Part 25~Past Mistakes~

Part 25 ~Past Mistakes~



Donovan stood silently, hidden behind a wall of climbing roses inside the garden area of the castle. He watched his youngest brother smile contently at the woman his heart now belonged to. He knew the look his brother had in his eyes.....he had seen it before and it caused a sickness to settle in the pit of his gut....he was falling in love with her.
Donovan couldn't confront Shandy here....in front of Devin. The younger sibling would no doubt wanna start shit with him... especially since Shandy was anything but happy with him right now, and of course Devin was looking for any reason to cause more drama between them.
He'd have to wait until she was alone, so his little brother wouldn't be capable of hindering any progress they may be able to ascertain.
Devin wrapped his arm around Shandys waist as she smiled happily pointing out the many stunning flowers surrounding them, enjoying the beauty of the indoor garden causing Donovan's blood to reach boiling point seeing his kid brother that wasn't such a kid anymore so close to the female that the gods themselves had chosen for him.
He gritted his teeth and balled his fists tightly, wanting to rush over and knock the hell outta him. Yet he held his temper, which took a great deal of effort.
10 minutes passed as he stood watching the two of them chat joyfully. He could hear nothing they were saying because of the babbling of water from the many fountains inside the garden room.
Devin suddenly shuffled away, turning and holding up a finger, letting her know he'd return quickly. Donovan knew that his father must have had something to do with Devins sudden departure.This was his chance to try and talk to her without the interference of his brother. He walked to Shandy, her back turned to him lost in the beauty of the garden.
He gently placed his hand on her shoulder, startling her.
"D....Donovan, wh...what do you want?" She snapped, giving him a sharp look.
"Shandy....can we please talk? I...I really need to explain some things to you. Will you talk privately with me later, please? He asked moving closer to her as she backed away from him, causing his heart to sink.
"Yes....you're right...we do need to talk. There's a lot I need to explain to you as well." She sneered.
"Ok...uhm can we meet in an hour inside my room?" He asked, staring into her cold eyes.
"Mhm sure, I'll see you later, now leave me alone until then. Besides, I'm sure you'd rather be chasing all your many lovers around." She shot. A fire burning in her eyes.
Donovan didn't say another word as he turned to walk out of the garden area passing Devin in the large arched doorway as he left.
"What the fuck are you doing here prick!? The younger spat causing Donovan to halt his steps.
"I have as much right to be here...if not more than you.....don't give me any problems baby brother, or you might not like the end result. Back off or I swear...the consequences will be anything but pleasant." Donovan glared at him with flaming red rage in his eyes, then walked away without another word.
"Fuck you! Maybe you'd do best to back off! She doesn't want you anymore!" Devin roared out.
Donovan just kept slowly walking away with his teeth grinding. He certainly did not want to cause anymore issues, nor disappoint his father any further than he already had by fighting his brother and hoped it wouldn't come down to that again. But if Devin continued to try and destroy what he and Shandy were destined to have together....there would undoubtedly be an all out war between them.
Later in the evening Donovan sat in his room, feet propped up on an ottoman, his head laid back rubbing his temples still trying to recover from his reckless night of sucking on a liquor bottle with Jayzon rooting him on. God what a foolish mistake that had been.
It was nearing time for Shandy to come and speak with him. He was extremely nervous about opening up to her, yet he would.... because he was hopelessly in love with this girl.
He never believed he could actually feel this way for someone, and want her happiness before his own, however it had happened and he couldn't see himself without her. She completed him in every way and he'd be damned to the pits of hell if he'd let anyone steal that from him, least of all his very own sibling.
He'd have to make her believe that his past was behind him and he wanted no one else but her, which was true. He had to repair the damage Devin had caused, and could only imagine all he had told her, other than what he already knew his vengeful little brother had enlightened her with.
He prayed to the God's he could convince her that his love for her was true....that he wasn't the same philandering playboy that had left this kingdom some months ago when his journey had begun. He had been determined that no one would ever be worth changing his lifestyle for....until her.
All his thoughts were of her.....her happiness....her touch....her love. He needed to hold her, he missed her terribly, ached for the warmth of her love that encased him in such brilliant beauty. Nothing he had ever experienced came close to this perfect little lady, with a heart that was as beautiful as she herself was.
He would admit to all his faults & wrongdoings that he so abundantly wished he could change. His father had always cautioned him that his foolish behavior would create nothing but great sorrow, and indeed, it had been proven so.
Donovan stood walking to his door when he heard the faint tapping. Shandy stood looking down at the floor as he beckoned her to enter. She was quiet.....too quiet and it worried him more than he wanted to admit.
She wasn't arguing as he had figured she would do. She walked inside purposely avoiding any eye contact with him at all.
"Can....can you come and sit please?" He tried to pull her attention to him, yet she kept denying his gaze.
She sat on the small loveseat opposite the chair he sat in.
"Donovan....I do not want to marry you. I am sorry but I will not reduce myself to the likes of a man that has shared himself with so many." She replied clearly, still avoiding his evident stare on her.
"Ex....excuse me?....I...I don't believe I heard you correctly. Did you seriously just say you didn't want to marry me because of my past?" He shot up from his seat.
"Y...yes that is precisely what I said!. I j...just can not spend the rest of my days chained to a man that has so carelessly bedded nearly every female in this kingdom! It's disgusting! Vile! And as wicked as the devil himself! Knowing most every woman I pass by that resides in this land may have been a conquest of yours!" Shandy stopped to take in an unsteady breath, trying her best to compose herself with some sense of dignity.
"Th...this can not be happening! You can't....you can't just do this Shandy! Please tell me this is some kinda sick twisted joke....I'm not who I once was and you're holding my past against me...your....you're basically telling me that my love for you means nothing and that the love you professed to me was a Goddamn lie! Otherwise my past wouldn't matter to you! Fuck no! No! No! No!" Donovan boomed in the quiet stillness of the room, his face filled with pain and anger all at once.
Shandy sprung up quickly from her seat pointing an accusing finger in his direction. "Don't you fucking dare raise your voice at me!...Like....like this is all my damn fault! I heard what you said to that girl the other day! I was there! You told her she'd only need wait until after we we're married...you wanted to make sure to seal the deal....then you could go slithering back to your normal way of life...like the slug you are, and continue fucking all these....these dirty sluts in your harem! You're a despicable sickening man and I can not stand the sight of you any longer!" She huffed out with excessive fury, her face bright red, eyes pooling with tears.
Shandy moved swiftly to the door leaving him standing in a broken state before he could utter another word.
He didn't know what else to do....her words cut him to the bone. She....she hated him, was disgusted by him... She looked at him as sullied....unclean...a filthy male. He felt a weight land on his heart.....it was suffocating....like he was folding in on himself.
He fell back onto the couch tears began to drip from his eyes. He could not quell these emotions that seized every fiber of his being. He leaned forward, elbows on his knees, face in his hands.
Shame....for the first time in his life....he felt shame.
His heart twisted uncomfortably inside his chest, body shuddering as sobs crept up from his throat.
His breath caught painfully, he wanted to disappear, cease to exist. His body curled up in misery, while he anchored himself to a small pillow.