48

“Yes,” Ava said and looked at Ryder. “Losing his grandmother like that has made him, I guess you can call it sensitive, for when people don’t touch base with him. Especially if he knows there’s a risk involved. He just needs to know everyone is safe.” Ryder nodded. “After his grandmother died, he hit a rough spell again. She had left him her house, so he had somewhere to live. But she didn’t have much money, so he needed to work instead of going off to college,” Ava continued. “It was before I knew him, but I think he was depressed and vulnerable. That’s when he met Jonas. Jonas was older, almost twenty years older than Gabriel, and from what I have heard, he was just confident and took charge over situations. Gabriel fell hard for him, and Jonas took over parts of Gabriel’s life.” Ava paused again, even if this wasn’t her story, and the pain in it didn’t belong to her. It still affected her deeply. “It got to a point where Gabriel was more or less emotionally dependent on Jonas. Jonas would dictate what Gabriel should do and when, how he should act and dress, and most other things. Then Jonas started to ghost Gabriel. At first just for a day, then for a couple of days, and then it turned into a week or two. As Gabriel didn’t know what to do, he just stayed in bed those days. He didn’t even eat. If he made decisions on days like that, Jonas would taunt him mercilessly when he got back.” Ryder looked angry, like he would hunt Jonas down and hurt him. Ava felt secretly pleased with his reaction. It showed her she hadn’t been mistaken about the feelings he had for Gabriel. “When Gabriel was brave enough to question, why Jonas would disappear for days, Jonas gas lighted him and made him feel like it was his fault. It went on for almost a year before Gabriel finally broke free. He started going to college to get his degree and working in the hospital on the side. That was when we met. But it is a different story all together. Do you understand why I have told you this?” Ava asked. Ryder rubbed his hands over his face and nodded. He almost looked broken.

“By pulling back, I have poked at all the insecurity he has,” he said.

“I know you don’t mean to do it. That’s why I wanted you to know why it’s a bad idea. If you feel this is moving too fast, or if you feel like this wasn’t your thing, just tell him. He will understand. He’s an amazing person and he won’t be offended. But please, don’t string him along.”

“It’s not that I don’t like him, I do. I really, really, do,” Ryder said. “But after the shooting I just felt like he deserved better, someone that wouldn’t end up shot. And what if he got dragged into it?” Ryder confessed. Ava smiled at him and placed her hand on top of his.

“Gabriel knows what you do. He knows what can happen. And it isn’t just you. He is going to come work for Zane full time in a couple of weeks. I made sure he knew all the downsides of it. But he stepped right into this world. Part of it may be that me and you are here.” As she said that, Ryder blushed. “But Gabriel knows a good deal when he sees it,” she finished.

“I don’t want to lose him. And I don’t think I could let him go and then watch him date other men,” Ryder said.

“So tell him. Tell him you are attracted to him, but need to take things slow. Tell him about your doubts. Just talk to the man. And I would appreciate if you kept our little talk to yourself, or at least didn’t tell Gabriel about it.” Ava laughed a little nervously.

“Don’t you worry, Miss A. I won’t say a thing. I really appreciate you helping me like this.”

“Any time, Ryder.” Ava smiled.

“I think I need to call him. I think I have some grovelling to do,” Ryder said.

“You do that,” Ava said happily. She stayed in the library, eating the few cookies that were left and reading. She felt more relaxed than she had felt in days, and she wanted to enjoy it. Her phone buzzed and when she looked down, she saw it was a text from Zane.

Z: Are you done talking with my secretary?
A: Yes
Z: Come to my office.

Ava smiled and started gathering her things. She had missed Zane. It didn’t feel right not being around him. There was another buzz from her phone.

Z: And thank you for the cookies. They were nice.
A: You are welcome. I’m happy that you liked them. I’ll be right up.

When she walked into his office, he was frowning at his computer. She tried to be as quiet as possible, as she didn’t want to disturb him. But as she made her way to her chair, Zane reached out a hand in her direction. She took his hand, and he tugged her into his lap.

“Are you still upset with me?” he asked.

“No. I’m sorry I raised my voice. I wasn’t really upset with you. Well, maybe a little. But mostly I just don’t do well with having nothing to do. I get a little antsy,” she said, making herself comfortable. Zane looked at her as he tapped his fingers on the desk. “What?” she finally asked when his silent gaze got uncomfortable.

“How about I send you and Gabriel off to a spa day?” he asked.

“A spa day?”

“Yes, we own a spa. I have heard it’s a good one. How about you and Gabriel go there for the day and relax? That would get you out of the house and still be in a place where I feel I can keep you safe,” Zane told her.

“I would like that, but it sounds expensive.”

“How many times have I told you, Angel, you don’t need to pay attention to price tags.”

“Thank you, Zane, I would like that,” Ava said, giving Zane a kiss on the cheek.

“Oh no, angel. I want more than a chaste kiss,” he said with a grin, and pulled her in for a kiss. Ava spent the rest of the afternoon with Zane. They had dinner with Jax and Ryder. Ryder had a look that was halfway surprised, halfway happy. Ava took it as a good sign. They ended the day in the living room, playing video games. It was a new side of Zane and Jax for Ava to see. They reminded her of two ten-year-old boys. Ryder spent most of the evening with his nose in his phone with a grin on his face. When they decided it was time for bed, Zane dragged her into his bedroom, and he seemed almost desperate in the way he fucked her and then held her. Ava didn’t mind, she had the same need. But it made it hard for her to keep that wall around her heart up.