Chapter 9

The first lash of the cruel whip licked across my back like a branding iron.

I bit down hard on my lip, stifling the scream that tried to tear from my throat. Blood filled my mouth from the self-inflicted wound, but I refused to grant Karl the satisfaction of hearing me cry out.

The warm wetness began trickling down my skin as the next biting stroke landed. And the next. And the brutal lashing continued in cold, methodical precision.

By the fifth punishing blow, the pain had transcended from searing agony to an almost numb, tingling detachment. My back felt like it was on fire, yet also impossibly cold and distant from my mind.

My eyelids slipped closed as I retreated somewhere deep within myself to escape it all. Out there in the cold, harsh world, I might have been a captive receiving savage punishment before her jeering captors. But in here, in the quiet sanctum of my innermost zone, I was finally at peace again.

Images and sensations began creeping in, layered over my self-imposed mental isolation. Brief impressions at first, like stray thoughts carried on random winds. Then steadily they grew more visceral, more real, as though I wasn't merely imagining them but actually experiencing the moments as living memories.

A tiny, frail boy seated before an enormous beast of a man with cruel, disdainful eyes that raged as he beheld his trembling offspring. Meaty hands clenched into fists that struck out in disappointment and disgust.

"You shame me and this pack with your weakness, runt. A pathetic, mewling excuse for a Lycan alpha soon to inherit this territory's legacy. Useless!"

Another vicious crack of disciplinary violence crashing down, eliciting a whimpering sob of anguish muffled against my will. Hot tears streaked my youthful face as the boy inside cringed into a tighter, more protective ball under the relentless rain of abuse.

Then just as abruptly, the scene shifted to another flickering recollection. Now the boy had blossomed into adolescence, yet the bitter taunts and hateful sneers had only intensified in lockstep with his physical growth.

"My dear little brother, the mighty heir apparent!" a mocking voice rang out, delivering sarcasm dripping like acid. "Bah, the runt still can't even seed his first shift. Just as useless as when he was a helpless, squalling pup."

The young man's eyes squeezed shut even tighter, trying in vain to shut out the humiliation of his peers and elders. Jeering laughter assailed him from all sides, hammering as painfully as any bludgeoning fist.

"But we shouldn't judge the poor dear too cruelly, my pack," the mocking continued unabated. "After all, what can you expect from the bastard offspring of that filthy camp whore who--"

"Enough!"

The single bark of volcanic rage barely contained exploded from the young man's throat. His body began shifting and convulsing, flesh and bone re-knitting into something far more primal and powerful than any mere human form.

The gathering crowd's laughter died in abrupt, terrified silence as a towering beast erupted among them. One with claws like serrated blades, fangs capable of rending steel, and muscles honed over years of carrying rage and hatred like lead weights on his very soul.

When the haze finally faded from his eyes, the newly-birthed wolf realized his view was stained crimson with the blood and gore of those who tormented him. Some instinct screamed for him to recoil in horror...but a dark, profoundly damaged part of him had never felt so sickeningly vindicated.

The vision faded as abruptly as it had manifested. I felt myself drifting back to full awareness with a groggy slowness, like waking from a disturbing dream.

My back felt ripped to tattered shreds, every inch consumed in throbbing, unbearable pain. Distantly, I could hear the uproarious cheers and excited howls. All around me, leering faces regarded the spectacle with eager bloodlust and sheer, twisted entertainment.

As my gaze finally refocused in the present, I found myself staring across the space at Karl. Our eyes locked for an endless, silent moment.

In his pale orbs, I glimpsed a haunted knowledge and self-awareness that ran soul-deep. A clear understanding of the scarred, vicious beast he had become - and perhaps even a profound guilt and self-loathing in the deepest recesses of his psyche.

Yet on the surface, his expression stayed singularly implacable and utterly devoid of remorse. A chilling act of projection to keep his pack in fearful awe, lest they ever see the fraught vulnerability simmering inside him the same way I now did.

In that instant, even with my entire being screaming for retribution upon my tormentor, I felt a flicker of something altogether different begin to kindle. Understanding, perhaps? Not quite acceptance or compassion yet, but some crucial first ember to those far deeper concepts.

This was not a simplistic tale of a sadistic, power-mad alpha reveling in his own cruelty. Not entirely. Karl's fuse might have been tragically lit long ago by the incessant abuses and denigrations of his childhood. And his vicious lashings out might simply be unconscious efforts to fortify his wounded, self-loathing soul through fear and domination.

The flicker threatened to turn into a tiny flame inside me. One capable of granting the smallest glimpse into understanding the profoundly damaged human beneath the monster he presented to his world.

Just as quickly as it arrived though, the spark was brutally snuffed out again. The sharp, spiteful bark of cruel female laughter pierced the veil of my thoughts like a blade.

"Look at her, the little bitch dares imagine she's worthy of our alpha's attention!" Gia's snarling taunt sliced through the fragile moment of connection I'd felt with Karl. "That arrogance needs to be bled from her completely."

Then from out of nowhere, a fresh explosion of torturous pain blossomed across my lacerated back. I couldn't stifle the guttural scream that ripped free as the braided leather bit mercilessly into my already-mangled flesh once more.

While my body thrashed and vision whited out, the last thing searing itself into my mind's eye was the memory of Karl simply standing there watching impassively as my torment escalated further.

My final slivers of understanding and empathy for his grim existence evaporated as swiftly as smoke in a windstorm. In that moment, I hated the alpha with every fiber of my being for what he put me through without the faintest flinch of conscience.

As the darkness finally rushed up to claim me, I swore a savage vow that no matter what it took, I would escape this nightmare and have my vengeance upon Karl. Even if I had to burn his entire twisted world to the ground to do it.