Chapter 47 - Nadia

I took another shower after Ryan left, and when I looked at myself in the mirror afterwards there was a huge smile on my face.
Anal had always been an erotic zone for me, but I’d never had more than a finger or small dildo inside. The real thing? It was a million times better. Hearing Ryan groan and tell me how good and tight my ass felt…
I shivered at the fresh memory. I was going to do a lot more of that in the future. And what I really couldn’t wait to try was double-penetration. If one cock was good, two had to be better. That was just simple math.
Ryan was gone by the time I changed and went downstairs. Braden was still out in the garden reading his lines, none the wiser. I couldn’t help but imagine his dick in my ass, while Ryan was fucking my pussy. Their two muscular bodies sandwiching me together, coming inside of me simultaneously…
Braden saw me through the window, and smiled. I gave an awkward little wave and then went into the pantry for that snack I’d originally come down for before getting sidetracked by Ryan. Thank goodness he couldn’t read my thoughts.
I relaxed on the couch for a while, then packed up my change of clothes. Braden was still out in the garden when I checked in on him.
“Hey, I’m heading to the theater,” I told him. “Wanna come with?”
He glanced at his watch and waffled. “Eh. I don’t want to get there too early because then I’ll just stand around staring at the Times writer. I’d rather hang out here until it’s time.”
“Braden Williams,” I said in disbelief. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were nervous.”
He smiled that gorgeous smile of his. “I am nervous. Want to trade parts? I’ll happily be a backup dancer for tonight.”
“I don’t think I have the muscles required for the shirtless scenes,” I teased. “Also, I’m not interested in kissing Tatiana.”
“Me neither.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Tatiana may be annoying, but she’s not ugly.”
He shrugged. “She’s not my type. I like her understudy a lot more. I’ll meet you there later.”
“Yeah, see you then,” I said, flustered by his compliment. Why did he have to tease my heart like that?
“You going over?” Dorian called down from the next floor. “Hold on and I’ll join you.”
A few minutes later we were walking to the train.
“Thanks for telling me about the roof,” I said. “It makes for a great fake-stage.”
“Only if the air conditioner isn’t in the way,” Dorian said with a grimace. “I swear, it’s always smack dab in the middle of whatever track I want to practice.”
“You could always flip which way you face,” I said. “Then it would become stage right instead of stage left.”
He blinked. “I, uh, never thought of that.”
I beamed up at him. “Good thing I’m here, then.”
We got on the train south and sat in silence for a while.
“Hey,” he said. “I’m sorry about the payment for—”
“Stop,” I said. I’d been waiting for this. “We need to stop apologizing to each other. I swear it’s all we’ve done in the past two days. I can’t deal with it.”
“Sorry—” he began, then cut off. “Force of habit. I’ll stop apologizing.”
“Neither of us have anything to apologize for,” I went on, staring at him intensely. “Even if the original agreement was to be platonic friends, neither of us can help if feelings develop. Or if they don’t develop. All of it is fine.”
“I know,” he said. “I’m just in a weird place. I’m mostly over my ex, but I’m still not confident enough to put myself out there without feeling uncomfortable. But I liked our kiss!”
I leaned into him. “Me too.”
We paused while someone shouldered past us in the aisle.
“You know what else has been on my mind?” he said. “I don’t know how the others would feel about it. We’ve all sort of declared our intentions up front, and for me to suddenly change it… What? What’s the matter?”
I must’ve been grimacing. I sighed and said, “I sort of, kind of, told the others about it already.”
“Seriously?”
“Andy and Ryan,” I clarified. “I don’t know if Braden knows.”
Dorian stared at the seat in front of him. “How’d they take it?”
“They didn’t seem to care. They’re not possessive at all.”
“Still,” Dorian sighed. “I don’t want to be the only one to—”
I grabbed his hand and squeezed hard enough to make him cut off. When he turned to face me I finally told him what he needed to know.
“Braden and I slept together.”
He gave a start. “What? When?”
“Technically, it was before I agreed to your weird four-person proposition,” I explained. “The night you all sprung it on me. Since then, things have been kind of weird between us. I… have feelings for him.” I shrugged. “I can’t help it. But it’s sort of there, lingering every day I live with you guys. And he said he has complicated feelings too. I’m droning on, but the point is that you’re not the first one to potentially change the agreement we all made.”
Dorian listened quietly. The train stopped at another station, people got off and on, and then the train moved again before he finally spoke.
“That actually does make me feel better.” Relief shone in his emerald eyes. “It doesn’t resolve how… I feel about you, but it makes me feel less guilty.”
I squeezed his hand in mine. “We can figure that out later. For now, I’m glad to have you as my friend.”
“Me too, Nadia.”
The cast was whispering excitedly when we arrived backstage at the theater. “Dorian!” one of the dancers said. “Did you hear? There’s a Broadway writer watching our rehearsal tonight!”
We peeked around the curtain into the audience. A lone man sat in the back row, texting on his phone. He looked to be in his 30s.
“Wow,” Dorian said. “I had no idea!”
I struggled to keep a straight face at his overly fake enthusiasm. I forgot that the rest of the cast didn’t know the writer was coming until they showed up tonight.
