Chapter 19

“Please, calm down,” Benjamin whispered urgently. “I’m not here to hurt you. Don’t be afraid.” His eyes pleaded with her, and Jade realized if he had wanted to harm her, he would have done it by now. She swallowed hard, forcing her fear down, and let her body relax, melting into the mirror. Benjamin slowly released her mouth, dropping his arms to his sides.
“Hey,” he said softly, a small, apologetic smile forming on his lips, dimples faintly showing on his cheeks.
Jade almost smiled back, but stopped herself, mentally shaking off the pull she felt toward him. She couldn’t just forgive him. She forced herself to step around him, her movements stiff, and slid down the wall to sit on the floor. Memories surged—Benjamin licking his lips clean of her blood, the mix of desire and revulsion flashing across his face. Jade turned away from him, unsure of how to act, what to say, or even how to feel. Anger simmered, but so did sadness. And, no matter how much she tried to suppress it, she couldn’t deny the small spark of joy she felt seeing him again.
“Please, say something,” He whispered, kneeling beside her. His voice was barely audible, his posture tentative, as if he didn’t want to scare her away.
She looked at him—his palish skin, shaggy hair, and warm green eyes. He was dangerous, evil beneath it all, and she had to remind herself of that or risk falling deeper under his spell. She didn’t understand why, looking at him now, she couldn’t have fallen for someone like Aiden instead. It would have been so much easier. But here she was, wishing Benjamin would sit closer and tell her none of it was true.
“Why you?”
The words escaped her lips before she even realized she had spoken them. Hurt flashed across his eyes, and like a receding tide, the small flicker of joy she’d felt seeing him again drained away.
“I’m sorry,” Benjamin murmured standing, shaking his head as if scolding himself more than her.
“Wait.” She reached out, lightly touching his arm. It was enough to make him sit back down. “I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just... it would have been so much easier to hate you.” Her eyes dropped to the floor, counting the feathers and sequins scattered from the many costumes tried on in the tiny dressing room.
“I know,” he said quietly.
A heavy silence hung between them for several moments.
“What do you want?” Jade finally asked, daring to meet his gaze.
“I saw you and Aiden walking over, and I just had to talk to you,” he said softly. “I needed to explain what happened. You know I would never hurt you, right?” He searched her face for reassurance.
Jade nodded, hoping she truly believed it.
“I was going to tell you, “He continued. “I swear. But then Skye showed up, and things escalated so fast. We started fighting and before I knew it everything was spiraling out of control. And then...” He hesitated, a small grin tugging at the corner of his lips. “Then you almost killed me.”
Jade couldn’t help but smirk in return. “Sorry about that.”
“We’ll call it even,” Benjamin said, a flicker of hope softening his expression.
“Why, were you almost going to kill me?” she asked, her smile fading as the question weighed between them. The hope in his eyes vanished. He ran a hand through his hair, frustration etched on his face.
“That was their plan,” he admitted quietly.
Jade sucked in a sharp breath.
“But even before I met you, I never would have let them go through with it,” He added quickly, his words rushed, almost desperate. “I’m not like that, I swear. I don’t kill people I know you might not believe me, but it’s the truth.”
Jade stared at him, the turmoil inside her growing. She wanted to believe him, wanted to believe that beneath the danger and the secrets, there was still something good. But the doubt gnawed at her, lingering just out of reach.
She knew she shouldn’t, but somehow, she did believe him. She opened her mouth to say so but froze as Lacey’s voice called from the other side of the curtain.
“Are you okay, Jade?”
Crap. The dressing room wasn’t the ideal place for serious conversations.
“Yeah...” Jade fumbled for an excuse. “Just having a little trouble with the zipper. No big deal.”
“The boys are all in their costumes. Poke your head out.”
Jade glanced at Benjamin and stood up, carefully stepping over his outstretched legs. Remembering she was still wearing the skintight leather Catwoman suit. She felt Benjamin’s eyes on her, taking in her outfit, and felt self-conscious. A blush threatened to creep up her cheeks, and she tried to shake it off as she poked her head around the curtain.
She laughed at the sight of Sam dressed as Batman, Alex as Robin, and Aiden—naturally—as the Joker.
“Perfect,” she said, meeting Aiden’s gaze, ignoring the concern in his eyes.
“I know right? We’re going to make quite an entrance next week,” Lacey replied, already dressed back in her normal clothes, a shopping bag in hand. How long had Jade been in the dressing room?
“Okay, I’ll be out in a moment,” Jade called back, ducking her head behind the curtain. When she turned, she caught Benjamin quickly jerking his head away, as if he’d been caught watching her a little too closely.
“I have to go,” Jade said into the awkward silence, unsure of how she was going to change with him still in the room.
“Can we talk later?” Benjamin asked, his voice almost pleading. “Will you meet me somewhere? There are so many things I still want to say.”
Jade’s heart tugged toward him. She wanted to say yes. She wanted to let him explain everything—to return to those moments under the mistletoe to feel his lips against her but she knew she couldn’t let herself get pulled deeper into his world no matter how much she wanted to.
“I can’t,” she whispered, shaking her head.
Benjamin’s face fell, but he didn’t argue. He only nodded, his expression a mix of sadness and acceptance.
“I’m not ready,” Jade whispered, even as her heart screamed. “I don’t know if I ever will be I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, but that doesn’t change anything. What you are, what I am...” She let the thought hang in the air. There was still so much keeping them apart—so much she didn’t know about him and wasn’t sure she wanted to.
