17 - What can I do if I'm so fucking intense?

***POV NOAH***

She smiled at me.

And damn, why did my heart race like that?

Isabela placed one of her hands on my face and caressed it, making me close my eyes to feel her delicate touch. I barely noticed when she brought her face closer to mine and gave me a lingering kiss.

I knew what she wanted.

And I wanted it twice as much.

However, my mind was a mess. I couldn't focus on what I needed to focus on. Carefully, I pulled away from Isabela, who looked puzzled at me. I remained on top of her and just stopped the kiss, looking at her mouth, which always got swollen after our kisses. I loved seeing her like that in my bed.

Damn.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, analyzing my expressions.

“I'm scared,” I was honest. “You become distant out of nowhere. You push me away... I swear, I swear, I'm trying not to have expectations. But damn, you’re the first person who makes me feel this way. The first person I want to be close to and have close to me. The first one I’ve bared myself to, and no, I’m not talking about clothes. I’m afraid of giving myself too much, and you're leaving me. Of not being enough for you because, damn, you deserve the world. I’m intense. For me, it’s all or nothing. When we talk and resolve things, I think everything’s fine, then you come back and say you don’t want it anymore... I understand your reasons, but damn... What am I to you? Be honest with me! Is it okay if I get jealous of you? Is it okay to call you love?”

I said everything I was feeling, and that’s it. I wanted to kiss her and make love until I couldn’t get up tomorrow. But I was scared. I won’t lie. Afraid she’d give herself now, at the moment, in the heat of passion, and then regret it, or later say it was the last time.

What can I do if I’m so damn intense?

I’ve never been so exposed to anyone as I am with her.

Isabela opened her mouth several times to respond, but each time, she said nothing.

I took a deep breath, looked into her eyes, and got up. She even tried to hold my arm but without success.

“You’re confused,” I said, turning my back to her. “I don’t want to be with you like this.”

From a distance, it was clear she was confused, and I didn’t want to pressure her in any way.

She had just ended a 15-year relationship; she had never been with another man besides her husband... She went out to forget her damn problems and ended up in my bed. Furthermore, she certainly didn't think we’d meet again. I also never thought I’d see the woman who stirred something in me that night again. Something until then was unknown to me.

"Noah." I heard the bed creak and imagined she had gotten up. “I’m not confused.”

Her delicate hand closed around my arm; she pulled my arm, so I would turn to face her, and so I did. I faced her, who was looking at me apprehensively.

“Did your ex-husband's return mess with you?” I asked.

Isabela spent several good minutes just looking at me without answering or showing any reaction.

“No,” she answered just that and didn’t break our eye contact. I saw through her eyes that even she was surprised by her response. She laughed in disbelief.  “Wow, I thought seeing him would mess with me somehow, but I didn’t feel anything. Because the only thing that mattered to me at that moment was you. It was that we had arranged to meet, and I was crazy to see you.”

I suppressed the urge to smile and kept staring at her.

“I'm sorry for being so confused and insecure,” she said, holding out her hand for me to take. I looked at her outstretched hand and then back at her face. I took her hand and pulled her close to me, her body pressing against my chest. Her hair was over her face, and I lifted my right hand and brushed it away. She looked at me, and I returned her gaze. I ran my thumb over her cheek and brought my face close to hers, giving her a slow kiss that made me feel a chill in my stomach.

What the fuck?

I bit her lip slowly before breaking the kiss, running my finger over her lips to feel their softness. 

“You're breaking my lucidity!” I whispered. 

"I promise I'll try not to be like that." She bit her lip and looked away, perhaps searching for the right word to use. "Voluble. Indecisive..."

"I just want you to be honest with me."

"We can keep seeing each other, but without falling in love, please," she asked.

I smiled incredulously.

What a piece of shit.

What would she think if I said I thought I was?

You'll think I'm crazy and emotional.

"I find it hard not to fall in love with you."

"Noah!" She scolded me when I kissed her neck.

"Okay, I'll try not to fall in love with you."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Can we kill the longing now?" She asked in a low voice, and it was very sexy!

I smiled at her and held her face even tighter, bringing it closer to mine.

"Did you miss me?" I asked, brushing my nose across hers and almost touching my mouth to hers. She closed her eyes and nodded, gasping for breath. "Tell me, my love."

She opened her eyes quickly at "my love". 

“I missed her.”

My heart overflowed with euphoria. 

“I missed you too,” I kissed her chin and took a long whiff of her neck. I loved this woman's perfume. 

We weren't far from the bed; two steps, and we'd be there. 

“Jump,”

Isabela looked at me strangely, as if I were crazy.

“What?” She asked without understanding. 

“Jump on me,” I asked once more. 

Isabela continued to look doubtful and think I was crazy, but this time she didn't question it, and I was startled when she jumped up without warning. I held her tight, putting my arms under her hot ass. I took two steps forward and reached the edge of the bed. 

I ran my right hand up her ass, squeezed, and slapped it lightly. Just a warm-up. I kept running my hands up her back until I reached one of my favorite places. Her neck.

It's hard for me to say which part I like best about her. I like everything. I'm fascinated and obsessed by everything. Every bit of her.

I squeezed her neck slowly and began a kiss—a hot kiss. We were desperate. Our tongues fought for space, and I could taste her delicious strawberry breath. I'm sure she sucked on some strawberry gum before she got here. 

She tried to pull away to catch her breath, but did you let her? Yeah, me neither. I continued kissing desperately. I didn't want to stop kissing her. 

"Noah," she said between kisses, out of breath.

I pulled away against my will and looked at her beautiful face. She was red. 

Beautiful. Perfect. 

“Are you going to spend the night with me?” I asked, running my hand down her back now.

“Um, why?” She wanted to know. 

“I want to know if there's enough time for me to do everything I want with you.”

She held her breath and looked at me with her eyes shining.

“I'm going to spend the night with you.”

It was the only thing she said, and she didn't even have time to say anything else, because I looked like a hungry wolf. 

I threw her on the bed, and she was breathing hard. Her chest rose and fell. I watched the woman lying on the bed, my gaze roaming over every second of her body. I wanted to imprint it on my mind. 

I took off my shirt and threw it somewhere in the room. She followed my movements but didn't say anything. I kneeled on the floor and pulled her legs apart, bringing her body to the edge of the bed. She was dressed only in black lace panties. This time, I wanted to see her completely naked, so I pulled her panties down hard, tearing the fabric. 

“I like her.”

“I'll give you as many as you want.”

I looked down at her exposed pussy, shaved and pink.

"Stop looking at me like that," she said, embarrassed.

"Stop being hot," I replied, drawing a laugh from her.

I held her legs open, leaving her exposed to me. I had the privilege of seeing her pussy, which was dripping with moisture.

"You're wet like that just from my kiss," I commented, moving my fingers from her ankles to her legs and thighs until I reached paradise.

"You make me like this," she said, making my ego soar, needless to say.

"Fuck," I grunted as I slipped my finger into her moist pussy. She was so wet that I could slip in and out easily. My member was throbbing inside my underwear, and I wanted to be inside her immediately.