Chapter Six: Jenny

Chapter Six
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Jenny



My mind had been swirling all evening, lying in my bed. I wasn't drunk. I barely had two drinks, but Xander was messing with my head.

Only a blind man wouldn't see how much we wanted each other. I was lusting and so was he. He answered some of my questions, but it was that one text that he sent that was messing with my head.

*I'd like you to be.*

Just five words. He was admitting that he wanted me to be his. I kept trying to deflect it in my head, but I couldn't use my desire to not be a biker bitch as a shield. I got it confirmed by Danica that those girls took a pledge, and none of them were forced into it.

Danica knew something about the reasons for Xander taking away the forcefulness of it from the gang. No girls had been raped or forced into being whores since Xander started his reign over the chapter, and I had to wonder why. No one would say.

Did something happen to him or someone he cared about?

I liked Xander, a lot, and that made this dangerous. I didn't want to be one of those women who let themselves fall for a man and then had their heartbroken. I had been able to avoid it so far, but was it at the age of twenty-seven that I would finally get the first blow to my heart? Was Xander Davenport my kryptonite?

I wished I could talk to Meg. She was one of my best friends growing up, and I had to cut ties when I ran. I couldn't take the chance that my uncle would use her to find me. She was safer if she didn't know anything, and so was I.

I knew what Meg would say anyway. She would tell me to take a chance with Xander and offer my heart. She would say it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Damn. I could hear her saying it in my head.

I was thinking of going for a walk to clear my head. I had already gotten dressed in some jeans, my riding boots, a long sleeve thermal, and my dad's crew jacket. I was going to grab my phone when my bedroom door opened, and there he was.

"Xander," I muttered, surprised, and he smirked at me. He wasn't in his bathing suit anymore. Jeans, a black long-sleeve shirt, and his crew vest. God, he was so handsome. I loved the scruff on his face and how it complimented his scar and bad boy look.

"Hey, beautiful." He slipped inside, and I stared at him with disbelief.

"What are you doing up here?" I was getting a bit suspicious, but I pushed it down.

"I'm about to head out. Liam is drunk near the pool with his band. Do you want to come along?" He nodded in the direction of the driveway, and I took a minute to think.

Xander hadn't done anything wrong. Even when he grabbed me in the pool, his hand felt so good. I was getting worked up again just thinking about it. His hands. His mouth. His tongue. shit. I was wet again.

My inner Meg voice was right. I didn't know what would happen with Xander until I went for it, and I would eventually do it anyway. He had such power over me.

"Where to?" I asked, and he grinned.

"You'll see. Come on," he urged and extended his hand to me. I took it quickly, and he grinned at me as he led me downstairs. The party had mostly come inside except for Liam and his band. They were still on the porch, but everyone else was in the living room, laughing and drinking.

"Jen!" Danica waved at me from her seat on Trip's lap, and I smirked.

She was a sweet girl. She was a whore, but still, nice girl. We could be friends for sure. I was curious about one thing. What was up with her and Trip? Danica was clinging to him all evening, but she was unclaimed. Was there something going on there? I wasn't sure. Maybe Trip was just her favorite of the guys. I could understand that. Trip was handsome with his short blonde hair, green eyes, and toned physique. It was no surprise that Danica would attach herself to him.

"We're heading out. Don't wreck Liam's house," Xander shouted out an order, and everyone's eyes fell to his hand around mine. The men all looked away, but the girls gave me a big, congratulatory grin.

"Have fun, Jenny!" Laura cheered, and maybe, I was a tad embarrassed that everyone knew that I was, kind of, Xander's girl. We'd see what happened.

Xander guided me to his bike that was parked down the street. He hopped on, and I got on behind him, gripping my hands on his waist.

“Have you been on a bike?" I laughed at his question.

"Since before I could walk. I'm more comfortable on a bike than a car. Do you have any idea how many more cars get in accidents than motorcycles? It's a scary thought." He chuckled softly from my response.

"I concur, babe." Then, we were off.

Xander drove for about an hour. We went down some winding dirt roads through the thick cover of trees until we got to what looked like some farmland.

There was a decently sized cabin at the front of the property aged with dents and discoloration to the wood and a red barn covered in rust that was closed up. The place was mostly deserted except for some pigs and a cornfield.

"Where are we?" The place was peaceful. It wasn't calming or serene. A normal person would've been scared off by the vibe the place gave off. I got the sense that some sinister things had gone down there and that didn't worry me. The disturbing nature of the land brought a sense of calm to me. I felt at home there.

Xander parked the bike next to the blue Silverado I recognized from the bar, and we settled down on the top of an old wooden picnic table near the cabin covered in carvings into the wood and blood stains. The table was almost completely red like Xander had used blood bags to stain it that color.

