Chapter Eighteen-The Wedding

I tied the closure for my dark burgundy wrap dress at the side of my chest and looked in the mirror. For the first time since I was a child, I didn’t look like I was on my way to a funeral, and I laughed at how uncomfortable it made me feel.

I wore black every day of my life; it was my uniform. It comforted me and shielded me from having to make decisions. But this was my brother, so I left my comfort zone for a little while to look normal for him.

The amber vial came to my lips as I sucked back another dose of potion for good measure. I generally stick to women and humans during my fertile time, and I was afraid this Lycan assault on my uterus might actually take.

During this particularly insane phase of my life, the last thing I needed was to bring a baby or two into the world. So I made sure to take the proper precautions. It was the one responsible action I was able to muster in my daily life.

I wasn’t sure what I’d be walking in on this morning, so I stalled as much as possible before I finally opened the door and crept out into the hall. When I heard the chuckles and smelled the coffee coming from the kitchen, I realized everyone was at least speaking to each other, and I peeked around the kitchen door.

Despite all his declarations of love and commitment the previous evening, I didn’t even get a look from Logan when I came to the kitchen. But Jacob was always at the ready with a long hug and kiss on my cheek no matter what was going on between us. “Wow, you look amazing.”

“Thanks.” I slid onto the barstool beside my brother and snatched his coffee from him.

After I took a drink, he reclaimed it and finished it off. “You are going to play nice today, aren’t you?”

I took the piece of toast from his plate and bit off the edge. “I’ll be your better-looking half as usual.”

I don’t know if it was because of the hormonal war my body was waging or that Logan looked so good today it hurt. Still, I got a little choked up at his indifference towards me.

He wore a black suit with a matching tie and a dark gray shirt. His blonde hair was slicked back off his face, and he seeped power from every pore. I just wanted to strip naked and throw myself down in front of him, there on the kitchen floor. 

His fingers tapped the counter in front of us, and his head tilted to the door. ‘We better get going.”

Teddy looked at his Rolex. “Right.” Logan held the door open and slapped at the opener on the wall as Teddy looked at me and straightened his tie. “How do I look?”

My tongue clicked as I tugged the tie in place. He never could quite get it straight.

I went back to my thirteenth birthday in my mind. It was just like Daddy was staring down at me with his curly hair and green eyes. It was one of the last memories of him I could recall. A burn rose up my throat, and my eyes filled. I was wearing too much mascara to deal with crying, so I batted the tears away and blew a blast of air into my lashes. “You’ll be the belle of the ball.”

I slapped his cheek with my fingertips twice before I took his jaw between my fingers. “Wherever they are right now, know that Momma and Daddy are happy for you. They’d be so proud of the man you turned out to be.”

His eyes fell between us, and a big tear dropped to the floor by my shoe. I thumbed his lip, and he glanced back at me. “This static between us, it’s me, not you. You’re a wonderful brother. I’m just not built for this world.”

He sniffed and nodded because he knew it was true. I’d try to wiggle my way out of this world more than once with my self-destructive behavior, drug abuse, and drinking, but Teddy always brought me back. I was searching for death, but he never would show his fucking face to me.

He gave me a quick smile and kissed my cheek. “We belong together, Tess. Remember that. This is your family. There’s nothing important waiting on you back in Savannah anymore. It’s just a bad memory that you need to let go of.”

Jacob’s hand met my back and led me to the car, then held tight to my hand in the backseat. When we got to the back garden, I left them all and went directly for the bar.

As the bartender set my drink in front of me, Logan appeared in the mirror, and I nodded as I sipped on my glass. “Are we speaking now, or…”

His eyes met mine for just a moment before he lifted his chin to the bartender. “Whiskey, neat.” He dipped down to the chair beside me and his fingers wrapped around mine. “Of course, we are.”

“Oh.” I lifted my brows and chomped on the ice. “See, I get confused about all that when you spend all morning ignoring me.” I chuckled and wiggled my fingers beside my ear. “Call me crazy.”

His knuckle moved down my arm, and by the way he said it, I could tell that he was trying to protect me from the truth. It’s a shame. I could have put a stop to what was coming for us with a phone call if he’d just told me right then. “I just got some things on my mind. Pack stuff.”

After he slammed his drink in a single swallow. His hand wrapped around my elbow. “Come on, let’s go take our seats.” 

Sandwiched between the two of them, I could barely breathe as Logan wrapped his arm around the back of my chair, and Jacob held my hand on his lap.

The little curls around my neck wrapped around Logan’s fingers as they caressed my skin, and Jacob made sure every inch of my cheek was adequately covered in kisses. I nearly vomited from their dueling displays of affection.

In the privacy of our home, we rarely did anything together as the three of us. But their harem style of living was an essential tenet of pack life. As backward as these people were, even the women who were lucky enough to be born mates to multiples were allowed to enjoy more than one lover. It was the one time there was some measure of equality.

The way they were all over me was an act. One meant to prove to everyone watching that we were all happy. That a threesome was a good thing. That their Alpha would protect their way of life, even if it was contrary to what he really wanted.

I felt like everyone was watching us, and when I looked around, I was right. Every eye scoured me, and when I met the ones that belonged to the redhead, a cold flash of pain stabbed at my head before the itch came to my nose.