Chapter 35

But soon he was regretting his words. Having her warm, luscious body against his the whole night without doing nothing was pure torture. He would make sure to make her pay for this.
"You are going to have many sleepless nights with me, princess." He whispered.
.
I am pregnant. I am pregnant, I am pregnant.
I kept chanting those words to myself the whole day. I could still not believe it, nor could Irene. She kept repeating that she was going to be a grandmother. Her whole face had lit up and I had never seen her so happy before.
"I need to tell Lothaire." She said excitedly. "I'll be back very soon." And then she was gone leaving me alone to figure out a way to tell Lucian.
Would he be happy to have a child in this mess? He had never said anything about wanting to have a child ever which made me a bit concerned. Somehow I felt that he wouldn't be thrilled.
I tried to imagine his reaction in my head several times but I couldn't figure what his expression would be like.
"Ylva. I am pregnant." I told her as she prepared me for the night.
Ylva stared at me through the mirror. Her eyes twinkled with both surprise and happiness.
"My Lady..." She exclaimed after she opened her mouth several times but not been able to say anything. "Can...I hug you....once?"
I blinked a few times in surprise. Ylva had never asked for a hug before. The only time she had hugged me was when she found out that I was alive. This would be the second time.
I stood up and embraced her, unable to help the smile that settled on my face. Ylva hugged me tightly and soon she began to sob.
"Are you crying?" I asked surprised.
She pulled back and wiped her tears away. "I have witnessed you grow. I have been with you since you were a baby. To see you have one of you own now makes me so...so" She began to cry again. "I am just so happy to have the chance to take care of your baby as well."
I wrapped my arms around her getting emotional myself. Ylva and Lydia had raised me like their own daughter. Without them, I wouldn't have been able to stay sane in my own home.
"I am glad to have you. I will need your help a lot since I know nothing about raising a child."
"Don't worry I am here for you, My Lady." She sobbed. "Oh God, I need to tell Lydia. She is going to be so happy. Have you told His Highness?"
"Not yet."
"He is going to be so thrilled, My Lady."
I wasn't sure about that.
She adjusted my hair one last time. "I'll leave you alone then, before His Highness comes. Have a good night, My lady."
"Goodnight," I said and she left singing in joy.
I sat down in front of the mirror again and stared at my reflection. I was probably worrying for nothing and Lucian was going to be as happy as I was to hear the news. But would he come tonight or was he too busy?
He had told me to call him anytime but I didn't want to disturb him?
I let out a sigh and stood up. Just as I was about to turn I saw Lucian's reflection in the mirror.
I turned to him with a smile. "I was waiting for you."
He crossed the distance between us and took my hand before kissing my knuckles. "My Queen, I am sorry I made you wait." He said charmingly.
I pulled my hand away. "Hmm...you need to apologize with actions, not words." I played along pretending to be displeased. Then I turned away from him and crossed my arms over my chest while a smile crept to my face at my own childishness.
Lucian wrapped his arms around me from behind. "What can I do to please My Queen? Shall I feed her with my hands? Or let her rest in my arms? Or shall I keep her up all night?"
"How about feeding me with your hands and then after keeping me up all night let me rest in your arms?"
Lucian chuckled. "You delight me, wife."
Despite having eaten, I let Lucian feed me fruits while sitting in our bed. He reached his hand out and I took a bite of the strawberry in his hand before he popped the rest into his mouth. Then he peeled a clementine and fed me a piece of it.
I had never eaten in a bed before and I could say that I found pleasure in it. Lucian seemed to enjoy himself too. I fed him some gr.a.p.es and we just looked at each other while we chewed the food.
I felt more at ease now once I saw his face. It felt as though I could tell him anything and not be afraid.
"Is everything going alright now?" I asked.
Lucian nodded. "There are a lot of things to do but everything is going accordingly. You don't need to worry."
"What happened to Pierre?"
I had been avoiding that question but now that he seemed relaxed I thought I should ask.
A muscle ticked in his jaw. "He is getting what he deserves."