“Who invited him?” Tatiana asked. She had her arms crossed over her chest and a worried expression on her face.
“Atkins must have. Or the producer,” I said.
She didn’t react to me mentioning her grandfather. That was interesting. It meant he hadn’t told her about the Times writer ahead of time. Why would he spring it on her like that without a warning?
As Tatiana paced back and forth, I couldn’t help but sympathize with her. It was one thing to give a sucky performance on a random rehearsal night, but in front of someone who would write about it in one of the most circulated papers in the world…
“Hey!” she suddenly shouted, snapping her fingers at one of the backup dancers. “Please stay out of my field of view. I’m trying to get into the proper mindset for my solo tonight!”
And there goes my sympathy. I glanced at Dorian and he rolled his eyes.
Director Atkins mingled with the writer at the back of the theater while the rest of us performed our various warm-up stretches. Braden arrived smack dab on time, not a minute earlier.
Atkins came backstage and found Ryan. “How’s everything looking?”
“It’s a good security system,” Ryan replied. “I checked all the video from this afternoon. We’re clear.”
“Good.” Atkins jerked his head. “I still want you up in the catwalks during rehearsal. Just in case.”
“You got it, boss.” Ryan winked at me as he left to climb the ladder.
Rehearsal began. Atkins usually had us go straight into whatever song we were practicing, but tonight he stood on stage and made some comments about the last rehearsal two nights ago. Little things he wanted us to work on. He was very obviously putting on a show for an audience of one, but we all went along with it.
We took our places, and rehearsal began.
The first song Atkins had us rehearse was the last one from the previous rehearsal. It seems that he wanted us to start out strong with the writer by showing off one we had already practiced a few times. It was a fast-paced song involving Braden, Tatiana, and Dorian together. The two men occupied either side of the stage while Tatiana danced back and forth between them, alternating who she sang with.
Tatiana had not done a very good job of it during our last rehearsal, so as I danced around stage on my track I cringed as her opening lines approached. One bad review in the Times would be the end of The Proposition before it ever began, and Tatiana…
She started singing, and strode across the stage in line with her track. Her voice was perfectly in tune and loud enough to project across the theater. I locked eyes with the other backup dancers as we moved in the background; all of us appeared surprised. Tatiana was much better than normal. Still not amazing, but for her it was the best I’d ever seen her perform. Like she’d been half-assing all the rehearsals until now.
At least she’s taking the writer seriously. Now was the time to start.
As the song progressed and Dorian and Braden sang their parts, Tatiana only seemed to get stronger. Her feet were crisp as they followed her track around the stage, and she was never in anyone else’s way. She held her head high and belted her notes throughout the theater. For a full song it felt like we were in a real show rather than an off-Broadway dud.
Atkins applauded loudly when it was done, and Braden patted Tatiana on the back and whispered something I couldn’t hear that made her beam. The Times writer didn’t clap, but he did nod his head and write something down.
“Awesome job everyone,” Atkins announced, which we all knew meant Tatiana. “Let’s move on to the next song, More Than Money. Tatiana, do you want to take a breather? You crushed that last song, and Nadia can fill in for one run-through.”
I gave a start at his suggestion. Had someone told him how well I’d sung the song yesterday? I glanced up at Ryan in the catwalks, but he wasn’t looking at me.
Tatiana scowled. “Of course not. An understudy should not be the first to sing the big solo during rehearsal. I am ready.”
Atkins glanced at me, then turned around and shouted, “Do we have the lights prepared for the next one?”
From the booth at the back of the theater, Andy gave a thumbs-up.
“Places, everyone. Start the music whenever you’re ready, Andy.”
We took our spots in the back of the stage, while Braden and Dorian sat off to the side since they weren’t in this song. The music came up slowly, the opening melody before the lyrics began.
Tatiana’s voice boomed throughout the theater as she began the song. The track for the backup dancers was slow and subtle, allowing us to watch the lead actress move around the stage. I stared with shock. She was really performing fantastic, now. I met eyes with Dorian and he gave me a Can you believe this? look. I felt like I was being punked.
Maybe Tatiana was talented after all. She just refused to put forth any effort unless it really mattered. Now that I thought about it, that was the most diva thing someone could possibly do.
As Tatiana moved into the second verse of the song, I felt a strange mixture of emotions. Relief that the show might do better than before, and regret that I was now even less likely to step into the lead role. While practicing on the roof I’d allowed myself to hope that maybe I would get to replace Tatiana in the show. Now that hope was gone.
Tatiana was pulling something out of her ass that I’d never seen. There was real emotion and misery in her voice. It was every bit as good of a performance as I’d given yesterday with Ryan and Andy. Maybe even better.
No, it’s definitely better than me. There was no denying it now.
The entire cast was watching intently as Tatiana reached the climax of the song. That would be the real test of her skill now that she was giving 100% effort. The Times writer in the back row sat up straighter as he waited for it too.
Tatiana strode forward and took a deep breath before bellowing out the climactic verse. The first note cut the air flawlessly and full of emotion—
Something snapped underneath Tatiana.
A square of black appeared underneath the lead actress. The trapdoor leading to the sub-section below the stage. The note of the song Tatiana had been holding mutated into a shriek that echoed through the theater as she plummeted out of sight.