Chapter 18: In which she gets caught...nearly.

"Ugh! Who turned on the stupid lights!" I groaned as I tried to cover my eyes with the soft silk blanket.
And heard a groan from behind me.
"Aaaaaahhhhhhh!" I woke up screaming my lungs out, which caused the person next to me to jolt awake with me.
"Savannah! What the hell!" He said covering his ears.
"Nathan! What on God's green Earth are you doing in my house?" And then I looked around. "Why on God's green Earth am I in your house?!"
“Don’t you remember?” Nate spoke, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “Your red-head friend dropped you off last night, dead drunk.”
Crap! Crap! Crap! What on earth did I do this time?
Think Savannah! Think! I thought through a massive hangover. And then it all came back to me...
Me calling Nikki for a drink...me getting dead drunk...me spilling my guts out to her..."Aaaaaahhhhhhh!"
"Ouch! Now what?" Nate winced, covering his ears.
Well...I couldn't tell him the real reason, but...
"Nate...um...did we...you known..." I said pointing towards first him and then me; the sheets clutched to my chest, I pretended like I was too afraid to look down even though I could feel my clothes on me.
"Although the idea was very, very tempting," his eyes sparkled with mischief, "but I'm too much of a gentleman, that even after you practically jumped on me and started an intense make out session, I had to bodily pick you up and throw you in bed. But I wasn't gentlemanly enough to not sleep beside you when you held my hand and told me not to leave you."
His eyes held a certain kind of gentleness, dare I say, love, when he told me this. Then he intertwined our hands and brought it up to his lips, kissing the back of my hand.
The heat in his blue, blue eyes, it sent my insides on a roller coaster ride. My mind scrambled until I was lost in an endless ocean of electric blue. His dark hair was messy, and it kissed his forehead in that lazy way that reminded me of the boy he used to be, carefree, fun loving, full of spirit and simply gorgeous.
At that moment, when he lifted his head to lock his lips with mine in a blazing inferno of passion…that was when I made a decision.
Lying next to him a little while later, my head on his chest with his arms wrapped around me, lazing around like we didn't have a care in the world, and for this moment, we didn't. I drew pattern on his shirt covered chest as I finally spoke about a part of my life that even Samuel didn't know about.
"In college," I began, and instantly Nathan's entire attention was on me. "I started out as the goody-two-shoes-nerd that you knew, but then, I made a few friends....of the wrong kind. But for once in my life, I didn't seem to care."
Nate didn't interrupt, just gave me time to relive my story while quietly urging me to continue.
"It kinda felt right, you know, to bunk classes, to go partying all night, drinking...and drugs too sometimes." I sighed, remembering the high it had brought me, the temporary ecstasy that helped me forget about separation from my twin, my mother's painful death, my father's betrayal and everything else that came after. "I didn't sleep around, until one day, I got high and slept with one of the guys."
I felt Nate's hands tighten around me, but I continued. " I know I was too wasted to give consent and I should have gone to the cops, but I was an orphan nobody and his dad was some kind of shit I don’t even remember. I couldn't say he did anything wrong...in that stupor I had enjoyed what he did to me...but after that, the incident became my turning point. I stopped being friends with them and turned over a new leaf, but the outgoing personality stayed. I never took shit from anyone ever again. I did date other men, who cared about who I was, but I can say that I changed for the better.
“Sometimes, I look back at that time when I am about to take any rash decision and think things through. I don’t often tell people about my wild, rowdy days, but since you keep asking me how I changed so much…I thought you should know. I don’t regret anything, honestly. Everything that has happened in my life until now has made me the person I am…and I like this person I’ve become. I’m confident and a bit outspoken, but that’s who I am now and I like being me.”
“Yeah?” I could hear the smile in Nate’s voice. “Well, that makes two of us.”
I felt myself sigh in relief at his acceptance. It wasn’t like I needed it, but if the person you like accepts you wholeheartedly, it makes you feel relieved no matter what your principles are.
“I’m glad.” I told him. “But Samuel helped too."
…
Shit!
I hadn't meant to say that out loud. Shit! Shit! Triple fucking shit!
"Savannah...who's Samuel?"
Think, Savannah! Think, you stupid fool!
"A friend, from college...he was kinda like an older brother, you know....since he was a Senior and I had advanced classes..." I laughed nervously. “He was one of the people who warned me against the group I was mixing with.”
It wasn't a complete lie, but not the complete truth either. Samuel had helped me get over my depression, raised my spirit, but I didn't tell him the truth. But he had known anyway...twintuition, I guess.
"I see. Then I guess I'm thankful to him for taking care of you." Suddenly, he was hovering over me, his hands braced on either side of my head. "And thank you...for letting me into your life."
This man...will be the death of me. The guilt not so heavy on my heart anymore, I raised my head in an invitation, which he accepted without a second thought and claimed my mouth in a hot, wet kiss, our lips dancing against each other in perfect sync.
So as he kissed me senseless, frying up every part of my brain, the little part that survived told me that the danger hadn’t passed yet but that I had just been saved from getting caught temporarily.