From the look in his eyes, I didn't want to know what was happening to Pierre. I just hoped that Lucian wasn't hurting himself by hurting his brother. Even if Pierre wasn't his real brother Lucian had grown up believing so.
Lucian took a bite from his apple and chewed it grimly. Now he was in a bad mood.
"Shall we move on to the next task?" I asked to avert his attention from bad thoughts.
Lucian stopped chewing and swallowed slowly before turning his gaze to me. For a short moment, he seemed surprised but then a smug look crept on his face.
"What was the next task? Could you remind me, wife?"
I knew he was playing with me so I decided to give it back to him. I grabbed the fruit basket, climbed out of bed and put it on the table. Then I went back to bed removed my robe before laying down.
Lucian watched me curiously and a bit confused the whole time.
"The next task is to sleep, of course. I am tired." I said trying my best to maintain a serious expression.
The next thing that happened, I never expected. Lucian laughed out loud. It was a sound that I hadn't heard in a long time and it made my stomach flutter.
"You have really learned how to deal with me." He smiled then leaned down and placed a kiss on my forehead. "I am proud of you."
At that moment I felt more special than ever. I never had someone tell me they were proud of me so I got a bit emotional.
"I love you, Lucian." I blurted in my emotional state.
Pure joy washed over his face. "I love you too." He said and drew me into his arms. The only place I wanted to be forever and in that comfortable state I fell asleep.
When I woke up in the morning Lucian was already gone. I scolded myself for not telling him that I was pregnant. I knew I was worrying for nothing and that the news would probably make him very happy.
After getting dressed I decided to look for him immediately. Callum and Oliver were waiting outside the room as usual and started following me wherever I went. As I walked through the halls I cam across Lincoln.
"Lincoln."
"Good morning, Your Majesty." He greeted.
"Where is Lucian?"
"His Majesty is sitting in a meeting." He informed.
"Show me the way," I ordered.
With a nod, Lincoln led the way. We arrived at a place in the castle that I hadn't seen before. Suddenly a large door in the hall opened and a crowd of men began to exit the room. Imperial officers, generals, and soldiers chattered as they left.
"I believe the meeting has ended, Your Majesty," Lincoln spoke. "I'll inform His Majesty that you are here."
He made his way into the room and after a short while, he came back and gave me an indication that I could come in.
I walked into what seemed a large hall. A huge table took most of the grand space in the room and Lucian sat at the end of it, almost fifteen feet away. He seemed engrossed in the papers in his hands.
I cleared my throat to capture his attention.
Lucian put the papers down on the table and stood up before looking at me. "Did you already miss me, wife?" he smiled.
"Am I disturbing you?" I asked walking over to him.
"No. But you are distracting me much." He said letting his gaze rake my body.
I did nothing extra to prepare myself so that he found me distracting despite everything, made me confident.
Lucian tilted his head to one side and studied me even more closely. "Did you gain some weight?" He asked and my confidence went out the window.
"I am not sure," I mumbled.
How could I gain some weight when I have been eating nothing?
"You look..." His eyes darkened. I knew that gaze and it brought a fluttering feeling to my stomach. "You look enticing."
A blush crept to my face. He seemed to find me more attractive with some weight on.
Lucian put his hands on my h.i.p.s and drew me closer. "Why do you distract me so much?" He spoke in husky tones. Leaning down he brushed the hair away from my neck and kissed me softly.
"Lucian, someone might come in," I said nervously knowing that the door was open and Oliver and Callum were waiting outside.
He drew away from me. "Lincoln!" He called and the next moment Lincoln came inside.
"Your Majesty."
"Close the door and don't let anyone in."
Lincoln nodded and shut the door behind him as he left. As soon as the door closed Lucian grabbed my waist and lifted me up before sitting me down on the table. His hand slid under my dress touching me eagerly while his mouth nibbled at my neck. I let out a gasp, surprised by his action but also by how quick my body responded to his touch. I wrapped my arms instinctively and tilted my head back.
