Episode 59

Riccardo's POV.
I felt angry at myself, felt like I didn't deserve the air that went through my lungs right now. I did it again. I let my anger lose and now I'm on a verge of losing a woman I hoped to keep forever. Maybe I already lost her the instant I let her walk into that damn cab. I should've ran to her and stopped her. She should've just hit me. Why didn't she?
Of all the wrongs I've done, nothing ever weighed as heavy as this. I drove back to the apartment but she wasn't there. Where could she have gone? My head spun as thoughts occured to me, bizzar scenarios involving her in the worst kind of situations played in my head, blocking my vision of everywhere I looked.
I called her severally but she let them ring to voicemail. I was running out of options. Why did I have to do it again? Why did I have to be that man I'd promised her I'd never be? Stupid! I shouldn't have gone to that meeting, what was thinking? That we'd talk over manhattan and everything would be okay and then I can spend the rest of the month here with Ashley? Of course not!
I didn't know places where she could be. I didn't know how familiar she was with London but I knew one thing for sure. London was a huge and vast city, it's nearly impossible to find someone without a trace. This was one of those times when you wished you had a tracker on someone. I wished I could locate her and go to her.
By afternoon, I was getting worried. I hadn't heard a word from her. Then I let go of my fears and tried to think. Where would Ashley be? Where would she go to have some quiet time to herself? For the next several minutes I went from listing out names of places in my head until I finally came up with a bar and a mini eatery. Ashley wasn't a drinker except when she accompanied friends to drink she'd told me before. I knew she loved something secured, loved the mini type of restaurants.
I logged on my laptop and searched for the lists of mini eateries and restaurants within the range of the FiveWays skyscraper and our hotel. I was pointed to six different eateries. I searched each one after the other until I made up my mind on the one I thought she'd really be at. I hopped back into my car and drove off, speeding through the roads till I got to the restaurant.
The instant I stepped in, I looked straight up across the faces that sat at the tables. Then I spotted her. And my heart broke now.
Ashley is seated alone at the far back, and she'd abruptly looked up to see me as I walked in. Her face held a gaze I couldn't quite interpret but I just wanted to take her away from there, take her with me. I stalked towards her, ignoring the discomfort in her eyes as I leaned close to her.
"Come on," I grabbed hold of her wrist "let's go"
"I don't want to go anywhere with you Ric so please let go of my hand" she said calmly, trying to wiggle out of my grip. Ignoring her, I pulled her up and dragged her out of the place, ignoring the eyes watching as curiosity.
"Let me go!" She protests but I don't stop. I pinned her into my car and sat down myself. I started the car and drove out. I knew the right place to go.
She doesn't say a word to me and instead sat there with her lips pouted and her arms folded securely across her chest.
I drove us down to the popular Swan lake. The day seemed to be fastly going into night, the sky darkening with a thunderous threatening rain, giving the weather a beautiful look.
The area is a reserved wild life with a beach at the lower part. I drove to a stop beside the old wooded bride that led to the beach and stepped out. I walked over to the other side and pulled the door open.
"What are we doing here?" She asks, her attempts to frown promoting me to laugh. She was cute.
"Please get down, Ashley. Do I need to carry you?"
She watches me for a second before going down and I shut the door behind her.
"What is this place? What are we doing here?" She asks.
"You can ask me all you want, Ashley but with every answer I get to do one thing in return. So to your first question, this is a Swan lake. It was founded and designed by leonard Cohen the artist and now, it's the peak of every tourists. Many men proposed to their girlfriends at this lake." I watched her with amusement as she shifted uncomfortably and I smiled " now I'm gonna do one thing too"
Before she knew what was coming, I leaned into her and planted a firm kiss on her lips. I felt her stiffen beneath me and the feeling drove me crazy. Pulling away from her, I asked "now anymore questions? Cause I'd really love you to ask me more"
She licked her lips, eyes gazing up into mine before she replied "No"
"To your second question, I brought you here to apologise to you. I'm sorry, I was an idiot and I said too much. You have every right not to forgive me but. . . . . Please don't run off from me again."
She doesn't say anything and instead looked down.
"Ashley. . . "
"Nothing feels right, Ric" she said ,walking past me "none of this feels right. You're always gonna keep saying hurtful things to me whenever you're angry. I can't deal with that, Ric"
I turned to face her "I'm sorry, I deserve whatever you wanna do to me"
"I don't wanna do anything to you, Ric! Can't you see? You have to be able to recognize and understand what you wanna do once you meet victoria. Is it just about your anger?"
