Chapter 33: Intimacy Abundant

Maryanne is curled up in a heap of blankets, watching The Nightmare Before Christmas. This is where Max finds her after laying Riley down for bed. She pretends as though she does not see him entering the theatre room. The movie has just begun and Maryanne listens to his steps descending the aisle almost in time with the opening song.
“Isn’t this a Halloween movie?” Max begins to chuckle, lightening the air. He stands near her, his arms folded as he watches the moving pictures.
“It’s the perfect movie for Christmas too.” She attempts a smile only glancing at Max for a moment. When his gaze turns back toward her, though, she quickly averts her eyes back to the screen.
He moves to sit next to Maryanne, watching the movie silently.
After a while he says, “I want to apologize for earlier. You were right. I should have taken into consideration your feelings. I knew you wouldn’t like me spending so much. I was only thinking about your safety. Ideally, I want to have a bodyguard assigned to you, but I know that you want to prove yourself. I admire that. It’s why I decided to pay for the defense classes. It’s not just about Riley. I worry for your safety as well. I only want you unharmed.”
Emotions war in Maryanne’s chest, fighting for dominance, “I’m sorry that I cause you so much worry. I know I have been a burden on you. I also know that I have judged you just because you have money, and I am sorry.” She knows that she is not strong enough if Caroline comes back again. She should understand that he is trying to respect her wishes and that he could’ve easily assigned her a bodyguard without her approval, but he decided to honor what she wanted.
“I wish I could’ve given you a better Christmas.”
“It’s been truly wonderful, don’t worry. Just spending the day with you both, whether arguing or not, is still perfect.”
Max pushes a strand of her hair back behind her ear, brushing his fingers across her jaw. “I’m really glad I have been able to spend it with you as well.”
Maryanne makes note of him specifically saying it about her. Her stomach flips and she is unable to keep eye contact with him for long.
Max moves, almost like he shivers, and he looks up in the air, “Did you turn down the heat in here?”
She smiles, “Yes, I like cuddling up in warm blankets.” As though to prove it, she tightens her grip on the blankets and snuggles down deeper within.
Max’s gaze softens as he watches her, his own lips smiling. He shifts his gaze back to the screen. After a moment he shivers once more.
Maryanne says, without thinking and before she can stop herself, “Do you want to share?”
In a second Max has locked their eyes, his own wide with shock, “Are you sure?”
Not realizing until it is too late what she has even suggested, she tries to reason, “Well if you’re staying here, you’re going to freeze.” Her heart catches in her throat, almost wishing he would decline her offer. She is not sure if she can handle being in such close quarters with him.
“Okay,” he almost whispers, his eyes now hooded over.
Maryanne tries to calm her heart as Max shifts closer to her, his arm brushing her own as he delves within the blankets. His skin is cold to the touch and Maryanne shivers. It heats up her chest and she is unable to even look at him, her entire body tense.
“Oh, I’m sorry, here, maybe this will work better.” Max reaches around and brings Maryanne in closer, holding her against his side.
Maryanne leans her head against his shoulder. She isn’t sure if the pounding is his heartbeat, or her own. Her entire body is hot and on edge at their close proximity. She brings her own arm around, slinging it across his waist as she pretends to be watching the movie.
Max shifts slightly, bringing her hand up higher on his side. The realization hits Maryanne hard, but she pretends not to notice.
“I think Riley really enjoyed today.”
Max’s voice trembles through every nerve of Maryanne’s body causing a tension that buds in the pit of her stomach. She inhales a shaky breath, “That’s great. She really enjoyed having you sled down the hill with her.”
“I’m glad she forced me to do it,” he chuckles.
Maryanne remembers a few hours earlier when they were all outside. Although they had just had their fight, they both continued their day, making sure that Riley was happy. Max sat with the girl as they slid down the hill near the house. Riley was laughing the entire time, her little face just one big grin. Maryanne remembers Max screaming when he went down alone as the sled went faster than expected and he almost biffed it at the bottom.
“I really do enjoy spending time with you.”
Maryanne is unable to stop herself from uttering the words. She presses her lips together and remains silent. She does not want to say more than she should. If she changes things now, it might make it more difficult down the road.
Max does not reply, but instead brings his other hand up and slowly strokes her arm. The contact overwhelms her and causes Maryanne to almost gasp. She bites it down though.
Why is he acting so kind to her today? Especially after she yelled at him?
She cannot help it though, and she sighs, sinking further into his embrace.
They lay this way for a while, both silent. Sleep begins to take Maryanne over and she closes her eyes for a moment.
That’s when Max shatters her world in two.
“Maryanne, I still love you.”