Take Two

**Nate's POV**
She didn't speak a word.
Not while we checked out. Not on the drive home. Not after unloading the boot.
I was going absolutely mad.
Of course, I knew there was a chance I'd run into old acquaintances while in London, especially since we were staying so damn close to where I grew up, but why Sophie? And why on the first fucking day here?
"I'm going to go unpack my suitcases. I'll be upstairs." Allie muttered, her face the same stoney void it was the night we met. The sight sent unwelcome shivers down my spine. I bloody hated it.
"Wait!" I called as she turned to leave, making her freeze. I had her attention, but what should I say? "Are you… mad at me?" A stupid thing to ask, sure, but I was lost. I was so afraid we were being set back by our run-in with Soph, and I couldn't have that. Not when we'd gotten so close.
"I'm... I don't know what I am." She said with a shrug, tugging on the hem of her shirt.
"Allie. I'm sorry that happened. I didn't mean for it-"
"Do you miss living here?" What? Her interruption caught me off guard, and I floundered for a bit trying to right myself. "I mean, if you had the option... Would you come back to live here? With… Sophie?"
What the bloody hell was she going on about?
"Of course not, Allie. Why would you ask that?" I stepped forward, but she stepped away. No. "Please, don't do this." She was pulling away, shutting down, I could feel it, and I needed to fix it, but I had no fucking clue how.
"Who was that girl?"
"Not important. You're the only girl that matters to me." I swore sincerely, trying for another step only for her to move again.
"That's avoiding the question, Nate."
"Okay, fine. Yes, we dated, okay? But that was years ago, Alexandra. I don't see why it matters."
"It matters because she's clearly not over you." She finally turned to face me, and my heart shattered when I saw weighty tears clinging to her lashes. She was crying! Why? I softened my voice, trying desperately to reach her through the darkness.
"That doesn't matter. You're my wife, Allie." I spoke so gently, so quietly, that I wondered if she heard me at all. Her eyes just kept staring, crystal blue daggers of apathy straight to my heart. Then, she finally spoke, and I was lost all over again.
"I'm not your wife."
What?
What did she mean by that? How could she say that?
Her tears spilled over, and with that, she turned to leave.
Chase her.
Leave her be.
She needs you.
She doesn't want you.
A tug-of-war that was yanking me in two different directions and I hadn't the slightest idea what to do. She was so cold. So dim that if it weren't for her tears, I'd think she hadn't felt at all.
Her tears. She was crying.
That's when it became clear.
Something was wrong, and it wasn't Sophie.
**Allie's POV**
I couldn't get away fast enough. I was exhausted, paranoid, afraid, disappointed...
Nate running into his ex wasn't the cause, I knew that. But it was the straw that broke the camel's back. Everything in my life seemed to be changing around me, and I was in free fall, vulnerable to wherever the wind blew me. I was used to not having control, but the difference was, my control had been shifted. From my father to Nate.
Of course, Nate didn't realize the role I'd given him. He thought we were partners, equal shareholders of our futures, and maybe we were. But I couldn't see it that way, because doing so would put the pressure back on me, and I was selfish. I had a responsibility now that I didn't have before.
I had a husband.
And seeing Sophie only forced me to acknowledge that he existed before me. Nate was a person. He had history, dreams, desires… that didn't revolve around me.
But none of that mattered anymore, because he didn't have a choice. I'd snared him, given him my burdens and my responsibilities to carry, forced him to live out the life my father had planned from the day I was born. It wasn't fair, to either of us.
A sudden thought flashed through me, granting me excruciating clarity.
Maybe that negative test was a sign. He said that I should make my own decisions, right? So maybe… maybe my first real self-made decision should be… to let him go.
"Alexandra, wait. Please." I felt his hand on mine halfway up the stairs. I hadn't even heard him coming.
"Please, Nate. I can't talk right now." I broke his hold, continuing up to our bedroom, but he didn't relent.
"No, I think we do need to talk. What was that about you not being my wife?" I flinched, but forced myself to the bed where I could unpack.
"This was all a contract-"
"Bullshit!" He swore, making me jump, the blouse in my hands tumbling back to the bed. Was he… mad? I turned to face him, just to catch a glimpse, but I wished I hadn't. He looked so pained, so betrayed. "I don't ever want to hear you say that again, understand?"
"Why? Maybe I'm tired of playing house with you!" I could feel myself bubbling over, one stressor away from shattering the lid that contained my raw emotion, leaving me vulnerable.
"We're not playing anything! Allie, talk to me! I need you to talk, I can't read your mind!"
"Leave me alone!"
"No! Just tell me what you want, damn it!"
I met his eyes through the haze of my tears, my chest heaving from our shouting match, but to my surprise... they were still warm. Golden. Glowing. Sincere.
Pleading.
"I want to terminate the contract." His brows raised, his lips parting slightly as he took in a pained breath, a breath I couldn't bear to see. But his hurt state of shock was temporary, being replaced almost immediately by a hardened gaze that made me queasy.
I did it. I broke him.
Just like I knew I would.
He straightened his shoulders, his mouth contorting into a tight line.
"Alright. If that's what you want." He stated blandly, but instead of walking away, he stepped forward. Once, twice, three times until he stood directly in front of me, trapping me against the bed while his eyes stayed zoned in on mine.
Then… he dropped to his knee.
Oh my God.
"Nate, get up." I begged, my voice weak, fragile, as he took my trembling hand in his.
"Allie. I didn't do this right the first time, so I'll try again."
"Nate, please."
"Allie, I'd like you to marry me." What the hell was he doing? "See, I know we didn't start off the best. Not much of a relationship if it's forced, right?" He gave me a weak smile, squeezing my left hand as his thumb traced over my rings, the rings he'd chosen for me. "But, now that the contract jig is up, we can do this properly." No. This was crazy. He couldn't. I tried to turn my head, a sorry attempt to hide my tears, but he moved it back with a gentle palm, swiping at them.
"I don't just want you because I'm forced to. And I'm not in New York because I'm trapped. I'm there, with you, because that's exactly where I want to be. I care about you, Allie. I love you." I was suffocating, choking on the emotion in his confession. The words I was too terrified to utter, and he said them confidently, not a hint of hesitation in his adoring gaze.
He meant them.
"I want a family with you. Hell, we already are one. At least, I thought so. Ha. Maybe I'm making a fool of myself, but what's it matter? I've never felt this way before, and I'm not going to let you turn your back on us. At least, not without telling you how I feel, first.
I know you're scared. You're hiding your troubles from me, but you don't have to. That's what I'm here for. And if I have troubles, then that's what you'll be there for, because that's how marriage works. We fight. We miscommunicate. We make up. We grow. We love eachother. That's what my mum taught me, Allie, so I'm not going to half-ass this. I want it to work. Not just work, but be fucking brilliant." He shifted to a full kneel, bringing my fingers to his lips as he made his final plea. "Let's do it again. Let's get married. Let's start over without the fine print, without pretending. I'll give you more than a title, if you'll let me. Please? Marry me?"
And just like that, the cracking lid vanished entirely, leaving me raw, unprotected, and right where I should be, with Nate.
Without a second wasted, I broke his grasp, bringing my hands to rest on either side of his gorgeously wonderful face.
"Okay. Let's do it. Let's get married. Let's love eachother."