Chapter 139

Rowan sat beside me on the edge of the bed, his hand resting gently over mine. His thumb traced soothing circles against my skin as he spoke.  

"I'll tell you everything I can," he said softly. "Everything you deserve to know."  

I swallowed, feeling a strange mix of fear and anticipation knotting in my stomach. "Please," I whispered. "I need to know who I am — who *we* are."  

Rowan nodded, his eyes never leaving mine. "Like I mentioned earlier, your real name is Ariadne. You came to me as a bride, posing as Isabelle Carstairs who faked her death to get out of marriage from me. I was a cripple then, so I understand why she was so hesitant to marry me. You took her place.” 

“I had a dream… about a man in a wheelchair, that was you?”

I asked and Rowan nodded.

“Yes. Because of you, I am able to walk again. Thanks to you.” 

“Some things happened, the Royal Concubine, who happens to be my stepmother found out your true identity. She ordered your execution. You were saved by an otsayak like you. She took you in and in exchange you spied for Braam. So months after, you came back and  started calling yourself Arin, posing as the Emperor of Braam’s niece and Braam’s emissary.“   

My chest tightened. Two fake identities?! 

"It looks like I have lived different lives, except my own. I pretended to be a member of the Braam royal family?” My voice trembled 

"Yes. You did what you thought was right. You still are," Rowan said firmly. "Everyone here believes that is your true identity and for some reason Braam hasn’t exposed that bit of information yet. Although to be honest they wouldn't claim you now."  

I shook my head slowly. "Why wouldn't they? Weren’t they the ones who sent me on a mission? I was spying on you because of them right?” 

Rowan's expression darkened. "Because you betrayed them. You made a complete turn around and married me — an alpha king. That wasn’t your mission." He paused, his voice dropping lower. "They started threatening to go to war because of what happened. They were the ones who captured you."  

The weight of his words settled heavily in my chest.  

"Are you saying… I’m the reason for the war?" I asked, barely able to get the words out.  

Rowan leaned in, his forehead resting against mine. "No. With or without you they would have advanced on us. That’s what they do. It was never any fault of yours. You were just a pawn in their silly game."  

I squeezed his hand, overwhelmed.  

Rowan sat back, his voice growing more serious. 

"After you disappeared I feared that you were captured. Lucian was the only one who had found out  you were an otsayak so I thought he had a hand in your disappearance. Lucian was arrested, alongside Lilian, Reagan and his wife managed to escape with their daughter in the dead of the night. We couldn't track them — they disappeared without a trace."  

"Reagan?" I echoed, the name unfamiliar yet oddly important.  

"He's my brother. Well, my father’s son. The second Prince. He’s a coward." Rowan's voice was tight, controlled. "Lucian was shocked by his arrest. But strangely, he confessed everything. He  told me he was plotting against me from the very start. He wanted the throne, and he would have killed me to take it. He insisted he didn’t know anything about your disappearance though.” 

I blinked, stunned. "Lucian... your brother?"  

Rowan's jaw clenched. "Yes. My brother. But he's dangerous, Arin. He has to be executed. I can't let him live after what he's done. If you manage to remember half of the things he has done to you, you won’t be advocating for him to be kept alive.” 

I felt the sting of tears in my eyes. "I know…But he's still your brother," I said quietly. "The only family you have left here. Isn’t he?” 

Rowan's expression faltered, his eyes flickering with pain.  

"The soldiers support you. And him," I added, my voice stronger now. "From what I heard, they believe in you. They don’t want him dead because they all believe he’s a great soldier. You don't need to kill him to prove you're the rightful king. You already are."  

Rowan stared at me for a long moment, his face unreadable. Then he sighed, running a hand down his face. "For you," he murmured. "I'll come to a deal with him. But he won't go free."  

I nodded, relief washing over me.  

A knock came at the door, and the royal physician entered, bowing his head slightly. He was an older man with silver hair and kind eyes.  

"My Alpha, My Queen," he greeted respectfully. "I've come to check on you both."  

Rowan stood and helped me sit up. The physician approached, his hands gentle as he examined me for several minutes. 

“She’s the one you should be checking. How is she?" Rowan asked, his voice laced with worry.  

The physician smiled. "The Queen is strong. And the baby is doing well. Everything looks as it should. You should expect the child in the next few months."  

I exhaled shakily, my hand drifting to my stomach. A baby.  

An actual baby. It was the one thing I had still not come to terms with. 

That I was growing a little human inside of me. 

Rowan's hand covered mine again, his smile softening. "I hope the war's over by then," he murmured. "I want our child to grow up in peace."  

The physician nodded solemnly. Rowan hesitated before speaking again.  

"Her memories... will they come back?"  

The physician's face fell slightly. "It's hard to say. These things take time. She should focus on familiarizing herself with her surroundings. Being here, with you, may help trigger what's lost."  

Rowan's grip tightened on my hand. "Thank you."  

The physician bowed and left. Rowan kissed my forehead. "I have to meet with my men. Rest, my love."  

But resting was the last thing I could do.  

\---

After a while, the room began to feel suffocating. I wandered through the halls, my mind spinning with everything Rowan had told me.  

My feet carried me aimlessly until I heard voices — loud ones — coming from a large room down the corridor. I stepped closer, staying near the edge of the doorway, listening.  

"Our people can't survive like this!" one soldier argued. "They need to hunt, farm and trade. Keeping Zaire on lockdown will starve them."  

"We can't lift the lockdown yet," another voice said firmly. "Braam could strike at any moment. Their numbers outweigh ours.” 

Rowan's voice cut through the noise. "I'm thinking for the best way to stop Braam without a full war. I'm not sending more men to die unless there's no other choice."  

"We need leverage," one of the soldiers said. "Something they care about. A reason to come to the table."  

A pause.  

Then another voice spoke up. "The Queen. She's the Emperor's niece. If anyone can convince him to make peace, it's her. She will help us stop the war now that she is back.” 

My heart stopped.  

Rowan didn't respond right away.  

"The Queen is… still recovering," he said finally. "She has lost her memories."  

"That would even garner more sympathy" another soldier said. "She's our queen and a daughter of Braam.  With her help, we can plan a diplomatic meeting to amicable end this war, extend an olive branch.”