Chapter Twenty-four

Alice

Familiar voices are heard as my vision clears, letting me see through the white light. A few people are talking in low voices before turning to look at me and I can finally catch the look on their faces, seeing that both of my parents and my best friends are here. As soon as I move, they turn to look at me.

"She's awake," Mama says before leaning in towards me, "My baby's awake."

I frown, "Ma?"

"I'm here, sweetheart. I'm here,"

Mama pulls me in for a hug as she cries, making me furrow my brows in confusion. It's pretty clear to me that I've been admitted into a hospital but the reason I'm here is quite a mystery. Have I gotten into a car accident? Was I seriously injured? Did I fall into a coma? Then again, I barely remember anything. I don't really remember much, actually.

"I'm glad you're safe," Papa says, joining mama.

Even Teresa and Juliet look a little worried but they have a smile plastered on their faces, somehow relieved that I am awake.

"What happened . . . exactly?" I ask, as soon as they pull themselves away from the embrace.

The last thing I remember was an intense pain all over my body but everything was a blur, even the incident seemed like a dream. I could feel the coldness of my skin and I could hear the sound of someone calling out my name, as if crying for me but I barely remember much. I just know that my best friend, Juliet is getting married soon and we were discussing her vows.

"Honey, you were in a car accident. You don't remember any of it?" Mama asks, caressing the back of my hand as I blink a few times, trying to remember anything or at least something but I surrender completely, shaking my head. "It's okay, we're just really glad you're safe. You're here with us now,"

"How long was I out?"

"Just a couple of days."

I glance down at my hands, seeing the fading bruises before nodding. "Okay,"

'We'll get the doctor," Mama says, grabbing papa's hand as they walk out of the room; leaving me with my two best friends. They immediately rush in for a hug which causes tears to stream down my cheeks, not realising how much I've missed them—filling the hole in my heart, even when I know for sure that I had just spent time with them a few days ago.

At the moment, I can only remember a few. For instance, when Juliet and Teresa came to my house to discuss about vows and the wedding, everything was clear until it wasn't. It feels as if I have been experiencing blackouts which is odd because I've never, ever, in my entire life experienced that.

How can it be triggered?

It's like I was in an endless episode of unknown endings. The whole thing just makes me utterly confused and I can't help but wonder if there's more to these missing chapters. Am I alive without a few things to remember? Am I alive but not fully living? Am I alive but with a price? It continues to make me wonder how bizarre this world is but we tend to ignore it.

Even my whole body feels a bit strained, especially in my neck area.

"We were so worried about you, Alice." Teresa says, wiping away her tears.

"I don't really remember much . . ."

"That doesn't matter. You're here and you're safe," Juliet interrupts.

Why do they keep saying that? Was I not safe before? I blink a few times before shrugging it all away, wondering about my previous condition. Mama said I was in a car accident but I don't remember driving or leaving the house which bothers me . . . how can I be in a car accident? What about the other person? Is she out and alive? Or was it a he?

Am I lucky to be alive? What about the other person?

A lot of unanswered questions are messing with my head but I try to stay focus, wanting to remember back anything. Anything that can help me move forward.

I feel a little bit empty at the thought—why do I feel empty? My parents and my best friends are here but why do I still feel lost? Why do I still feel as if I've lost something or more accurate, someone?

"I just want to go home," I mutter.

"We'll see what the doctor says."

In a matter of minutes, the doctor steps into the room with a smile on his face. He continues to look at me before checking my pulse and my eyes, wanting to make sure that there is nothing wrong with me. He's being really gentle before stepping back, "Alice, do you remember anything that happened?" He asks.

I shake my head, "Not really . . ."

"The car accident?"

"No . . . I don't remember that,"

"Okay, your parents told me that you can't remember much."

"Yeah, I don't know. I just woke up in a hospital,"

He nods, "You may have post-traumatic amnesia."

"What is that?" Mama asks, looking concern.

"Basically, post-traumatic amnesia is the time after period of unconsciousness when the injured person is awake but strangely, doesn't remember much. In this case, Alice doesn't remember what exactly happened and why she ended up being in a hospital. This is all due to a brain injury," The doctor explains, looking down at his report. "However, this is nothing severe. You may gain back your memory in a few days, weeks or even a couple of months—it takes awhile but . . . trust me, you'll get it back."

"It's not severe?"

"No, nowhere near that. You still remember your name and the people around you. You just forgot about the accident,"

I frown, "It's actually giving me anxiety."

"Understood. Anxiety is one of the symptoms. You can't remember things which causes you to overthink and when you overthink, your heart would beat faster." He replies.

