just spending time on his phone, scrolling through pictures on this social media . . . application called Instagram.

''You're not going to believe this,'' He breathes.

''I've learned to expect the unexpected. What is it, Dion?'' I turn to look at him, seeing him scrolling through his phone.

''We're going to London!'' He exclaims, excitingly.