21| I want you.

❌Trigger warning!!!❌
This chapter consists of violence that may trigger some people so proceed with caution.



Ruby.

The rain announced its coming through the rumbling thunder and lightning. As I looked outside the large window in my room, I saw that there were growling, ominous dark clouds gathering above. I fought the urge to jump into my bed and wrap my duvet over my body in fear. I was afraid of thunderstorms, they gave me the chilly vibes and seemed to always announce the coming of something bad.

The thunder had rumbled over and over the night my mother took her own life, it was also present when my dad announced his intention of bringing in Lola and Sapphire. It always seemed to be there to mock me, to tell me that my total existence was just a joke, a joke to give certain people some fun. I hate thunderstorms, yet I fear them. I will always fear them.

For a moment, everything stops. Even the wind holds its breath. A streak of hot silver splits the sky and I almost screamed. The storm had ebbed to nothingness, now the silence was as pure as the wintry blanket outside.

I suddenly heard the main door open but then I couldn't hear footsteps. The night was scaring me more and more but I managed to get off the couch I was seated, took the nearest object I could find and walked out of my room. I tiptoed across the large living room in a fighting stance with my weapon like I was sure to overtake whoever the intruder was. Silence hung in the air before a falling glass shatters on the ground and then I screamed.

"What are you doing?"
I heard the deep voice that I recognized anywhere. Toby.

"Why the fuck are you acting like a rat in the house? I could've killed you!" I screamed lowering my weapon.
He stared at me like I was a mad woman and then looked to and fro at my face and the so called weapon.

"Kill me? Really? With a book? Seriously, Ruby? Nobody dies from being hit with a book."

"Whatever! Always announce your arrival as loudly as you can instead of just walking in like an assassin." I half-shouted.

Silence. Toby was silent as he stared at me with a look I couldn't quite decipher. I looked down at my body and noticed that my nightwear had exposed my cowgirl panties and I had a nipple slip. I tried to cover up immediately and proceeded to walk into my room until he blocked my way.
I tried again and he did the same thing.

Silence gnawed at my insides as words suddenly seem to evade me. He stared at me while I tried to do the same but could only stare at the door behind him. The silence was like a gaping void, needing to be filled with sounds, words, anything. Silence seeped into our every pore, like a poison slowly paralyzing us from either speech or movement.

After what seemed like hours of unnatural staring contest. I finally found my voice even though it came out as a whisper. "I would like to retire to bed and you're in my way."

"I know that." He replied.

I tried to mask my confusion about the whole scenario and proceeded to leave again but collided into him this time.
It was getting frustrating.

"Toby, I don't want any issues this night, please. I'm trying to avoid you as you want, don't toy with me, please."

"I want you." He suddenly said.

Yeah! Like some kind of property or something?

And then my stupid heart decided to shut down my rational mind. It fluttered. Could he finally be coming around and warming up to me?
Has he fallen in love with me? Has he seen the good in me? Is it just sexual and physical or is it deeper? But then, he'd still have to express that first like a normal human being, wouldn't he?

My heart kept beating as he moved closer to me.
"Wha... what are you doing?" I choked out.

"Having fun with my wife." He smirked.

"Th... this is fun?"

"Don't I have the right to fuck the woman I married? Even the holy books warns against denying your husband the right to that." I instantly knew where he was going, what he wanted and what he might do to me and so I sprinted across him towards my room but was only knocked down within a twinkle of an eye.

"Stop acting like a little child, Ruby! It's just sex!" He growled while I whimpered from the fall.

"You... you said you're not in any way attracted to me, why would you want to have sex with me?" I whispered pathetically.

'More like rape you like the trash that you are." My inner voice countered, mocking my cowardice and low self esteem.

"Just because I can." Toby shrugged as he began to pull off his polo shirt and jean trousers.

"P... please. You don't want to do this. Please, I swear I'll never cross your path again." I begged desperately as he just smiled basking in my weakness.

"Your weakness and cowardice empowers me, Ruby. It's like food to my already inflated ego and pride. I love it."

He said before he laid his hands around my neck and squeezed to give me a choke, my eyes became round and my lips parted. His coarse tongue licked at my skin, slender fingers curled in my hair. My body experienced absolute stillness as not even a sound escaped from my mouth despite the pain. My legs moved, panicked, but he was in the zone, climax only minutes away. As his pleasure increased so did his grip, my eyes closed and my head lolled. A choked cry of plea forced itself up my throat, and I felt a drop run down my cheek. That's what he wanted, ejaculation was instant.

He dismounted and walked out of my sight without saying a word.

Slowly I tried to get up but quickly realized how futile it was when I had to bite my lip to keep from crying out. Sharp pain lanced through my head and colorful spots flashed in front of my eyes, it felt like my whole body had been beaten and every movement caused some muscle or bone to ache. I decided to remain on the floor, naked, bruised, teary and bloody.

I laid there, tears rolling out of my eyes, pale hands trembling with fear, pain and sadness. I had been trying so hard not to let out the screams, but now it seemed so impossible to keep those screams in. The noise was ripping my heart. At first it was the occasional wince of a groan, but then it got louder and moved constant. I screamed the loudest I had ever screamed in my whole life.

Toby.

Water tripped down soothingly past my shoulders, through my flaxen hair, and continuing over my abs down to my legs.

It was those stupid revealing clothes. Those pretentious innocent eyes. That stupid batting eyelashes. That can only be it. Why else would I have been so attracted to her? Of all women.

She succeeded in seducing me, she did it. And the blood, the blood.
Of course, she'd be a Virgin, which other man would have been able to stomach having sex with her. At least, I put her out of her Virgin misery, she would have been one till old age. She should be thankful.

Of course, she'd be thankful, and probably on cloud nine right now. I have always been the man of her dreams after all, having sex with me was probably on her bucket list. Time to tick it off, Ruby.

I finally decided to step out of the shower and with a towel tied around my waist, I walked out of my room and into the living room. She still laid on the cold floor, naked. A strange feeling tugged at my chest, one that was looking like guilt but I was quick to discard it. She likes playing the victim. Such a pretentious one.

"Are you planning on spending the night on that floor looking that disgusting?" I let out harsher than intended.

"Stop acting like you haven't daydreamed about this your whole life. I can see though all these acting. Your seduction plan paid off so go and celebrate or something. Stop trying so hard to look pathetic. Having sex with a trash like you is a stain to me already!"

All that met my harsh words were silence. Total silence. It was almost agonizing. Almost. I struggled between accepting that I was a monster and blaming her for everything. Choosing the later was easier and that was what I chose.

Before walking back into my room, I took one last look at her.

Broken, bruised, Pathetic, teary. That's what she gets for barging into my life without my consent and always being the idiot that she was.