39.

Xander 

It’s a little after 18:00 and Nikki and I are laying on the floor, covered with a small blanket that was on the couch, she’s fast asleep, and I’m awake, drawing small circles on her arm. 

Alone with my thoughts, I’m overwhelmed by the silence. A lot has happened, and every time I realize how far I’ve come; I’m amazed at the amount of unintentional healing I’ve done. The more I experience life with Nikki, the more I realize how much I missed out on growing up and being shielded and lied to by my father. 

People come in all forms, good and bad. It doesn’t matter who they are or where they come from, a human is defined by their actions and circumstances, each of our experiences in life determines who we become, we either chose to let them define us or redefine our circumstances.

I’m about to be a father, and every day I’m learning something new about pregnancy and just how much value there is in a woman and why they are the supreme human being on this earth. They deserve more and better. 

I look at Nikki and I kiss her forehead. I picked my phone up and saw a message from Damien, saying he’s coming over. 

I groan, and I sit up from the floor, I grab my sweats and put them on, I pick Nikki up but as soon as she’s in my arms she wakes up. 

“What’s going on?” she asks groggily. 

“Damien is coming over, he needs to talk to me about something,” 

She wiggles around in my arms and tells me to put her down. I place her on the couch, and she looks up at me with sleepy eyes.


“You need more sleep, baby?”

She shakes her head, “No, I need to get dressed.”

I chuckle, and I give her her clothes, she gets dressed, and she picks up a packet of chips and starts to eat. 

“Did he say what it was about?”

I sit beside her and shake my head, “Nope, all I know is that he’s coming along, so maybe it’s got something to do with Charles.”

Nikki hums, “Okay.”

I try to reach into the packet of chips, and she slaps my hand, I laugh and grab the packet from her. She glares at me and tries to grab it back, but quickly jumps off the couch. 

“Xander, give me my chips.”

I take a chip and eat it; she attempts to grab the packet, and I hold it above my head.

She pouts, “Xander quit playing with me.” 

I laugh, “What’s the magic word, baby?”

“Fuck you,” 

I raise an eyebrow, “Seriously, then you don’t want these chips.”

Somebody grabs them from my hand, and I look to my side and see Damien standing beside me, he gives the chips to Nikki and gives her a wink.

“Seriously dude,”
Damien just laughs and Nikki hugs him.

“Thank you, Dae,” 

“So wassup? Sounded serious,” I say as we walk to the kitchen. 

Damien looks nervous.

“It’s about Charles,” he says.

I open the fridge and rake out two beers, I open one and give it to him and I open mine, and we sit on the kitchen island chairs.

“What’s wrong with him? Other than the usual,”

He looks down at his beer and sighs, “I want to propose to him.” 

I froze, he wants to marry Charles. This isn’t the first time this has happened, so as his best friend, I’m worried. The last time someone tried to tie him down, he went on a hoeing spree and vowed to never be tied down. 

“Okay, that’s good,” is all I can say.

“He told me about Mark and how he rejected him, and I’m scared he might do the same to me,” he confesses, “I love him, and I want to be with him forever, but I’m scared he’s not ready for that kind of commitment.”

I sigh, “I agree, I would be scared too, but I believe that Charles wants the same. He’s always wanted to get married and have a family, Mark wasn’t the one, but I know that you are.”

“You think so?”

I nod, “I know so. What Charles was before is completely different to how he is today, especially with you.”

He really, I mean I’m mostly happy that he doesn’t bother me as much as more because single Charles is annoying as hell but seeing him truly happy with someone gave me peace of mind. He’s settling, finally.

“Xander is right,” Nikki says as she walks into the kitchen, licking her fingers. 

I chuckled, “And how would you know that?”

“Charles and I have known each other for years, we met at a Paris fashion week.”

Of course, fashion. 

“When were you going to tell me this?” I ask.

Nikki folded her arms and tilted her head, “When were you going to ask?”

I glare at her, “Fair enough.”

“So, what do you have planned for the proposal?” Nikki asks, standing between my legs, her elbows digging into my thighs.

Damien shrugs, “That’s why I’m here, I’ve already asked for a blessing from his mother, and now I need your blessing as his best friend and then all that’s left is to plan the damn thing.” 

“When did you do that?”

“Yesterday, Charles flew her in to meet with your mother,” Damien says, sipping on his beer.

“Oh, that’s really sweet. We give you our blessing, and so does the little one,” Nikki smiles, “Lucky for you Charles has always talked about his dream proposal, so Xander and I will take care of it.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to trouble you guys,”

I shake my head, “You two have been there for us, now it’s our turn.”

Damien smiles, “Thank you.”


“Yay,” Nikki says, “We’ll be using Xander’s platinum card, so it won’t hurt.”

“Excuse me,” 

Damien and Nikki laugh, “I didn’t say it wouldn’t hurt you.”

I roll my eyes, “Unbelievable.” 

“When would like for the proposal to happen?” 

“I was thinking this weekend, during our trip to Cape Town,”

“Oh, that’s good. Cape Town is wonderful this time of year, and it’s perfectly aligning with my plans.”

“Then it’s settled, we have a proposal to plan,”

Nikki squeals and Damien grins.

I just pray he says yes.