"My place," he explained, and I slowly nodded. "It used to be the original private clubhouse when my dad was alive." I watched him, as he stared at the barn. "It's a pretty freaky place, huh?" he joked, and I slowly shook my head.

"Not to me. It's a bit relaxing. It's got this vibe to it. One that says something bad happened here. My dad used to take me places like this all the time. He'd play a little game with it. Guess How Many People Died Here." He chuckled.

"Damn. Are we fucked up or what?"

"No, it's our upbringing. Who doesn't get fucked up growing up in a biker club?" He slowly nodded.

"Touche. Explains why my little brother wants nothing to do with it. It freaked my ex out when I told her that I didn't want kids. Who wants to bring a kid into this shit when you've seen the kind of shit we have?" A little more insight into Xander than I expected.

He didn't want children which was a bit of a clash. I did. Someday. Maybe in another five years.

"I think both of our parents just did it wrong. They weren't careful enough. I think it's possible to raise a kid in this and not screw them up." I shrugged, nonchalantly.

"Maybe. I mean, Bruce might have a chance there. Maybe he's actually doing it right." I looked at Xander, confused.

"I thought Bruce was just like a brother?" I asked, and he chuckled.

"Bruce is a complicated situation. It's hard to explain. This is actually where Bruce became a part of the organization." He motioned to everything, and I nodded.

"Out here?"

"Yeah."

"What's the story there?" His face lost its expression, as he pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

"Sally was married before Bruce. It was over ten years ago. The guy she had been married to was harassing her. I didn't ask questions. I had a rule out for a while. If Bruce Mayes needs something, do it. No questions asked. When he went to my brother with his problem, Austin came to me." I slowly nodded.

"Sally's pregnancy was rough. Her life was put in danger by the smallest amount of stress, and her ex stressed her out. Most guys would've done anything to protect their girl and their kids, but Bruce had always been this squeaky clean kid. He was a protective little shit, but not a dark person," he explained, then looked at me like he thought I might stop the story. No, I wanted to hear it. Maybe it made me dark, but I liked stories like this.


"Keep going," I egged him on and laced my fingers through his. He gave me a cute little smirk before looking back at the barn.

"The situation was complicated because the guy was also his brother-in-law. My guys had to wait until Bruce's sister wasn't around to grab him. They brought him here, and we all waited for Bruce to get here. When Bruce arrived, I saw a completely different side to him than I have ever seen. I can name three times in my life where I saw someone take their time like that. He made a lot of my men cringe. I think Trip might've puked." I nodded along with what he was saying.

"Well, some people would go to great lengths to protect the people they love." He smirked at me from that, and I flushed.

"His uncle was my dad's first VP until he passed away. I gave him his uncle's crew vest. He's not a biker, but he's one of us. He's like a brother. The whole chapter sees him that way."


"You should. Sometimes the darkest shit bonds people." He took a drag off his cigarette before throwing it on the ground.

"You can say that again. You know, you're a bit wise for your age." I rolled my eyes. For my age?

"What am I supposed to be?" I then turned to him and got my best teenie bopper voice. "Oh, my god, Xander. That is just so gross. I'm out. I'm heading to the club now." He laughed at my crack on my generation.

"Real cute," he uttered between cackles, and I smirked.

"If I ever start acting like that, you have my permission to shoot me," I joked, and he squeezed my hand. "Or better yet, send me back to the desert. I'm sure my uncle would love to do it himself," I mumbled, and he looked at me curiously.

"What is his problem with you?"

"I'm guessing Bruce told you my story?" I answered his question with another.

"Not quite sure how much of it. It seemed pretty rough." I nodded and pulled my lips into a tight line. I had told the story already but it was harder with it being Xander. I didn't want him to think I was broken by what happened. I wasn't. I was fine. He deserved to know though.

"The crew had been on my dad's back to name someone to take over after him. He avoided it for a while. I'm not sure why. I think he just didn't want to think about what would happen to everyone once he was gone or just the idea of him dying. He wouldn't talk about it with me," I explained, and he nodded. "My dad talked to me about a lot of shit that bothered him, but not that. It even surprised me when he announced that he wanted me to take over for him." He didn't say anything, just listened.

"You know just as well as I do that he was asking for trouble. The whole chapter broke into an uproar over it. People were split. There were quite a few that thought it might be a good idea, changing up the culture of the club. Most of them didn't feel that way though. Some thought I had brainwashed him, but I never wanted to take over. I even told my dad that after he made the announcement. He said he didn't have any sons and wasn't going to let it leave the family. 'It has to be you, Jennifer.' That's what my dad said.