Lucian began to untie my dress as his lips searched mine. I m.o.a.ned into his mouth by the sudden heat of his kiss.
"Lucian, wait!" I was already breathless.
Lucian pulled back and watched me with a l.u.s.tful gaze. "I can't wait for too long so tell me."
My gaze fell on his mouth. His canines had elongated but this time they seemed longer and sharper than before
"Your teeth." I pointed.
"Yes. Many things changed since I came back to life." He explained.
It was strange that I found him sinfully beautiful with those teeth instead of being worried that they would cut his lips or mine.
"Does it hurt?" I wondered.
"No, it doesn't. But it itches badly and makes me want to bite something."
Did he want to bite me again? Was it normal? Looking at his teeth, it felt like it would hurt more than last time.
While thinking Lucian's gaze fell on my neck. The color of his eyes slowly changed to red and he looked away quickly.
"You wanted to say something?" He said looking everywhere but my neck. It looked like he was fighting himself.
"You want to bite me?" I breathed.
A muscle ticked in his jaw and his gaze darkened.
"God Hazel!" He hissed. "I don't know what you are doing to me. I don't know why I find you more beautiful for every day that passes by. I don't know why with every kiss you taste sweeter and with every touch, you feel better. You make me feel starved."
His words made my blood run hot.
"So yes, I do want to bite you." He added.
.
"So yes, I do want to bite you."
"Then do it." The fear that it would hurt suddenly disappeared.
Lucian stared at me surprised. "It might hurt." He warned.
Despite his warning, I bared my neck for him then wrapped my arms around his and tugged him closer. He hesitated for a while but then buried his face in the curve of my neck. His tongue swept slowly over my skin as if he wanted to savor the taste. I buried my fingers in his hair and tilted my head to the side giving him more access.
Lucian sucked and nipped at my neck until it ached and tingled with a strange sensation. It was almost as if I wanted to be bitten. As his teeth grazed my skin a sigh escaped my lips.
It was coming.
I held on to him and I shut my eyes tightly both in anticipation and nervousness. Lucian grabbed my hair and tilted my head back. Then he flicked his tongue over my neck one last time before his sharp teeth pierced into my skin.
I whimpered in pain, but it was quickly replaced scorching heat. A heat that inflamed the blood in my veins. A heat that made everything else fade away except the need to be taken. I became hot and needy, slowly getting lost in a raving l.u.s.t. But then suddenly I remembered. I was pregnant.
I shot my eyes open. "Lucian." I gasped.
I didn't know much about pregnancies but losing blood was probably not good for the child and from the wetness dripping down my neck I was concerned.
Lucian took his time, licking the blood away from my neck before pulling back. His lips were stained with my blood but with a swipe of his tongue, they were back to normal. Quickly I placed my hand on my neck to see if I was still bleeding, but I wasn't. I let out a sigh of relief then gazed at Lucian who was studying me carefully.
"What is wrong?" I asked.
"You tasted different this time and your pulse...it's strange but it's like you have two separate heartbeats." A frown settled on his face.
Two heartbeats? It took me a moment to digest what he said.
"Lucian...about that...I came here to actually tell that...I am pregnant."
Lucian stiffened and the room went quiet. I could hear my own heart race and it felt like forever before he said, "What...did you say?"
"I said you will become a father soon," I told him a bit louder and with more confidence.
Slowly, Lucian took a few steps back and then turned away.
Oh, God! He was not happy.
Hopping down from the table I went up to him. I put my hand lightly on his shoulder. "I understand if you are not happy."
Not having a good relationship with both his real father and the one he believed to be his father, could explain his reaction.
"Happy?" He turned to me carefully and grabbed my arms. "I am not happy Hazel. I am lucky. You make me the luckiest man on earth even though I don't deserve it."
I could see a mix of emotions in his eyes. Happiness, sadness, and worry.
"You deserve every bit of it," I assured. "And you will be an amazing father."
His hands slid up to my face, holding it gently. "Hazel, you are a blessing in my cursed existence."
