All Nightmare Long

Oliver

The night dragged on. I had buried myself in work as soon as I got back from town, trying to keep myself busy. I was behind, anyway, so it was a good use of time. Patrols needed to be increased due to the imposing threat, the full moon was around the corner, I needed to debrief all the extended leadership of the pack… the list went on and on. I didn’t really trust anyone else to help Lya acclimate, and I could only go so long being stretched this thin, so it was time to delegate - not something I was good at.

'One of the Luna’s unspoken duties must be to make sure you don’t try and do everything yourself,' Adair mused. I chuckled at his hypothesis, but he must have been right - Lya had only been here a few days, and already, she unknowingly had me wrapped so tightly around her little finger I was willing to actually relinquish my hold on some of the pack management. If my dad was still around, he would have laughed.

It really wasn’t fair that most transitions of power were due to the death of the previous alpha. Not a day went by that I didn’t wish for my father’s guidance. Never before had I needed him around for this sort of advice, though. For some reason, needing to talk to him for a personal matter stung a little more than pack matters. The alpha gig was not all it was cracked up to be, and I could never figure out why it was so desirable to everyone. A million times over, I would give anything to be a nobody in the pack. And now I was hoping with all my being the person who meant the most to me would stand beside me in this god awful role. I wouldn’t blame her if she was smart enough to reject me because of it. Maybe Thom had it right and the best way to have a happy, peaceful life was to completely remove yourself from a pack.

'Maybe there was no more happiness left for him here,' Adair mused. 'But we can still find it.' I knew what he meant. Our kind are supposed to be part of a pack, and the idea of leaving made me physically ill. I just couldn’t shake the feeling that being the leader of the pack wasn’t what was meant for me.

'It isn’t meant for you. It is meant for us. We must have a luna. An alpha is nothing without his luna.'

'You speak as if you have done this before,' I chuckled.

'Because I have,' Adair confirmed. 'I may be your first wolf, but you are not my first human. You have much to learn, young grasshopper.'

I stood up and made my way over to the couch on the other side of my office. I plopped down and poured myself a glass of bourbon. I swirled the glass around and closed my eyes. Adair’s words shook me. If what he said was true, and this wasn’t his first go ‘round, his constant voice of reason made sense. But wouldn’t it be a well known thing if our wolves predated us?

I tried to let my mind explore the idea a bit more, but it wandered back to Lya instead. Even from here, if I thought hard enough, I could smell lilac and pine. It reminded me of the trip out to the coast of Maine to visit an allied pack my parents had taken me along for a couple years before they passed. Fitting - Lya was from Maine, too. I wondered if Lya’s parentage had ties to that pack. I needed to get that book back from Dr. Whitledge - I hadn’t had much time to look at it before passing it on.

Adair was restless, too. For someone who had done this before, I would think he would have more composure.

'We should go to her,' he insisted.

'No,' I said. 'We can manage.'

'She can’t.'

I sighed as I sipped the bourbon. Maybe my wolf really was just pulling my leg and he had just as much experience as me.

'It isn’t your first time either, you just aren’t in touch with your past selves the way I am.'

I furrowed my eyebrows. I couldn’t say I was impressed with the conversation my wolf and I were having.

'Stop whining,' Adair snapped. 'You aren’t the concern right now.'

'Well then what is the concern?' I asked.

Adair growled and paced around, refusing to settle. I huffed, sat back, and sipped more of my drink. It was becoming more and more difficult to keep Adair from pushing through and taking over. This battle of wills was not one I was familiar with; usually we were very much on the same page.
I wasn’t sure what was louder - the ear piercing wail, or Adair’s howl of despair. Before I could even think, I was on my feet and headed in the direction of the commotion - out toward the patio. I seethed at the thought of patrol letting a rogue get this far into territory without alerting me, but Adair didn’t have the usual fire that lit up our bones at the possibility of a threat.

Gregory met me in the hall. “Who was that?” he demanded.

“I don’t know,” I said curtly, quickening my pace toward the patio door. We burst through, looking left and right to find whoever screamed. There was another scream to the right - down the side of the patio that was against the alpha wing. I rushed towards it, gnashing my teeth. Gregory was close behind. He almost ran into me as I screeched to a halt in front of a couple chairs. Lya was curled up, asleep, and looked as if she was hyperventilating.

Gregory cast me a wary look, cocking an eyebrow.

“Go,” I snapped. “And call off Cody.” Knowing Gregory, the first thing he would have done is alerted our Gamma - head of security - to a threat at the packhouse.

He simply nodded. “Shout if you need anything,” he said as he turned to walk back inside.

Cautiously, I knelt down beside her. I knew what her wolf could do when she felt threatened, and I really didn’t want to wake the beast right this moment… although sometimes Tala seemed to be the more reasonable of the two.

“Hey,” I said softly, trying not to startle her. I reached out to touch her when I got no reaction.

Touching Lya felt like I was catching fire. Sparks danced along my fingers. I wondered if she felt those sparks too, and what she thought they were. I ran my hand up her bare arm and cupped her face. “Lya,” I said a little louder.

