One-Hundred and Twelve

“I’m not sure what just happened. I know that the sun bothers Gavin, but it feels like there was a bigger issue there. I thought he’s your mate, Tyler?” Gabe watched, confused by the deep blush consuming Tyler’s face.

“Finding one’s mate can be complicated, Gabe.” Bram said, a sour note to his tone.

“You and Izabella seem to be on cloud nine.” The teen laughed, having assumed that was just how mates worked. “You find the one and you just know. Both fall in love at first sight, and you go on to live happily ever after.”

“It’s not always that easy.” Tyler pushed his blond hair back, watching the horizon warmly. “Bram got lucky with her. He felt it right away, and she accepted him without question. Most of us aren’t that lucky. Bram went over nine-hundred years without finding a mate. At least not one he accepted fully.” There was no misplacing the soft, desire filled glance as it rested on Bram, who pointedly refused to look over at him.

“Oh.” Gabe chewed his lip uncomfortably.

“Yet, I even went as far as to marry the first person who claimed to be my mate. We were together for a very long time.” Bram was fully focused on his coffee cup as he twirled it on the table. The faint hiss of glass on glass a slight distraction. “My heart was never really in it, and because of that, we eventually became enemies because she realized she was never going to be my mate. It broke her heart and jaded her beyond a breaking point. To the point where she spent years trying to kill me. This vendetta eventually came to a head, and I was forced to kill her instead.” Bram bit his lip, pausing to watch as the sun glid the rest of the way over the horizon, bring its full white glow to the sky around them. “There’s a danger in it. Trying to love someone who loves you unconditionally when you don’t return those feelings. Even if you want to.” Bram’s words were soft, and deep. The sorrow in his blue eyes was undeniable.

“It’s incredibly painful for the other person too. And once you’ve chosen a mate that doesn’t return those feelings, it leaves you always feeling like you’ll never be enough. Even to the point where if you find someone else, someone who wants to fill that role, that first love never dies or goes away. It can leave your new mate green with jealousy, even though there’s nothing you can do to change it. Even if they know there’s nothing between the two of you. You’ll never be able to be fully theirs, because your heart will always yearn for the other.”

“That’s why Gavin left then. He didn’t want to hear you talking like this.” Gabe asked, his eyes wide watching Tyler. “You want Bram, too?”

“I’m happy with Gavin.” The words were calm, and simple. “I’m glad that Bram and Izabella found each other.” There was no joy in his words. “But that will never change the fact that, yes, I want Bram.”

“Wow. That fucking sucks.” He looked up sheepishly at Bram, waiting for him to chastise him for his language. But it never came.

Tyler laughed bitterly. “It definitely fucking sucks.” He nodded.

“So, I guess, this is really the crux of this conversation then. You’re worried because Jen and I are both assuming we’re going to be each other’s mates. And it could turn bad for one of us.”

Both Bram and Tyler nodded this time. Tyler leaned back as Bram sat forward. “I’m especially worried because of the imbalance of power. Mihaela and Tyler were not the only ones who tried to mate with me. The more power a vampire has, the more others will desire them. That’s going to go for Jen too. Other vampires always went after Mihaela because she had powers like mine. A few of her lovers were killed because of others jealousy. It added to her hate for me, because she knew that if I’d just chosen her, she would never have to worry about them trying to kill me.”

“What the hell?” Gabe slammed his hands on the table. “So what? Why can’t you just change me instead? Then Jen and I can be the same!” He shot out of his chair, anger bursting forth.

“Because that’s not possible. I can turn you, but that doesn’t help our situation at all. I wouldn’t be able to let you leave with them. I’m afraid Tyler and Gavin are going to have trouble controlling Jen already. Add your already hot nature to that bundle and it’s a guaranteed disaster.” Bram said, standing slowly. “You can choose to be half-vampire, like Tyler. You can choose to be a full vampire, like Gavin. Or you can choose to remain here, and be you. Gabe the human. Who can go to any collage he wants, build any career he can dream. You can choose to be the heir to a fortune. Women will flock to you like bees to honey. But these are where I must draw the limits.”