I didn't know whether to be happy or sad by his words so I just leaned into him and kissed him. It was instinctively as if he would find comfort in my kiss. I hoped so at least. Lucian kissed me back, this time holding me gently in his arms while kissing me tenderly.
These kinds of moments made me want to never leave his arms.
Lucian spent the rest of the day by my side. To be more correctly glued to my side. He followed me everywhere, showering me with hugs, kisses, and praises. He kept telling everyone to take special care of me since I was pregnant, and he even arranged a special cook after finding out about my nausea and loss of appetite.
"You will serve my wife and only her. Make sure to especially find out what she likes and..." He kept rambling on to serve me healthy food and to serve on time or any time I feel like eating. He was even specific about telling the cook to not serve food that had a strong scent.
Later on the day, Lucian arranged for a midwife to come and educate the servants on pregnancy so that they could take better care of me. This caused the maids to swoon over Lucian.
"The King is so romantic. He takes such good care of his wife."
"He is so good looking and gentle."
"The Queen is so lucky. He even crowned her on his own coronation ceremony."
"Oh, I wish to find a man like that."
I stood outside the room where the maids received their lecture about pregnancy and listened to their chattering. They could not stop themselves from praising Lucian and squealing over him.
"Should I seduce him?" One maid whispered to the other.
At this Oliver scoffed and Callum's lips curved into a smirk.
"Shall I teach her a lesson?" Oliver whispered.
If I was the old me I would have waved it away but after getting myself a bit educated I learned that it could be good to sometimes let people know their place. "Bring her to my chamber," I ordered. Oliver nodded and went inside.
I turned my heels to go back to my room but all of a sudden the floor under my feet swayed. My hands instinctively searched for something to grab on to but I only grasped thin air and almost fell before I felt strong arms carrying me up.
"Excuse my behavior. I'll just take you back to your room." Callum spoke.
"Callum put me down I can walk on my own." I protested.
"His Majesty will not spare my life if I let you fall."
"You are my guard now. No one will hurt you without my permission." I told him.
At that, he just smiled.
Once we arrived at my chamber he put me gently on the bed. "Do you want me to call the midwife?"
I shook my head. "I am fine now."
Shortly after Oliver came with the maid. He held her by the arm and walked her inside. When they were close enough he put one hand on her shoulder and pushed her down on her knees.
I knew this maid. Jessica. The one who made my life into a living hell while working in the kitchen. Now she dared to speak that way.
"Jessica!"
"My Queen." She trembled and kept looking down at her hands.
"Do you know why you are here?" I asked.
She nodded.
"Why?"
"I...I wasn't nice...when... in the kitchen." She stuttered.
At least she remembered.
"That's not why you are here," I told her. "Do you find my husband attractive?"
At this, she looked up at me and shook her head violently. "I wouldn't dare, My Queen. I...I apologize if I said something." She rubbed her hands together as her forehead got lightly beaded with sweat.
"So you are saying my husband is not attractive?" I asked.
I wanted to torture her a bit.
Her eyes widened. "I wouldn't dare..."
"Do you find him attractive or not?" I cut her off.
"I...I..." She shut her eyes tightly as if it would make it all disappear. "He is..." Just when she was about to speak Lucian entered the room.
He paused when he took notice of the situation. "What is happening?" He asked.
I reached my hand out gesturing for him to come and sit next to me. Lucian took my hand with a frown and sat by my side. He looked around questioningly.
I turned to Jessica. "Jessica. His Majesty his here. Why don't you look at him and tell me if you find him attractive or not."
Jessica shook her head and looked down even further.
"It's an order," I said more sternly.
She lifted her head hesitantly, shaking and sweating even more. Her eyes darted around before she could look at Lucian.
"Now tell me. Do you find His Majesty attractive or not?" I asked.
She squinted her eyes and her face twisted in fear. For a short while, I felt bad for doing this but then I remembered how much my hands and feet would ache after washing the same clothes over and over again. How my skin would burn under the sun and how my head would throb from all the heat. It made me angry again.
Jessica nodded slowly.