Then, he turns to look at my parents; gesturing them to follow him outside.

--

As soon as I'm back at my house, I immediately make my way up the stairs and straight to my room. Everything is the same since I last left this room but I don't exactly remember the main reason of me leaving. However, I can see that everything is well made, even the bed looks untouched even though I can find my vanity a little bit messy.

I glance down at the bed, feeling the sheets before smelling a familiar cologne.

'What is this smell?' I thought. 'It smells really nice.'

My whole body feels warm as soon as I lay on the bed, surrounding myself with the smell. All of a sudden, my eyes begin to tear up which confuses me because as much as I recognise this smell, there is no way I can remember whom it belongs to.

I grip hard onto the sheets, forcing myself to remember. At least something.

"Alice?" Someone calls, causing me to sit up straight before turning to look at Ian, seeing him standing near the door. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Ian, I didn't hear you."

"Can I come in?" He asks, pointing at the bed.

I nod, "Come here."

Ian closes the door behind him before sitting beside me, pulling me in for an embrace as I lay on his chest; missing the warmth of another person. Both of his hands are wrapped around my body as he slowly rubs my arm, wanting to calm me down. It's working, it feels just nice.

"I heard the bad news," He says.

"Unfortunately. Did they tell you?"

He nods, "They did."

As he speaks, I can feel the vibration on his chest.

"They said you barely remember the accident,"

"I don't remember anything to be frank. I was really confused when I woke up,"

"It's okay, there is no rush. I'm glad you're okay," He responds.

I turn around to look at him, seeing him looking back at me. It has been awhile since I've seen Ian because he has been busy with work—he would always care about me, which makes him really special to me. It makes me wonder why I was really persistent in wanting Eric instead of Ian. Maybe, I only saw us as friends, really close friends.

He was always there for me through thick and thin, making me feel really special.

"Ian," I call out his name which causes him to blink.

"Mmmm?"

"How was life?"

"You just haven't seen me in awhile,"

"Well, I want to know what's up."

He chuckles, "What do you want to know?"

I continue to look at him, "How's work? How's it going with finding a new girlfriend?"

"You really have to go there, don't you?"

"I'm really curious!"

His embrace remains as he chuckles, letting feel his chest vibrating. For some reason, I miss this. The feeling of someone's warmth surrounding me and comforting me, it's really not something I experience on a daily basis so when there's a chance or a hope for me, I'd always grab it.

"Work is going good. I might even get promoted," He replies.

I raise an eyebrow, quite surprised. "Wow, that's amazing. I'm proud of you,"

"Yeah, I didn't expect it but they are considering me as partner." He smiles, letting me join him. "It's not even official yet but I have high hopes for it. Then again, I don't want to disappoint myself."

"You're amazing when it comes to your job. I'm pretty sure they're going to make you partner,"

Ian has always focused on his work. He might be mingling around with different women from time to time but he chooses to prioritise his work more than anything—he builds himself, he makes himself successful and I guess that is why women adore him, he has all the qualities of a perfect man. He knows it too well, he knows he is desirable and he chooses to put that forward.

"Thanks, Alice. Appreciate it," He pulls me closer, hugging me.

"For sure." I nod, "I'm very happy for you."

Our eyes are staring into one another as we smile and for a split second, there is something intriguing to discover. It makes me wonder if it's his gaze or just his smile. Then again, Ian has always been attractive . . . there's no point in denying the way he appears.

"Alice . . ." He calls out, his voice low and almost inaudible.

"Yeah?" I breathe, glancing down at his lips.

To my surprise, he leans in closer before meeting my lips. Our eyes close as we both move our lips in sync, our heads empty. His hand reaches up to my face as he continues to kiss me, softly which causes my whole body to melt at his touch—the way he moves is just perfect, unexpectedly perfect.

I pull away, meeting his eyes in order to see his reaction.

"I—I'm . . . I'm sorry?" He raises an eyebrow, slightly confused.

I chuckle before leaning in to kiss him back, earning a respond. He flips me around as he continues to kiss me, letting my body lay flat on the bed. Ian takes a few seconds to lean back, eyeing my face as he runs his fingers across my skin. Both of his eyes are focusing onto my face without showing any signs of regret as he leans back in, kissing me softly.

"You're perfect," He breathes as he kisses my neck.

I moan, breathing hard before running my fingers through his hair.

Ian meets my lips once more which causes my whole body to appreciate the comfort. Despite kissing my friend, at the time, it doesn't seem like a bad choice. Apparently, we can't stop kissing nor get our hands off of each other.