"My uncle and the parts of the club loyal to him executed my dad for naming me the heir. It sucked, losing him. My mom died ten years ago, and my dad was all I had left, other than my uncles and cousins and Liam, but I understood why Crack did it. My dad obviously lost his mind, and Crack saw it as him risking the club's future.

"Crack called me to the club's bar for a meeting. I wasn't sure what it was for. I went anyway. I was pretty much ambushed by half the crew. I ran and now here I am." I skipped over my uncle commanding my attempted gang-rape. It wasn't necessary. "Crack thinks he can't completely take over the chapter if I'm alive, so he put a hit out on me. As long as I stay far away from there, I should be safe. He doesn't know about Liam, so he has no reason to look here for me." I shrugged and slipped off my jacket, setting it in my lap. He looked at me curiously, his eyes hazy.

"Is that your dad's crew jacket?" I slowly nodded.

"It's all I have left of him," I admitted and lifted the locket from under my shirt. "This is all I have left of my mom. She gave it to me right before she died. My dad pretty much killed her without pulling the trigger. It's kind of sad really." He squeezed my hand with a frown across his face.

"What do you mean?" he asked, with the softest voice I had ever heard from a full-grown man.

"She killed herself," I admitted, and his eyes widened. "She didn't know my dad was a biker when she met him. He kept that pretty well hidden, and his crew as well, until she was pregnant with me. Then, he dropped it all on her. Even though he had her, he was constantly screwing around on her with the girls which is a bit why I'm an only child. She said as long as he was fucking around on her, she refused to Fuck him. That argument didn't always end well for her, and I had to see it a lot." He wrapped an arm around my shoulder, as I sighed. "He broke her heart constantly for seventeen years. She couldn't take it anymore, so she killed herself. I found her, and my dad didn't bat an eyelash at it." I tried to shrug, but I knew I wasn't fooling him. My mom was the one person I ever loved and wanted to save, but I couldn't. My face fell and I felt his arms move around me supportive.

"Jen...." I slowly shook my head.

"It was a long time ago."

"That doesn't matter. That was your mom."

"That's what it's like being raised in the club, Xander. You know that. Some people can handle it. Others can't. My mom was just one of the people that couldn't. shit happens." I tried to brush it off, but he didn't let me.

"Jen, don't downplay it. My mom went through some shit, too. My mom wasn't married to my dad. My mom was a mouse." What?

"What?" He slowly nodded.

"Yup. My mom got knocked up. She got a DNA test done, and it proved who my father was, but it just was dumb luck that my dad was the president. Austin has a different father. His dad was.....was Bruce's uncle." I nodded him along. "Growing up as the kid of a mouse isn't quite that glamorous since after having me, she was still expected to....service....the crew. Even with me and Austin in the room. Sometimes, she would just get dragged off into a room and come out half an hour later beaten to a bloody pulp." Oh. My. God. "You want to know why I run my organization different than the others? That's why." That made me look at Xander in a different light. He wasn't a monster like other bikers. He had a heart, and he cared about others genuinely.

That made it even harder to guard my heart.

"Um, I think I should go." I needed to get away from him, or I would be in worse trouble than I already was. I could feel myself starting to linger on the edge, and I needed to pull myself back.

I grabbed my jacket and started walking toward his bike with my emotions starting to get the best of me. Why the hell couldn't I guard myself against Xander? My walls just came down around him, and I couldn't push him away. Damn it. He was the one who drove me out here. I had no idea how to get back to Liam's house.

“Why do you keep doing that?" I stopped when I heard his voice from behind me. Tears were clouding my eyes, and I was fighting with everything in me. "Why do you keep pulling back and running off? I know you feel the same way as me. I can see and feel it, Jen. Why the hell are you running from me?" I turned to him with frustration.

"Because I can't become my mom!" He looked hurt by what I said, and it sent a pain through my gut. "I've survived twenty-seven years by doing everything not to get in the position she was in. I don't date bikers, I don't do relationships longer than a couple of weeks, and I definitely don't let myself get knocked up by some guy I don't even know. I don't give my heart away, and that's the way I like it. It's what I'm comfortable with. Not this, Xander. This is not comfortable for me. I don't know anything about you, and for some reason, I...." I had to cut myself off before I started crying. I couldn't cry. I wouldn't. I was a strong, independent woman. Why the hell was he getting to me?

"You what?" He strolled over to me as I cringed, trying to get my emotions in check, but they wouldn't calm down. "You want this. You want to feel like this, and you want me." I gulped, and went to object, but Xander kissed me, pulling me close against him.

It wasn't one of desire, but one of caring and devotion and determination. I felt myself losing this battle of wills and, like I always knew, Xander was winning. He would always win this battle.