"I didn't hear you," I said.
"His...His Majesty is attractive." She breathed looking at him in both fascination and fear.
"See, it wasn't so difficult," I told her with a smile. "You may leave now."
She turned her gaze to me, her eyes wide in confusion. She probably thought this was some king of trick and that I would kill her later. Maybe a few sleepless nights would make her think twice before saying inappropriate things or making someone's life difficult next time.
She stood up slowly her legs wobbling. I nodded for Oliver to help her go back since she had a hard time standing still. Oliver grabbed her arm to hold her steady and helped her leave. Callum followed them leaving us alone.
As soon as they were out of sight I turned to Lucian. "Was I too harsh?"
Lucian smiled and patted my head. "Well done." He said. "This way you punished her yet showed her that you can be merciful. Where did you learn this?" He asked.
"I read a few books," I told him proudly.
He kissed my hair. "I see you have been busy without me."
"Of course. I want to be someone worthy of you."
"You are more than worthy. I am the one not worthy of you." He said.
"Why? Because you couldn't protect me? Or because you couldn't remember me? Both those things could have been avoided if I had been less selfish and let you marry Klara. Instead, I let you die and while I was here crying over small things you were alone in that dark place dying over and over again. That you felt so guilty and lost your memory makes me feel even more guilty. I know you did your best to protect me but I can't say the same. So don't ever feel guilty or say that you are not worthy of me. I don't want you to hurt anymore. Just don't. Forget about torturing Pierre or anyone. Just be with me and let me make you happy."
I have had enough of him hurting. I knew very well I was the one lacking yet he was the one to always apologies. Why was he the one apologizing when he was the one who died protecting us?
"Hazel..." His voice cracked as if he was about to cry. Then he turned away as if he didn't want me to see him like that.
I stood up in front of where he sat and grabbed his face between my hands, making him look up at me. His eyes were wet with tears.
"Lucian. With me, you don't have to endure alone. Whether it's happiness or pain, share it with me." I said.
Lucian wrapped his arms around my waist and buried his face in my chest. His shoulders shook uncontrollably while he cried silently in my arms. I held him closer and stroke his hair until he released all of the pain and sorrow that he could. Then we lay in our bed, holding each other in silence.
"Thank you." He finally spoke while staring at the ceiling. He seemed embarressed to have cried like that.
Why did men feel embarressed for crying?
"For what?"
"For everything." He said.
"Then can I ask for one thing?
He turned to me. "Ask for anything."
"Can your mother stay here? I need her now that I am pregnant with a demon baby. No one knows what to do more than her."
That was actually just an excuse. I wanted Lucian to get closer to his mother. I know that he had been worried about here the few days that she was here. When she was uncousious I had found him several times in her room, sitting next to her bed waiting for her to wake up. He had made sure to bring physicians to look after her health but once she woke up he avoided her most of the time.
Except for one evening, when I had promised to walk Irene around the garden since she had difficulty walking alone. When I arrived I already found her getting help from Lucian. He lent her his arm and she held onto it tightly while he patiently walked her around the garden. I was happy to see the progress but also frustrated since none of them said anything.
"If that's what you, then she can stay here as long as she wants." He said.
Brother?!
It was a word Lucian hated to hear. Every time someone called him brother, they said it with distaste. It reminded him of his hateful brothers.
But today when Roshan called him brother, he detected no distaste in his tone. It was rather playful and for a short moment, Roshan felt like a brother.
Lucian shook his head in denial of his feelings. Why would Roshan feel like a brother? That man was annoying. Still, Lucian had to admit there was a sincerity in Roshan's eyes that made him feel cared for. Like an older brother caring for his younger one.
He shook his head again. Maybe he was being like this because he had always wished to be treated like a younger brother by his older ones. Brothers who showed him nothing but contempt.
He sighed frustrated.
"Is everything alright?" Hazel spoke next to him in a sleepy tone. She had her eyes closed in the darkness and was almost falling asleep.
"Yes. Everything is alright." He whispered.
