120: Ada's POV

After our bath adventures, I’d fallen asleep. I knew, even in sleep, that Darius had stayed with me. His presence was palpable, even with my eyes closed. When I awoke, the sun was low in the sky. My room was cascaded in deep hues of grays, blacks, and browns— shadows playing as the wind blew outside. I was resting my head on Darius’s chest, my arm and my leg thrown over his body. He had his arm resting on my back, his fingers playing with the hair on the back of my head.

In his other hand was a book. His eyes were scouring the pages. I watched as he flipped the page, his hands large enough to do so without having to set the book down. I bit my bottom lip and risked looking up at his face more directly.

Darius tilted his chin down, a smirk on his face, “Good evening, Ada.”

“Evening,” I said softly, stretching my body beside him.

After a few good seconds of satisfactory cat stretches, I rolled off of him. They’d put me in a silk shorts pajama set at some point. I also smelled of the rose-scented lotion that Gwynn kept at my bedside. I arched my eyebrow and padded toward the crackling fire.

Darius joined me moments later, clad in his own plaid pajama pants and plain white t-shirt. I plopped down on one of the couches, patting the seat beside me. With a chuckle, he sat beside me. I lay my legs across his lap, bringing our bodies close together. My elbow rested on the back of the couch, and my head rested on my hand. Darius was angled so that he was half-facing me and half-facing the coffee table. His hands immediately went to work kneading my calves.

I watched him. He was more relaxed than I’d seen him before we’d all gone to the Midnight Pack. Something about him signaled his contentedness. His hands worked my muscles, his gaze transfixed on the space before him. No tension resided in his shoulders, in his legs. His heart rate was slow and steady.

The words came falling from my lips before I could stop them, “Why did you marry her, Darius?”

His hands froze, his body straightening as he pivoted his upper body to look at me. For a moment, when I met his gaze, I was lost in fields of grape hyacinths again. Despite the rigidity in his body, the warmth was still in his eyes. In fact, it was almost as if he’d completely softened with my question.

“You know how we were talking about why you get the ice power from me?” his thumb skimmed over the bare skin of calves. I nodded, and he sighed, “Well, I was hurt. I acted out impulsively, and I dealt with the consequences of that with a part of myself I try and keep shoved down.”

I looked down at my lap, “You meant to hurt me.”

“I won’t deny that,” he whispered gently, “As much as it hurts to say that, I did mean to hurt you. I was jealous and hurt because I was excluded and stuck pretending to be engaged to a woman I hate,” Darius nodded slowly, “I did the illogical thing and tied myself to her. I fucked her so you could feel that pain I felt.”

“Did you know that I knew we were mates?” My voice was strangled as tears pricked my eyes.

Darius immediately shook his head, “No. I’d closed myself off from our bond in anger,” he gave my leg a small squeeze, “If I’d known, I never—”

“But you did,” I insisted, my voice still low, “Maybe not the first time. But you knew after that, and you still made those decisions. You married her knowing we were mates.”

“Yes, I did,” Darius sighed, “I can’t change that. I can’t deny it. I know what I did was wrong and horrible,” he patted my leg, “I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you if that’s what you need.”

I shook my head quickly, “I need to be able to let it go. This hurt, this uncertainty— it isn’t good for either of us.”

“I understand,” he nodded slowly, “What do we do?”

“This is the only thing I can think of,” I motioned at the two of us, “I really thought I was okay and that this wasn’t bothering me anymore. I just need to know that if I need to revisit it, I can.”

“Absolutely,” his hands returned to rubbing my calves.

“I also need to see her,” I lifted my chin and met his sharp gaze.

Darius narrowed his eyes and cocked his head to the side. I schooled my expression, keeping it flat. My admission had surprised me. Elizabeth wasn’t a person I’d given much thought to since they banished her to her rooms and nullified her and Darius’s marriage. But she was still there, in the back of my mind. Before, I was weak. In any interaction she and I had, she had the power. Now? I was ready to confront her for the way she treated me. Maybe if I started with her, I’d build up the confidence to eventually confront the others who had wronged me.

He cocked his head to the side, “Okay. I can arrange that.”

“Also,” I heaved a sigh and slumped forward slightly, “Now that Nik is awake, we need to get back to planning my coronation.”

His face broke out into a big grin, “Oh?”

I nodded and shoved his arm playfully, “We’ve been pushing it off for so many reasons, but if we want to be seen as a unified front,” I trailed off, shooting him a pointed look.

Darius’s smile faltered as he continued to look at me. He reached up, brushing his fingers against my cheek, “Are you sure you want this?”

My eyebrows furrowed, “What do you mean?”

“There’s a war going on,” he started, with a sigh, “There’s the whole prophecy thing. My brothers and I are each very different people,” he chuckled when I nodded in agreement, “Just... are you sure the throne is something you want?”

I considered what he was asking. He was offering me an out. We’d already marked each other, but we hadn’t completed the mating ceremony yet. That was something we would need to tie into my coronation. Technically, I still had room to reject them before my bonds with the Dominion were tied. Once we completed that ceremony, I would be linked to every wolf in this Dominion. Their lives would be my responsibility on top of every one of the things Darius had listed. And Darius was right.

He and his brothers were each very different people.

But there was something that he wasn’t considering. Something I’d shoved down a few times, and admitted only once or twice. I looked at him and grabbed his hand, squeezing it, “Of course, I’m sure. I love all three of you, and I’m not going anywhere.”