Lya’s frantic breathing calmed, jaw unclenched, and body relaxed, but she still didn’t wake up. I sighed. The night was cold, so I couldn’t just leave her out here, especially if she was just going to scream bloody murder all night. I slipped my arms around her and picked her up, carrying her back to her room. I tensed as she cuddled into my chest, but Adair purred.

I set Lya down on her bed, but couldn’t stand as she had her hands clenched in my shirt. I uncurled her fingers and looked down at her, brushing a strand of hair out of her face.

'Let’s just stay here for a bit,' Adair encouraged.

I huffed. 'No,' I insisted.

Don’t get me wrong, every single primal part of me wanted to wrap my arms around Lya and hold her to me all night. But the rational, moral side reminded me that, even though mates were destined, crossing any line she had - especially before she had even recognized the bond - would ruin any hope of a future we had. Lya didn’t know we were mates. She would lead every step of this, and she had not invited me to bed.

But still, every time I tried to shift or move away from the side of her bed, she clenched my shirt in her hands again, or grabbed at my arm. She was asleep. Her reactions were probably just the faint bits of the mate bond she could pick up on - only accessible when all her conscious walls were down.

Finally, painstakingly, I tore myself away and made my way back to my office. Unsurprisingly, Cody was waiting for me. He was lounged back in one of the leather chairs and swirling the tumbler.

“How’s your mate?” he drawled. His southern accent always came out when he drank.

I scowled, turning to refill my own glass. “I’m sure you’ve been filled in on what the potential security threat really was.”

“And who the knight in shining armor was,” Cody added. A smirk played across his face. My grimace, however, did not change. “What? Some of us would be more than happy to fill those shoes.”

I softened at his confession. While Cody didn’t say as much, I knew it was in reference to the unspoken rejection he constantly received from his mate.

I sighed. “That girl doesn’t need a knight in shining armor; she just needs a sword.”

“Right,” he nodded, “until she has night terrors so bad it wakes the entire pack up.”

Cody and I were friends. He initially came here for the warrior training the pack provided, but stayed for the sense of community my father had created. He had joined the pack shortly after I had taken over, so after my father’s time, but his legacy lived on long enough to attract a few that only made this pack stronger. We had worked hand in hand to develop my father’s warrior training further, as well as expand the scope of security to include more scouting and IT in the burgeoning age of technology. Cody’s original pack was small and on the verge of dying out, and I do think part of his reason for so willingly and quickly moving packs was to find a mate.

“I think I might reject Ellie,” he blurted. There was apprehension in his tone, but certainty in his eyes.

I stared down at my glass, not knowing what to say. The mate bond was a well known part of who we were as werewolves, but recently there had been a growing number of the population who rejected the idea, preferring to find their partner the more human way. This very rarely worked, however, and led to problems for all parties involved.

I took a sip of the scotch, trying to buy time before responding. “Have you talked to her about it?” I finally asked.

Cody scoffed. “About what? Her actions have made it plenty obvious.”

“Have you asked her why she’s stringing you along?” I clarified. “It’s been a year. I would imagine, if she just didn’t want a mate, she would have formally rejected you by now.” Cody huffed. Before he could interject with a defense, I continued. “The mate bond can’t be broken until one of you officially rejects the other. We both know that.”

Cody sat back and sighed. “You have a point. But I’m tired of limbo.”

“You and me both,” I scoffed, finishing off the scotch.

Cody laughed. “Welcome to the club. Meetings are at 11 on Friday nights and we have t-shirts.”

Just as I was reaching for the bottle to refill my glass, the same blood curdling scream that initially pulled me from my office echoed down the halls of the packhouse.

“I hope she gets over that soon,” Cody said as he stood up, “or you’re in for some long nights.”

I shot him a glare as I made my way out of the office. Soon enough, I was in front of Lya’s door.

'I told you we should have stayed,' Adair grumbled.

'Not now.' I took a deep breath and walked through the door. Lya was curled up as small as she could get, shaking and sobbing. I crouched down next to her and brushed a strand of her deep auburn hair out of her face. Sparks jolted through my fingers, making tearing them away almost painful.

“Lya,” I whispered. She shuddered and let out another whimper. I shook her shoulder. “Lya,” I said a little louder.

I huffed. This girl was a remarkably hard sleeper, and it didn’t exactly seem like sleep was treating her well.

'We stay now,' Adair growled. Before I could even fight it, I felt my bones starting to crack and rearrange, and Adair seized every bit of control.

Adair wasn’t like this. We shared power, neither one of us having the final say. If it wasn’t an agreement, it was a discussion until it was.

'We can’t do this,' I grumbled.

'You can’t do this because your mate would lose it,' Adair said. 'But my mate is Tala, and Tala wants me so you go away and I will protect our mate.'

'She’s not in danger, though,' I pointed out, trying to urge Adair to let Lya be.

'Not all threats attack physically.'

With that, I could tell the conversation was over. Adair hopped up on the bed and rested his head on Lya’s side. If I knew my wolf, that’s where he would stay until he decided whatever was tormenting her had passed.