She mumbled something and then fell asleep. Lucian studied her face in the darkness. He could still not believe that he was going to be a father. Of course, he was happy but he was also fearful. Now with witches and demons chasing him, he was afraid they would hurt Hazel and his child. That's why he finally decided to speak to his parents.
No, he wouldn't forgive them, but he was going to use them to protect his family. He was also going to work on learning his powers and becoming stronger.
Hazel turned back and forth next to him. She seemed to be having a bad dream. Lucian pulled her into his arms and eventually she calmed down and he fell asleep as well.
As usual, Lucian woke up early in the morning. Hazel was still asleep. Putting on some clothes he walked out to the garden. He loved early mornings when the sun hadn't risen completely yet, and the sky was painted with different shades of pink and orange. He liked the cold morning breeze and the sounds of birds singing. It was strange, he was drawn to the darkness yet enjoyed the colors of an early morning.
But who had come to disturb this peaceful moment?
"Your mother likes early mornings. She says it's the birth of a new day. After a long time of darkness, you can finally see the light. That's what she felt when she gave birth to you. That she finally saw the light and therefore she named you Lucian, meaning light."
Light? It was his mother who named him?
Lucian turned to his father. "I don't appreciate you coming here." He said.
"I thought you wanted to use me?"
Lucian clenched his jaw. "You owe me that at least. Don't you think?"
"I owe you more than that and I am here to give."
Then why didn't you appear earlier? Why didn't you give earlier? When I needed to.
Lucian wanted to ask all those questions but his father already knew what he was thinking. So if he wanted to give answers to his question he could, but he didn't.
"You can hate me all you want. I am not here to seek forgiveness." His father spoke. "I am here to be useful. I want to help you."
The thing was that Lucian wanted his father to seek forgiveness or at least explain himself. He didn't want to hate. He was tired of hating.
"Lucian." His father's tone softened which surprised him. "No explanation is good enough and I am not deserving of your forgiveness. I told you I wanted you dead. You are alive because of your mother."
Something felt strange. It was the feeling in which his father spoke. Lucian knew this feeling. He knew the familiar look in his father's eyes. He had seen that look a million times before, when he looked himself in the mirror.
His father was punishing himself by making Lucian hate him on purpose.
"You don't have to make me hate you. I already do." Lucian told him.
His father nodded.
"But I need you." He continued. "I want you to keep the demons away."
"You worry about learning your powers. I'll deal with the demons. No demons are going to hurt you or your family as long as I am here." His father assured.
"Good." Lucian turned his back to his father and went back inside. If his father was not going to explain himself or seek forgiveness, so be it.
Lucian dressed and prepared to leave for his meeting. He had a meeting with the tax minister and the finance minister.
"Your Majesty. If the poor pay less tax than the rich, the rich are going to stop supporting you." The tax minister advised.
"Tell me? The majority of people in this kingdom, are they poor or rich?"
"Poor, You Majesty."
"Good. What I need is the majority's support." Lucian said.
"But Your Majesty. The rich have power." The tax minister argued.
"Power in the form of capital is not what I need. I already have it. I need power in the form of community."
The tax minister and the finance minister looked at each other not understanding Lucian's logic, but they nodded in obedience.
"Just do your part. I'll deal with the rest." Lucian assured.
Once they left he proceeded with his other meeting. Before lunch, he had an appointment with Julian.
"Your Majesty. I see things are going well for you." Julian pointed.
"How are things going for you?" Lucian asked.
"Not very good. I have met a few covens and told them about you. They have a hard time believing that you are not siding with the demons, just because you are half-witch." Julian explained.
"Bring the leaders to me. I want to meet them."
Julian's eyes widened. "It's not safe to bring them here, Your Majesty."
"They won't dare to hurt me in my own home. Bring them to me." Lucian ordered.
Julian seemed concerned but nodded at last.
Speaking of witches Lucian thought of his mother. He had promised Hazel to tell her to stay so he went to the guest room where she has been staying. With the help of a spell, he learned from Julian he tried to summon her.