43 - “You’re my downfall. My ruin. My chaos.

***POV NOAH***

For the first time in a long while, she held my gaze without looking away. That small gesture gave me hope—maybe there’s still a chance for us.
We inevitably see each other; our lives are public. There are always news stories about us, and she’s constantly assigned to cover my team. There’s no avoiding it, and honestly, I’m grateful for that.
“Noah, are you listening?” Luana asked, stepping in front of me.
I couldn’t help it. My eyes wouldn’t leave her—it was like she was a magnet. Right now, she was hurriedly removing the mic wires, looking like she couldn’t wait to leave.
I squeezed the water bottle in my hands. I had promised myself I wouldn’t chase after her anymore and wouldn’t humiliate myself for her again, but damn it, something inside me screamed to try one more time.
I handed my water bottle to Luana and took two steps forward.
“Where are you going?” she grabbed my arm, making me stop and turn to face her.
“I need to talk to her.”
“No, you don’t.” Luana was firm. “Are you going to humiliate yourself again?”
“You don’t know even 1% of what we had or what we’ve been through, Luana. I’ll be back.”
She tried to argue, but this time, I didn’t stop. I kept walking briskly toward the reporters’ parking lot. I saw her unlocking her car, opening the door, and getting inside. I quickened my pace to catch her before she left.
Reaching her car, I took a deep breath, opened the door, and got in. Turning to face her, I saw the surprise in her eyes.
“Noah,” she looked around nervously, checking if anyone had seen us. “What are you doing here?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted, exhaling deeply. My heart was pounding just to be near her again. “I honestly don’t know, Isabela.” I ran a hand through my hair, nervous. “I promised myself I’d never chase after you again, and yet, here I am. Once more. I couldn’t help it when I saw you again. I miss you. I miss us. I just…”
I swallowed my words as she caught me off guard, pulling me by my shirt and kissing me.
Our kiss started slow, as if we both wanted to savor every moment. I wanted to soak in every second. I missed the way her lips felt against mine and the taste of her kiss.
My hand moved to her neck, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss. Our lips fit perfectly together. She was made to be kissed by me.
Breathless. Out of air.
She tried to pull back to catch her breath, but I didn’t let go. My hands held her neck, keeping her close, our lips almost touching again. I kept my eyes shut, afraid to open them, and realized this was all just a figment of my imagination. I caressed her neck, convincing myself this was real.
“Noah,” her soft voice called me, “You can open your eyes now.” There was a playful tone to her voice.
I shook my head.
“I can’t,” I answered, smiling.
“Why not?” she asked, of course.
“I’m afraid if I open them, this will all turn out to be a mirage.”
“It’s not a mirage. It’s real. I’m here.” Her voice was as sweet as ever.
It’s hard to explain everything I feel when it comes to her. Isabela is my downfall.
Slowly, I opened my eyes to find her face inches from mine. My heart raced even faster. For a second, I thought I might have a heart attack from how hard it was pounding.
“I missed you so much,” I admitted.
“I missed you too,” she replied, surprising me. Her eyes stayed locked on mine, and I knew she was being honest. I knew her well enough to tell.
“I don’t ever want to let you go again,” I said, caressing her face and memorizing every detail to keep with me forever.
“We need to talk,” she said, her tone serious as she tried to pull back, but I didn’t let her. I kept her face in my hands. I wasn’t letting her go anytime soon.
“We need to catch up first,” I said, kissing her again. I tried to deepen the kiss, but she didn’t let it linger. “What’s wrong, my perdition?” I asked.
“My perdition?” She raised an eyebrow.
“You’re my downfall. My ruin. My chaos. And yet, you’re still the best part of me. You’re my everything—where I lose myself, where I find myself, where I want to be. You’re my unrealized dream, my continuation with a happy ending. You’re my deepest desire, my unwavering presence. You’re my certainty of true love. You’re my wildest act, my absence that feels so present. You’re here in my heart, even when I don’t see you with my eyes. And I’m so lucky to have done something right to win you. You’re the rush I try to forget so I can love you. But I’ll wait for you—it’s worth every lonely day I’ve endured.”
I poured my heart out, not looking away from her for even a second. She stayed quiet for a moment, taking in my words.
“You’re my downfall too,” she finally admitted. “Ever since you came into my life, I’ve been doing things I never imagined—like making out in a car in a training facility parking lot,” she added with a nervous laugh.
“In the end, we’re crazy about each other. We have this amazing connection, and I’ve never felt this way with anyone else. I need to ease this ache in my chest from missing you so much,” I said, placing her hand over my heart.
“Wow, your heart’s racing,” she observed, studying my face.
“You’re the reason.”
She looked away, shy. That side of her drove me wild.
“Should we get out of here now?” I asked.
“Let’s go.”
As she shifted to adjust her seat and start the car, I felt a pang of longing from her warmth leaving me.
“I drove to practice today,” I said, not wanting to be in separate cars. I won’t lie—I was afraid of losing her again if we were apart.
“Will you follow me?” she asked, looking at me.
I remembered Luana—I always gave her a ride home. Damn it.
“Where do you want to go?” I asked. “I need to take a quick detour to drop Luana off.”
I noticed Isabela fidgeting in her seat, clearly uncomfortable. She gripped the steering wheel with one hand, staring straight ahead.
“What’s wrong, beautiful?” I asked.
“Nothing. Go drop off your assistant,” she replied dryly. It was all over her face, though—her jealousy was loud and clear.
I tried not to laugh. I loved knowing she got jealous of me.
“There’s never been anything between me and her. She knows I’m hopelessly in love with you.” I felt the need to clarify to avoid future misunderstandings.
“She knows about me?”
“Yes.”
“But we agreed to keep it a secret,” she pointed out.
“We’ll talk about everything,” I said, exhaling deeply. “Let’s go together then,” I decided.
I didn’t want to fight with Isabela now that we were so close to reconciling.
“Don’t you have to take your assistant home?” she asked, her irritation barely concealed.
“You look beautiful when you’re jealous.”
“I’m not jealous,” she denied.
“You are.”
She looked at me, and I held her gaze—a silent battle between our eyes.
My phone rang—it was Luana. I answered, putting it on speaker.
“Noah?” her voice echoed in the car.
“Yes, Luana,” I replied, not taking my eyes off Isabela, who tried to act indifferent.
“I’ve sorted your entire schedule. Where are you? Your father’s looking for you, and I’m out of excuses…”
“Cancel all my appointments today. If my dad asks, tell him I had to take care of something outside.” I sighed. “Can you call a cab?”
There was silence for a few seconds.
“Luana?” I called her name.
“You’re with her, aren’t you?” she asked, and Isabela’s gaze burned into me.
“Yes, I am,” I admitted. I had no reason to lie.
“Alright. I’ll call a cab. I’ll talk to you tonight.”
“Bye,” I said, ending the call.
“Why did you tell your assistant about me?” Isabela asked, curious.
“Can we talk about it on the way?” I suggested.
Isabela nodded, turning the key in the ignition and driving out of the parking lot.