Chapter 56: Goodbye

Ana
The morning of Paolo's funeral arrived with a crushing weight. I opened my eyes, and the pain hit me with the same intensity as the day before. I sat up in bed, surrounded by photos and memories. Each picture of Paolo and me together was an open wound, a stab to the heart. Breathing was difficult, each breath a struggle against the sorrow consuming me.
Valeria entered my room, her face full of concern. She came over and sat beside me, gently taking my hand.
"Ana, it's time to get ready. The funeral is in a few hours."
"I don't know if I can do it, Valeria. I don't know if I have the strength to face this."
"I understand, but Paolo needs you to be there. You have to be strong for him, for yourself, and for the baby."
I nodded slowly, though every movement felt like a monumental effort. I got out of bed, my legs trembling. Valeria helped me get dressed, choosing a simple black dress that reflected the sadness I felt.
"I remember when Paolo gave you that bracelet," Valeria commented, pointing to the piece of jewelry on my wrist. "It was on your first date. You were so happy."
"Yes, it was one of the happiest days of my life. We thought we had a whole lifetime together."
"You can still remember those moments with love, Ana. No one can take that away from you."
I looked in the mirror, seeing the reflection of a broken woman. My face was pale, my eyes swollen from tears. But behind that sadness, I saw the strength that Paolo had always admired in me. I had to find that strength, I had to move forward.
Valeria helped me with my hair and lightly applied makeup, trying to hide the traces of my pain. Every time I looked in the mirror, images of Paolo and me together flooded my mind, a whirlwind of memories and emotions.
"Ana, I know this is hard, but you're not alone. We're all here to support you."
"Thank you, Valeria. I don't know what I would do without you."
We finished getting ready and went downstairs to the living room. The photos of Paolo and me were still there, each one a representation of our love and struggles together. I looked at them, letting the tears fall freely down my face.
At that moment, Dante and Uncle Marco arrived. Their faces were serious, their eyes reflecting the pain we all felt. Dante came over and took my hands.
“Ana, we’re ready to go whenever you are.”
“I don’t know how to face this, Dante. I don’t know if I can bear seeing him like this.”
“I know, Ana. But you have to do it. For him, for yourself. You need to say goodbye.”
I nodded, trying to find the strength to take that first step. Uncle Marco came over and hugged me tightly, his presence a source of comfort.
“We’re here with you, Ana. You’re not alone.”
We headed to the car that would take us to the funeral. The ride was silent, each of us lost in our own thoughts and memories. I looked out the window, watching the scenery blur by, everything seeming distant and hazy.
When we arrived at the funeral site, I felt my legs trembling again. Dante offered his arm, and I clung to it, using his strength to keep myself upright. We walked together toward the chapel, where Paolo’s body lay in a coffin.
The chapel was filled with family and friends, all dressed in black, all sharing in the pain of our loss. I approached the coffin, my hands trembling as I touched the cold wood.
“Paolo, I love you. I will always love you.”
The tears fell uncontrollably, and I collapsed to my knees, my body shaking with the intensity of my sobs. I felt Dante’s presence beside me, his hand on my shoulder, offering the support I desperately needed.
“We’re here, Ana. You’re not alone.”
I stood up slowly, my legs still shaky. I looked around, seeing the faces of those who had been part of our lives, sharing our struggles and victories. I went over to Valeria, who hugged me tightly.
“Ana, you’re stronger than you think. Paolo would be proud of you.”
“Thank you, Valeria. I’ll try to be strong, for him.”
We sat in the pews of the chapel, listening to the priest’s words, but my mind was far away, lost in memories of Paolo. I remembered our laughter, our arguments, our nights together. Each moment was a treasure, each memory a mix of pain and love.
The procession to the cemetery was a silent journey, each step a struggle against the tide of emotions overwhelming me. Paolo’s coffin moved slowly, carried by friends and family who shared my grief. I clung to Dante and Uncle Marco, feeling that their presence was the only thing keeping me from collapsing.
The cemetery was peaceful, surrounded by trees whose leaves whispered softly in the wind. The sun was beginning to set, casting long shadows over the green grass. We approached the spot where Paolo would be buried, and the weight of reality became unbearable. Each step felt like walking through a gloomy dream from which I couldn’t wake.
We stopped at the grave, and the coffin was lowered slowly. I watched every movement, every gesture, etching this final farewell into my memory. My hands trembled, and I felt the air grow heavier, making each breath more difficult.
The priest began to speak, but his words faded into the wind, barely audible to me. All I could hear was the beating of my own heart, an irregular rhythm reflecting the chaos of my thoughts and emotions.
Finally, I was asked to say a few words. I felt the gaze of everyone on me, full of compassion and shared sorrow. I approached the coffin, my heart pounding, and tried to find the right words to express what I felt.
“Paolo...” my voice quivered, and I took a moment to steady myself. “Today we are here to say goodbye to you, but for me, this isn’t a goodbye. It’s a see you later. Because I know, in some way, you’ll always be with me.”
I paused, fighting back the tears threatening to overflow.
“I met you when my life was full of shadows. But you... you brought light, hope, and love. Together we faced challenges, celebrated victories, and shared moments of happiness I had never known.”
I looked around, seeing the faces of those who shared our life.
“Paolo was not only a strong and brave leader. He was a man with a huge heart, a loyal friend, a passionate lover, and he would have been the best father our baby could ever have. His legacy isn’t just measured in power or influence but in the love and dedication he showed to all of us.”
The tears flowed freely now, and I made no effort to stop them.
“I promise you, Paolo, I will take care of our baby. I will go on with the strength you gave me. I will never forget you. Every day I will live remembering your smile, your voice, your love. You are and always will be a part of me.”
I placed a white rose on the coffin, the final symbol of my love and devotion.
“I love you, Paolo. I will always love you.”
I stepped back slowly, feeling each step taking me a little further from him, but with the firm resolve to honor his memory every day of my life. Valeria held me, her arms around my shoulders as the tears continued to fall.
The priest finished his speech, and the earth began to cover the coffin. The sound of the dirt hitting the wood was like a hammer to my heart, each thud an affirmation of the loss.
Dante and Uncle Marco stayed by my side, their somber faces reflecting the same pain. Finally, the coffin disappeared beneath the ground, and the grave was sealed. We stood there in silence, offering our final thoughts and prayers to Paolo.
The sun dipped below the horizon, and night began to fall. I felt my world darken along with it, but I also knew that, somehow, Paolo's light would continue to shine in my heart.
Dante helped me to my feet, and we walked away from the cemetery, leaving Paolo's body behind but carrying his spirit with us. I knew the days ahead would be difficult, that the path to healing would be long and arduous. But I also knew I wasn’t alone; I had Valeria, Dante, Uncle Marco, and everyone who had loved Paolo to support me.
As we walked away, I looked back once more at the grave, promising Paolo that I would live a life that honored his memory, that I would protect our child with everything I had, and that I would always carry his love in my heart.
“See you later, my love,” I whispered, feeling that even though Paolo was no longer physically with me, he would always be present in my life and in my heart.