"You're right, Ashley. It isn't. I should've handled it more maturely. And I shouldn't have said all I said to you"
"Yes you shouldn't! If you didn't bring me here so I could be of help to you as your assistant then why did you bring me, Ric?"
"If you really wanna know the truth then I'll tell you Ashley," I moved closer to her "I didn't bring you here to be my assistant. I brought you here cause I wanted to spend some time with you, wanted to get to know you so much better cause there's always something to know about you. I brought you with me because you're an amazing woman. I brought you here so I could show you that I can be a better person for you and. . . . For everyone. But I fucked that up today didn't I? And no matter how I try to forgive myself, I just can't. Cause I let you down Ashley. Cause I didn't listen to you.
Ashley's POV.
I watched wide-eyed as the words left his mouth and sank deep inside of me. I wanted to embrace him. I'm mad at him when I love him so much and i love him when I hate him so much. What is this feeling? If this was love then it's not fair.
The clouds were getting darker and I could barely see his face anymore. When his hands grabbed hold of my forearms, it felt so right and I looked into his dark eyes. His touch made me shiver and his eyes mesmerized me. I wanted to yank him closer and kiss him, imagined myself doing that. I felt the rush of energy through me as he held on to me.
Slowly his hands dropped to my wrist and he caught my hand in his. Then he said "come on" yanking me towards the wooden bridge.
I followed him through it and down to the water bodies, our hands interlocked. The heat his hand radiated through my body was enough to keep the cold out. He warmed me up without even trying.
On the sands were ranches and inns for people who wanted to spend longer time here. He stopped once we got close enough to the waters where it could hit our feet. He let go of my hand and started to take off his suit. Seeing the confused look in my eyes, he gave me a sweet smile and said "I just wanna swim. Don't swim with me if you can"
I smiled back, my eyes dropping down from his eyes to his now bare chest as he pulled off his inner button down shirt. I wanted to reach down and pull off my dress too but his presence immobilized me and I just continued to stare at him. I felt his hand slowly hold my waist, the other caressing my face. His hands sent electric shocks to my face, causing the hairs in my arms and neck to stand. I watched his eyes as his face closed in on mine. Then i tilted my face upwards and reached for his kiss.
Every kiss felt like the first one and even better all the time. I didn't ever want it to end. His hand rubbed my waist, searched through the depths of my butt, pulling at my dress. I pressed my chest tight against him,felt the waters hit our legs again and I pulled him down into the water with me. He continued to kiss me passionately and I started to kiss back, harder, hungrily, demandingly. I felt starved of him.
We both broke apart to breathe, my lips trembling with excitement. His hands grabbed my waist and yanked me into his hard body. I reached over my shoulders and dropped my sleeves. He watched to my satisfaction as I pulled down my dress completely down to my bra and panties. The smile that crossed his lips was priceless as he watched my chest. After getting rid of my dress, he pulled me back into him and kissed me harder. I felt his hand grab my butt,yanked me into his lower area and I felt the bulge between his legs.
He wants me.
I started to kiss him even harder till my head spun. He snaked a hand behind my back and unhooked my bra. When he pulled it off me, I wanted to disappear all of a sudden. What if he didn't like what he saw? What if he wasn't satisfied with the size of my breasts. Even though I was a full cup size, the size many young women wished they were, I couldn't get past this feeling that he'd been with women with far bigger breasts and he'd probably touched too many to appreciate mine.
I found myself covering them with my hands as he pulled me into his chest and tried to kiss my neck. He stops, getting what I was doing and watched my eyes.
For what felt like forever, we stood there watching each other. Then he pulled my hands away and pulled my chest against his. I wanted to cower in embarrassment but he ran his hands down my back and over my butt, making our bodies one.
He looks down at me, plants a kiss on my forehead and said "you are one hundred percent beautiful, Ashley and even more. If what I feel pressing against me aren't the ideal kind of breasts then I don't know what is"
I felt my cheeks heat up and he chuckled in delight.
"You are beautiful, Baby, " he whispered into my ears "don't ever hide yourself from me."
I wrapped my hands around his back and welcomed his lips once again. He kissed me carefully and I kissed him back with more energy. I wanted to tell him that I loved him and that I wanted him right here and now but I had no courage to.