Chapter 46

I knew what was going to happen—the invitation to his hotel room, and for the first time since Torin's death, I didn't push the thought away. Instead, I took a deep breath and let myself be swept up in the moment.

~~

The hotel Lucien brought me to was sleek and modern, and as I stepped inside, he closed the door behind us, his hand resting on the small of my back.

"It's not much," he teased with a grin, his eyes sweeping over the plush furnishings, "but it's all mine for the night."

"It's perfect," I murmured, feeling the heat rising in my cheeks. His hand slid around my waist, pulling me closer. "Are you sure?" he whispered, his breath warm against my ear. "We can always leave if you're uncomfortable."

"No," I protested, a hint of desire in my voice, "this is exactly where I want to be."

His grip tightened, and we stepped closer. His eyes searched mine for any signs of doubt, but all he found was a yearning that matched his own. He led me to the bed, and I sat down, my heart thumping. Seconds later, as he knelt before me, he took my hand in his, his thumb tracing gentle circles on my skin.

"I want to make sure you're okay with this," he murmured, his voice low and serious. "If at any point you want to stop, just say the word."

I nodded, unable to find the words to express how much I needed this connection. How much I needed to feel alive again. He leaned in, placing a soft kiss on my hand before standing and taking a step back. He began to unbutton his shirt, his eyes never leaving mine.

As the fabric fell away, it revealed the muscular contours of his chest, and my breath hitched. Stepping closer, his hand reached out to and he cupped my face. Hungry for his touch, I leaned into it like a plant reaching for the sun.

"You're beautiful," he breathed, his voice a caress. "I've wanted this since the moment I saw you."

I felt a flutter in my stomach, a mix of nerves and excitement. I reached up to touch his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin and the steady beat of his heart. His eyes darkened, and he leaned in, capturing my lips in a kiss that was both gentle and insistent. It was a kiss that promised comfort, passion, and a brief reprieve from the storm that was my life.

Our kiss deepened, and soon we were lost in the sensation, the outside world fading away. His hands explored my body with a tenderness that was both surprising and exhilarating, as if he was worshiping every inch of me.

~~

As we lay on the bed, our bodies entwined, I realized that this was more than just a physical release. It was a declaration of life, a rebellion against the pain that had held me captive for so long. With every touch, every caress, I felt myself letting go of the grief that had consumed me for over a year.

We moved together in a silent dance of passion, our bodies speaking a language that needed no words. The tension between us built to a crescendo, and when we reached the peak, it was as if we had climbed a mountain and were now standing at the top, looking out over a new horizon.

Hours later, as dawn began to break, we watched the city come to life from the window, our bodies still tangled together. Slowly, as the sun began painting the sky with strokes of pink and orange, the room grew lighter, and the darkness that had surrounded me for so long didn't feel as oppressive anymore. There was a glimmer of light, a spark of something new.

Afterward, we stepped away from the window, dressing in silence, the air charged with the unspoken promise of what the future might hold.

"Thank you," I whispered, as he pulled on his shirt, "I needed this more than you know."

His eyes searched mine, and he offered a gentle smile. "I know," he said, sitting beside me on the bed. He took my hand again, giving it a squeeze. "What happened to Torin... it was terrible. I can't even imagine what you've been through."

We sat for a moment in quiet reflection before I spoke up. "I've been in a prison of my own making. I thought that if I didn't let anyone in, I wouldn't have to feel the pain."

Lucien leaned in, pressing his forehead to mine. "You don't have to face it alone," he whispered. "I'm here for you."

The sincerity in his voice washed over me like a warm embrace, and I felt a sudden weight lift from my chest. "I know," I murmured.

But the moment was fleeting. As the sun fully rose and the light spilled into the room, reality began to seep back in. Lucien had to return to his world as a mob boss's son, a world I knew little about but was all too aware of the danger it posed. And I had to return to the bar, to the customers and the drinks and the endless nights of trying to forget.

We shared one last lingering kiss before he left, the scent of him still clinging to me as I showered and dressed. His touch remained etched in my skin, a phantom reminder of the night we had shared. As I stepped out into the bustling city, the sounds of traffic and chattering pedestrians assaulting my senses, I felt a strange sense of calm.

Walking back to work, the weight of the past year felt a little lighter. The bar was a familiar haven, a place where the smell of stale beer and the clink of glasses had become a comforting lullaby. I slid behind the counter, tying my apron with a sense of purpose that had been missing for too long.

The day passed in a blur of faces and drink orders. The regulars noticed the change in me, the spark in my eye that hadn't been there in months. They asked about my night, and for the first time, I didn't have to lie. I could tell them about the mysterious and charming man who had swept me off my feet—even if I left out the part about his family's notorious lineage.

As the night grew late and the last patron stumbled out, the quiet hum of the city outside the bar grew distant. I found myself thinking of the future, of what could be if I allowed myself to feel again. The thought of seeing Lucien again filled me with a mix of excitement and trepidation. Our worlds were so different, so separate. Could a spark like ours ever grow into a flame that could burn bright in the daylight?

I closed up the bar and headed home, my mind racing with possibilities and fears. The encounter had left me with more questions than answers, but one thing was clear: I didn't want to go back to the numbness that had been my life. I wanted to feel alive again, even if it meant dancing with danger.