She turned away from him, her eyes drifting past the curtain where the boys were still comparing their costumes, oblivious to the turmoil in her head.
“Close your eyes,” she said, realizing she needed to change, and he still couldn’t leave. Benjamin obediently covered his eyes with his hands, but she noticed the slight gap between his fingers. “Come on, close them,” she added, half-exasperated, making him stand and turn to face the curtain while she changed behind his back.
The room was quiet as she hurriedly slipped back into her comfy jeans and oversized sweater, feeling relief as she freed herself from the skintight Catwoman suit. The air felt lighter, but her thoughts didn’t.
“Hide, okay?” She whispered. Benjamin nodded, his face unreadable. As she reached to pull the curtain aside, he quickly grabbed her hand, making her turn around.
“You looked hot, by the way,” he said, a soft grin playing on his lips. Jade smiled shyly, her heart betraying her. “See you at the dance,” he added with a wink before she quickly slipped out of the dressing room, trying to steady her racing heart.
Jade practically ran to the cash register, buying her costume with little fanfare, then told the group she’d wait outside. She found a bench, curled her knees up to her chest, and let her thoughts wander. What am I going to do? she wondered.
Benjamin drank her kinds blood for crying aloud. How was she still attracted to him? She couldn’t tell Aiden, maybe not even Lacey. Could she risk everything to see if she could love Benjamin?
Her fingers instinctively found the gold ring hanging around her neck. Did she have the courage? Was love enough to bridge the impossible gap between them?
“Penny for your thoughts?” Aiden’s voice startled her. He sat beside her, and she quickly let go of the necklace, guilt flashing through her.
Jade took a deep breath, realizing one thing with absolute clarity—she needed control. When Benjamin grabbed her, she could feel herself on the verge of exploding. If it had been Skye, Shaun, or Owen in that dressing room, she might have accidentally hurt—or killed—one of them. Or worse, they could have killed her.
She turned to Aiden, determination hardening in her chest. “I need to start training with you, don’t I?”
He stared at her thoughtfully, likely wondering what had brought this on. “Yeah, at some point, you need to start learning who you are and how to use your abilities to protect yourself.”
“Can at some point be like next week?” she asked, lifting her lashes to gauge his reaction.
“Whenever you want,” he said, his voice calm but serious.
She nodded, feeling the weight of her decision. “Let’s do it.”
“There’s one more thing I need to tell you...” Aiden hesitated. Jade waited, a nervous knot forming in her stomach. “I need to start sending reports back home. I haven’t told them anything important about you yet—not your powers. But if we start training, I’ll need to inform them—the council—about your abilities. I don’t think anything will change, at least for a few months. But I wanted to let you know.”
“Thanks,” Jade replied, her mind racing. Once he sent that report, there would be no going back. The Hierophant would know the full extent of her abilities, and soon, the entire Seraphina community would learn about her—about the danger she represented.
All the more reason to train, she thought. She had to prove to them and herself, that she had control, that they hadn’t made a mistake by protecting her all those years ago.
She nodded, letting Aiden know she understood, just as their friends finally caught up with them.
“Sorry, I got distracted,” Alex said sheepishly.
Lacey rolled her eyes. “He challenged a ten-year-old to a lightsaber duel. I swear, Alex, I hope you get into Yale because aside from us, those nerds will be the only ones who accept you.”
“Hey,” he started, then paused, as if realizing the truth in her words. “I sent in my early decision application. Did I tell you?”
They all congratulated him, and Jade silently prayed he would get in. They all loved Alex, but unlike Aiden who pretended to be childish, Alex seemed to live in his own little world.
A few hours later, Jade finally pushed open the front door of her home, exhausted from the day of shopping. She climbed the stairs to her room, happy to shed the stress of the past few days. A hot shower was the only thing on her mind.
As the steaming water poured over her, Jade let herself relax and the tension melted away. Wrapped in a soft towel, she padded back into her room, ready to collapse into bed when—
“What’s this?” Abby’s voice cut through the quiet, startling Jade.
She turned to see her little sister peeking out from under her bed, holding a piece of paper.
“What’s what?” Jade asked, pulling Abby onto her lap, loving that their relationship hadn’t changed despite everything. She still adored her little sister with all her heart, and no matter what happened, they would always be family.
Abby shoved the paper at her. “It’s pretty!” she said with a smile.
Jade took the paper, her breath catching when she saw the drawing. It was a sketch of her as Catwoman, and beneath it, written in neat handwriting, were the words, “Can’t wait.”
“Where did you find this?” Jade asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
“On the bed, silly!” Abby giggled, trying to grab the paper but Jade quickly pulled it out of reach. Benjamin had been here in her room.
Abby slipped off Jade’s lap, tugging on her arm. “Make me hot cocoa!” she demanded, her tone leaving no room for argument.
Jade laughed, trying to wriggle free while clutching her towel. “Let me get dressed first!”
Abby pouted but eventually let go of her arm and bolted downstairs. Jade stood still staring at the drawing, her mind swirling with questions she didn’t want to ask.
She walked over to her bookshelf, slipping the drawing into her jewelry box alongside Benjamin’s other sketches she’d hidden long ago.
With a deep breath, she pushed the thoughts aside and quickly dressed, knowing Abby wouldn’t wait much longer for her cocoa.