The maiden and the mother

Emma’s POV.

I open my eyes, a cerulean blue sky is overhead, I feel the hot sun on my flesh. I am reclined on a sunlounger on a secluded terrace, overlooking a swimming pool. Behind me is a small house, painted white with a red terracotta roof.

I close my eyes again, relaxing into the cushioned lounger, absorbing the heat of the sun through my skin, but I still feel chilled right to my very soul.

For long moments I lay there just being, enjoying the sun. Then memory returns.

I sit up suddenly. Fear flowing through me. Where am I? The last thing I remember is collapsing on a dark storm night, exposed to the elements and probably dying. My body battered and bruised from the assault and my escape.

I inspect myself. I am dressed in a black and white strappy sunny dress, my bare arms and legs are unmarked and tanned. I don’t feel any pain. I wiggle my wrist, all is good. I inhale deeply, no pain stabs my side.

I look round and seeing no one, I lift my skirt, and find instead of an unhealed hickie there is a tattoo of rapids being crossed by a wolf. Okay, that is a little strange. Why do I have a tattoo there, and why that subject?

So I think, I am healed and sitting on a sun lounger next to a pool in a warm climate, maybe the mediterranean? Life is good.

I lay back, closing my eyes again. I still feel cold, and I can’t remember how I got here, or what has happened in the intervening weeks, months or even years… Did I bang my head that night, or maybe I am having a Dallas moment, and it was all a dream… although I am not in the shower.

Dream, dream… oh my god I am in a dream I realise. I am dying of exposure on a hillside in Scotland and this is a dream… that is why I am still cold, at least I am protecting myself from the pain. If this is death it really isn’t so bad.

A musical laugh tinkles through the air… I sit up startled looking round, I know I am alone… but there is now another lounger next to mine, and it is occupied.

The woman laughing is barely more than a girl. She has black hair that reaches the middle of her back, and is marked by a silver streak. Her slender toned body is dressed in a black bikini which stands out against her milky white skin. She is the most radiant creature I have ever seen.

Then she looks at me and I am stunned… her eyes are silver…

‘Hello, who are you?’ I ask her.

‘I go by many names, but you can call me Selene,’ she replies.

‘Selene, Selene,’ I taste her name. ‘I feel I should know who you are but I don’t’

‘Don’t worry it will come to you’ she tells me. ‘Rest for now’

‘Is this death?’ I want to know.

‘Not yet’ is the response.

With that we both recline in the sun in a companionable silence.

A timeless period later the sun begins to set, although it gets no colder, and the moon rises. I open my eyes and get up, ready to retire, but the landscape has changed. The house, the terrace, the swimming pool are all gone, replaced by a concrete path leading into a forest. The leaves rustle, and in the distance I can hear the howling of wolves.

Ever since I met Peter there have been a lot of wolves in my dreams, I think to myself. I wonder if he will be here. A small hopeful smile lifts my lips.

Selene is now dressed in a deep black evening gown, split from floor to hip, covered with gems or beads, sparkling in the moonlight. She is at the edge of the treeline and beckons me. Where has the pool gone? And the loungers?

I follow Selene through the moonlit grove, to a pond. She is standing on a jetty overlooking the water with two of the biggest lupines I have ever seen. One dark and one light; yin and yang; balance.

‘Are you ready for answers, Emma?’ she asks. Fleetingly I wonder how she knows my name, I don’t remember telling her, but this is a dream so I just go with it. ‘We don’t have much time..’

She looks up and the moon is already more than halfway across the sky, somehow I know that our business must be concluded by moonset.

‘Who are you? What are you?’ I ask.

‘I am Selene, Moon Goddess,’ she continues. ‘Maiden..’

‘...Mother, Crone,’ I finish. ‘Well, I don't believe in deities. I am not under anyone's control.’

‘Correct, well sort of. You are not under my control, but I created the werewolves, and care for them and the other supernatural beings, so I can communicate with you thanks to your link to Peter’

‘There are other supernatural beings? Link to Peter?’
‘Yes, but the other supernaturals don’t relate to our current situation at the moment, and it would take to long to explain. When Peter marked you as his you became his family and part of the pack. A psychic link was formed; but you didn’t fully accept him, so the link was tenuous and the mark would not resolve. Now think back to just before the attack.’

I do as she says. It feels like something that happened eons ago, but I remember drinking coffee and looking out of my van. I remember peace settling over me, and a decision to go home. I recall hoping that Peter would still be there and that we could make it work. I peer deep into the memory and know that even if I didn’t admit it to myself at the time I accepted Peter and Braon.

‘Look.’ She gestures at the water. The full moon is reflected, turning the surface silver. The water begins to swirl, darkening and becoming a window.

I peer into the pool and see myself laying on a bed, in a bedroom I don’t recognise. It clearly isn’t a hospital room, but I am attached to a drip, hovering between life and death. In the corner a machine monitors my vital signs, beeping quietly to itself. I look like shit; drawn, with two black eyes and a split lip; unmoving in the bed.

Peter is sitting beside me holding my hand. His head is down, and he looks as if he is praying.

‘So Emma, you have a choice,’ Selene tells me. ‘Peace or pain… Death or life’

‘A choice?’

‘Yes… death and an end… or return to life and pain with no guarantees’

Put that way, why would I choose life, there has to be more to this than I realise.

‘What are the consequences of my decision?’ I ask.

‘That is a good question,’ Selene smiles sadly. ‘I was right about you. If you die, so do those who are missing, if you return to life there will be much pain, and no guarantee of a happily ever after for you, but a chance for them.’

‘The missing?’ I question. ‘They are children from my dream, aren’t they? Will I save them?’

‘You can, while you aren’t physically strong, but your will is. To rescue them will require much mental resilience’ is the blunt answer.

Comprehension dawns… ‘Your form is the maiden, I am the mother, but who is the crone?’

‘That is for you to discover if you live… so what do you choose?’

‘I’ll save the children?’ I ask again.

‘That is up to you… you can, but you can also choose not to… you won’t remember this, and I warn you the sacrifice required to save the pups maybe more than you are willing to make. If you abandon them they will be lost.’

Her voice drops to a whisper. A single silver tear like a drop of mercury rolls down her face. ‘I beg you to do what I can’t, save my children.’

Part of me wants to just call it a day. The chance to experience no more pain is very tempting; then a flashback from a previous dream intrudes… my Rosie, my granddaughter amongst the children… It doesn’t matter if she is or isn’t, all children are precious to me.

Suddenly my body starts to hurt… wounds start to appear starting from my poor abused feet.

‘It appears you have made your choice,’ Selene tells me.

Wounds reappear on my flesh, but even as the pain grows I look into her silver eyes and respond ‘Yes, there was only this choice for me. But if you have fucking played me, if I find out you have lied, I will find you wherever you might be… I will destroy the gates of Heaven and level Hell to find you. I will track you down wherever you might hide and then I will end you… I don’t care what kind of powers you think you have’

Selene nods, ‘I know and expect nothing less of you.’ The moon is setting behind her, our audience is over.

White hot pain explodes from my mate-mark and darkness engulfs me.