THIRTY SIX

Ashley helped herself up to properly look at the man beside her. “I am afraid you might be mistaken Doctor, what do you mean by pregnant?”

“You really aren’t aware of your state of pregnancy?”

“Does it look like I am?” Ashley asked almost angrily as she tried to put two and two together. It was definitely Dave’s. It without doubt his. But how? What could have happened? She was certain she took pills.

“In case you need to be sure, we can run the test again. Maybe then we could discuss options if you want to.”

“Options?”

“You might not desire to have a baby…”

“I don’t… I don’t think I need to discuss options.”

“You just seemed rather taken back by the news. That’s why I suggested…”

“I am really fine with it. If I am really pregnant, I am fine with it.” Even though it seemed like she would be raising the baby on her own, Ashley consoled herself with the fact that she would at least have someone around for a while. A child with whom she would make memories with. She finally would have a reason to laugh, someone to cry with, someone to have silly talks with.

It seemed like she finally found a replacement for Dave.

“Well, if you say so,” the tall man reached and patted her shoulder as she smiled dreamily while rubbing her stomach gently. “When you feel better, I will love to have a talk with you. Considering this is your first time being pregnant, there are a few things you need to know.”

Suddenly, she thought all over again about the journey. It really was going to be stressful, it was going to take a lot of strength. And she needed strength, physically and mentally, emotionally too since she was going to be alone. Sighing, she acknowledged the doctor and watched him leave the room.

Without delay, Tamara walked her way into the ward.
“Hi,” she quietly said as though there lay a delicate baby in the room who didn’t wish to be disturbed.
As she made it to Ashley’s side, she continued, a bit of guilt on her face, “I really wish things didn’t have to turn out this way for you. I promise boss,” Tamara hurriedly reached for her hand. “,I will try everything to make sure you don’t feel so alone during your pregnancy. I will really try my best.”

“In that case, you might actually become her god mother.”

“Really? But… can you tell that it is a girl?”

“No. But I would love for it to be a girl. But if it turns out to be a boy, I won’t mind. I will love him without complaining.”

“I am so glad you are being strong about this.” Tamara took in a deep breath before asking her next question. “Don’t you think you should tell him though?”

“He has a family already.”

“But… you need your baby’s father around. He can help…”

“I will be fine raising this baby on my own. I don’t need help from his father at all.”

“So you won’t let him know he has a child with you?”

“No. It is better that way.”

“What if your child grows up and starts to ask questions?”

“Tamara…” Her questions were realistic but she did not like them. “When that time comes, I will know how to go about it.”

“But…”

“I will love to rest now Tamara.”

“Sure.”

As Tamara made to get up, she recalled something. “Please could you ask Sasha to check the progress of my house reconstruction?”

“I will do that.”

“Thank you.” Ashley slipped properly into the bed, her hand still not leaving her stomach. And with her mind trying its best to not drive here and there, she began to imagine a future with the soul growing inside her. And she loved it.

~

Sighing as she took a step into her totally refurbished place which was feeling so strange, Ashley convinced herself that moving back in wasn’t that much of a bad idea. It was spacious enough to raise a baby.

And she was going to make sure the previous memories of the place didn’t haunt her.

As she dragged her luggage behind her, Ashley began to sort of miss Tamara’s place at which she had spent two months. Even though Tamara didn’t mind, Ashley felt like she really was imposing and that made her speed her house reconstruction.

Smiling at the thought of Tamara walking in at that point to cheer her out of her unnecessary thinking, Ashley could not help but feel appreciative towards her.

Dragging her bag further into the house, Ashley decided to staying downstairs would be the best thing. It could be stressful to keep climbing the stairs, all she had to do was find a way to get her stuff upstairs downstairs.

She felt a continuous buzz in her bag. On pulling out her rarely used phone, the caller ID staring back at her made her heart flip.

Two months after, Dave finally called her. Or rather, she finally saw his call. She was certain he had been trying to call on several occasions, but she had her phone switched off then.

Her fingers lingered over the phone as she debated whether to pick it or not. It had been so long. Even though she had managed to live the past months without incessantly thinking of him, she could not help but to think about him at random intervals.

Declining the call to her dismay, Ashley let out a breath she had sucked in.

“I am fine without him.” She touched her stomach. “We are fine without him. We will be fine here.” She managed a small smile.
“Welcome home baby” she whispered into the room and made for the stairs to get her stuff.

As her feet slowly helped her up the seemingly strenuous flight, Ashley heard a faint noise. It seemed as though she imagined it at first, but when it came the second time, it was certain she was not hallucinating.

Curiosity with a bit of fear coursing through her body, Ashley walked a bit faster to finally land on the floor that led to what used to be the abode of a seemingly happy couple.

Just as she was about to take a step into the study room, the familiar scent that her ex-husband carried around surfaced.
“Kevin? What are you doing here?”
He did not respond, instead he deepened his glare at her and that roused something in her. “What on earth are you doing here? What did you come to destroy this time?”

“Why did you lie?”

“Lie?” Ashley scoffed in disbelief of his ridiculous question. “What are you talking about? What stupid thing are you here to rant about?”

In swift response, Kevin brought his arm up to expose what his hand had been hiding. Jiggling the nylon in the air he said, “This is what I am talking about. These pills are what I am talking about.”

“What about them?”

“You lied to me about not being able to conceive all these while. You knew how much I wanted a child, yet you found it easy to deceive me by taking these God damn pills.”

“Excuse me. If you can recall well, I believe I rang it numerous times into your ears that I was not ready to have a child. But did you listen to me? No. And you are actually surprised that I used pills?”

“How…?”

“Why is the issue even freaking you out so much? You already married the woman you want right? Tell her to give you a child and don’t disturb my life anymore with your stupid drama.”

“How dare you?”

Ashley took a step back to properly express her surprise at his outburst. “In case you have forgotten, we are no longer married, so you don’t have the right to come into this place and shout at me.”

“Well, you ruined my wedding.”

“I ruined your wedding? I ruined your wedding? Kevin! You ruined your wedding! If you had looked away when you saw me coming out of the chapel that day, maybe you would be married by now.”

“How dare you…”

“You want to hit me? Go ahead. Just so you know, I have a baby inside me. So, go ahead and hit me.”

Kevin scoffed. “I can’t believe you actually have a baby for that man.”

“Please leave my house.”

“Ashley…”

She did not even let him finish his statement. “Leave. My. House!”

As though in a movie, as Kevin adhered to her request, his shoulder happened to furiously bump against hers and that caused her to lose her balance and she soon found herself staggering backwards.

As she tried to find balance, she discovered that she unfortunately had her feet almost falling of the first step of the stairs. Before Kevin could catch her, Ashley totally lost her grip and found herself falling down the flight of stairs.

As she furiously tumbled down the staircase, all that occupied Ashley’s mind was her baby. Her hand on her stomach, that was all she could focus on. From a distance, she heard a cry of distress and in her head, she felt like she just cried out loud. But all that mattered was her baby.

The beautiful soul inside her.

As soon as the unmerciful fall ended, Ashley found herself kissing the ground with a huge force. Her hand still clutching her stomach that lay flat on the ground, Ashley’s head began to feel light.

And as she hated the feeling that came with it, she decided to fight it. But that didn’t help at all. Instead, the force in her head kept pulling and pulling till she lost consciousness.

But before her eyes finally closed, for like a mini second, she felt a pair of hands trying to work her body back into life. For some reason, all it took were those hands and Ashley could not help but assure herself that she was going to be fine. That the baby was going to be fine.

If Dave was really the one right beside her.