Chapter Thirty Seven: Who We Are

There were many arguments over what should happen and a lot of questioning, specifically from Aiden, about Cedric’s loyalty. However, all Lorraine wanted was to head home, lay in bed until all that mess blows over. “Look, this grimoire…” John took a seat next to her, looking at the three immortals as they argued, “It’s really bad news.”

Lorraine rubbed her temple tiredly, “I don’t feel right, something is wrong with me but I can’t pinpoint it.” She shook her head, then the pain made her hand fly to hold it. “I feel strange.”

John nodded, “You’ve lived most of your life as a human. Somehow, when the grimoire opened it set your magic free.” He held her hand and looked straight in her eyes, “Now, the only thing you should think about is how to make use of the grimoire. I have been told various things about the grimoire, about what it does to its owner. But the ones who can control it are usually the most powerful.” His look turned to pleading, “Lorraine, I…” His eyes averted towards Sally then back to her, “No, we. We need you, Lorraine.”

Lorraine felt even more burdened. He was looking at her like she held the moon, like she was the last straw he was holding onto to save his life. “I just…” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “I just need to rest.”

John nodded, “You should.” He leaned closer and whispered, “Take the grimoire with you. Keep it safe and away from anyone.” Lorraine could see it as clear as the day that he was suspicious of the others. Although she didn’t want to, she couldn’t help but wonder if he was right in his feelings. “I’ll find you tomorrow, I think I can help you with the magic thing. I may not be very powerful, but I can tell you what I know.” Once more, Lorraine nodded her agreement and she got off the couch.

She held the grimoire to her chest, “If you’re done fighting.” She said loudly, grabbing the attention of the others. “I’m going home.” They stopped arguing and turned to her with confused eyes. “I need to rest a bit.” Her eyes held those of Cedric, “I think we’re all glad that I turned out to be a Vancsura, now I need to sleep on it.”

She began walking when Cedric stopped her, “You will stay here. This isn’t an option.”

She felt heat coming from the grimoire, and she was close to dropping it. Then she heard a voice in her head, *“Traitor.”* The voice resembled her own, but the thought wasn’t hers. She narrowed her eyes, “You’re not the boss of me.”

“Let me take you then.” Aiden said and grabbed his car keys.

Lorraine shook her head then turned to Bates, “Would you mind driving me home?” Both Cedric and Aiden’s disapproval was clear on their faces, but she opted to ignore it. Bates only nodded and walked out with her, giving the other two a look to not fight her on this.

“Leave the grimoire here.” Cedric ordered and she turned to him with a raised eyebrow, then he continued, “You can’t stop them if they come after you.”

“This grimoire is mine!” Her raucous tone left no room for argument. She wasn’t sure why she was acting that way, but Lorraine felt like she was doing the right thing. It came natural to her, like a gut feeling, and she decided to follow it. Her feelings never led her astray.

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The ride to her house was silent. Bates noted how Lorraine had a worried and confused look on her face. So, he decided that she needed a moment to come to terms with everything. When he pulled over at her driveway, he turned towards her. “I can’t begin to imagine what’s going on in your head right now. I can’t even begin to understand how you must feel.”

Lorraine shook her head after a moment of nibbling on her lower lip, “I don’t understand what I think or how I feel.” She caught his dark eyes with her. “I just don’t feel like myself, something is different.” She paused for a second. “I mean…I'm a witch.” She chuckled humorlessly, “I liked it better when I wasn’t sure, even better when I didn’t know.”

“When I first turned.” Bates started with a distant look on his face, “I didn’t know how I felt too. It was strange, like my body wasn’t my own.” He then smiles, “But it was a blessing. Yes, I drink blood. And it took me sometime to get over the urge of killing anything with a heart beat, but it was the best thing that happened to me.”

“Didn’t take you for the cup-half-full kind of guy.” She said in a lighter tone.

Bates chuckled, “I’m not. I see facts, Lorraine. Think about this way, which is better fighting things head on or living your entire life in a lie. You are who you are, and I believe you’ll only change for the best.” Lorraine gave him a small smile and nodded her head. She didn’t entirely believe him, but she decided to let herself hope. She was about to get out when Bates' question stopped her. “Why didn’t you want Aiden or Cedric to drive you here?”

She casted her eyes down, “I cannot trust either of them. Cedric is hiding something… He confuses me to no end, and I … I don’t want to be fooled.” The emotions in her tone tucked at Bates’ heart; he could hear the meaning behind her words. *“Cedric meant more to her than just a simple acquaintance or even a friend.”* Bates only hoped that his maker wasn’t playing her. He only hoped that he hadn’t read Cedric wrong. “I’ll see you tomorrow at school.” She said with a small smile then left.

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Cedric was standing outside of her house. He had tried to tell himself that he was there for the grimoire, but he knew he wasn’t. He was there for her; the way she looked at him with distrust and wariness. Therefore, he found himself driving to her house and he had been standing in front of it for sometime just listening to her heartbeat and her short conversation with her mother. He waited until she went to her room. He told himself then that he would wait until she took her shower, then that he would wait a little longer.

He knew he was worried about their upcoming interaction and that was why he kept postponing jumping into her room. He heard her open the window in her room and he waited for her to fall asleep then he would leave. However, she never did. After an hour of him lurking in the shadows, he saw her look out of her window in his general direction. Then she made a gesture with her hand as if urging him to come inside. So, he did.

Once he did, he saw her standing with her arms crossed over her chest with a tilted head and a firm look on her face. “Why didn't you just come in?”

“How did you know I was there?” He asked her with squinted eyes.

She shrugged, “Perks of being a witch?”