The door to the kitchen opened and three little monkeys ran in, instantly making it look like there was a tornado blowing through the room. Bram sighed. Tyler sat forward, his voice calm. “Believe me, no one in the house is going to understand how much it sucks to not be on the same level of those around you. Not better than I do." He rolled his eyes, his ire showing through. Of course. He was only a half vampire. Nothing like the others. "But we do have our uses.”

“Easy for you to say.” Gabe snapped, “You’ve made a better damsel in distress than Izabella.”

Everything went silent. Even the kids in the kitchen had frozen and were now staring out the back doors toward them. Bram cleared his throat. “I told Izabella this was a mistake.” Bram grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I’m sorry.” Gabe said, falling back into his chair as his head hit the table with a loud clunk. “It’s just…”

“Frustrating.” Tyler offered. “It’s not going to get less frustrating. The point we’re trying to make is this, Gabe. These choices aren’t easy. Not a single on of them. Becoming a vampire isn’t going to erase your problems. It’ll only get you into more. We want to make sure you’re able to make the best decision for you before you do it.”

The kitchen door opened and closed again, but Gabe just assumed it more kids. He covered his head with his hands. “You’re both making it sound like I’ve already lost her.”

“We want you to be aware that you may have.” Bram said. “We want you to know what you are walking into.”

“Bram also isn’t a fan of the idea of you becoming a vampire.” A female’s voice said softly from the other side of the porch. When Gabe looked up, tears shining in his eyes as Izabella walked over to him, putting a gently hand on his shoulder. “It’s good to know the possibilities. It is. From the best outcome to the worst. When making an important decision, you want to be as informed as possible. Remember, no one here chose to turn Jen. We’re just trying to make sure we’re doing what’s best for her.” Izabella’s hand gently smoothed his hair as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “We want to make sure we do what’s best for you. Remember, Tyler and Bram have been this way their whole lives. It’s not always been an easy go for them. Just know, they care. It’s easy to focus on the immortality. The powers you gain, the strength, and agility. All the glittery bits. They want to make sure you’re grounded with the rest of it too.”

Birds chirped from the manicured garden beyond. Bram held up his coffee cup, slipping back into the kitchen. As he walked in, all the children went a little crazy. Suddenly it was, daddy this and dad that. Izabella stood calmly, stroking Gabe’s hair. “I’m sorry. I guess I wasn’t expecting all that.”

“How could you be, hon?” She said quietly. Lifting his face up so that he was looking at her. “Listen, I think you need a little break. Take some time to think over what the boys told you. Put it together with everything you’ve learned from Jen. Maybe give her a call. I know talking things through with her helps. I’m going to go make some breakfast. Once the kids have eaten, I can have Bram hang out with them and you and I can go for a walk and talk it out too. If you want. Some food in your belly would be good too.”

“’Kay. Thanks, Iz.” He smiled up at her, as she shuffled back off to the kitchen. Looking out at the view from the veranda, Gabe sighed. He’d left his phone upstairs. Normally, he would be itching to call Jen. He was sure she’d be quick to put his fears to rest, but he was worried about everything they’d said. And Bram didn’t look like he was going to move on being the one to turn him.

He sighed, slipping out the back door and heading into the garden. He just needed some quiet. As him mind tumbled over the influx of information, his eyes kept going to the horizon. It wasn’t long ago he and Jen were in Transylvania, sitting out on Bram’s balcony, watching the sunrise. Sure, the view from the house, was better than most that he’d seen in his day, but nothing would ever beat the time he had with her then. His fingers grazed over the tops of the bushes as he walked past them. The more he thought of it, the more he realized that Jen had already complained, immensely, that she would never see another day again. That she missed the warmth of it on her face, and that the darkness wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. She was lonely. Couldn’t see the kids anymore. Couldn’t see Izabella. Her friends.

Gabe wanted to make it better for her. The others didn't make him feel like this would make it better for her. The next question was, could he really give up so much to do so? He sighed. After the conversation with the guys, he wasn’t so sure about that anymore.