Chapter Thirty Nine

Chapter 39

Jemima connected her palm with Alan's cheeks as she slapped him across the face, causing passers-by to gasp incredulously.

"Jem!" Jay gasped, stepping in between her and Alan but Jemima shoved him aside as she continued to glare at Alan.

"How could you?" Jemima retorted spitefully as she gazed at him venomously with tears brimming at the corner of her eyes. She was disappointed in Alan, to say the least.

"Jem, I'm sorry!" Alan tried to apologize, not knowing what else to say. Jemima scoffed, glancing up at the ceiling as she punched the bridge of her nose in an attempt to stop the tears from falling.

"Where is Jon?" Jemima demanded to know, not bothering to acknowledge his apology.

"Jem, please," Alan tried to plead with her as he momentarily locked his gaze with Jay who just stood there, watching the duo intently.

"Where the fuck is he Alan?" Jemima screamed as she reiterated her question.

"Please ma'am, I implore you to be quiet. This is a hospital," a matron who approached them muttered sternly, fixing Jemima a stern glance.

"We are sorry for the trouble ma'am," Jay apologized with a flawless charm that caused the matron to smile to widen.

"Come with me," Alan stated, causing Jemima to follow him. Jay placed his arm across Jemima's shoulder as they walked towards Jon's ward but not wanting to receive any form of comfort from anybody, Jemima shrugged off his touch.

Jay sighed in exasperation as Jemima repelled all forms of affection he had tried to show her.
They all walked to the ward in silence as each of them became engrossed in their thought.

The tension in the air became palpable as they approached Jon's ward. Jemima's gaze landed on Jon's frail figure as he lay in the hospital bed, clad in a white garment.

"Jon!" Jemima gasped as she rushed to his bedside, kneeling before him. She bent her head and rested it gently against his body, tears welling up in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't here sooner Jon, I'm so sorry," Jemima whispered, taking his hands into hers as she rubbed his knuckles with her thumb soothingly.

"When did you guys get here?" Alan inquired of Jay, eliciting a tired yawn from him.

"A few hours ago," Jay replied curtly, causing Alan to nod his head in comprehension.

"Why didn't anyone tell me you were coming?" Alan queried, raking his fingers through his hair as he stared at Jemima who was still kneeling beside Jon. Jemima hearing this, abruptly stood up to face Alan.

"Why? So you can keep this away from me? How long has this been Alan?" Jemima accused, glaring at him venomously as she clenched her fist. It was then she finally took note of his appearance, noting how scruffy he looked. Eye bags and dark circles colored the corners of Alan's eyes, indicating that he was sleep-deprived. His hair was disheveled and his skin was flushed red from exhaustion.

Alan stifled a yawn as he struggled to reply to Jemima, "I deeply apologize for not telling you about Jon's condition Jem," Alan simply apologized, rubbing off remnants of sleep that laced his eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jemima quizzed as she threw up her hands into the air, unable to hold her disbelief and exasperation any longer. Tears began streaming down her face and Jay watched on, hoping there was not going to be any physical encounter between them again.

"I tried!" Alan whispered, his voice laced with trepidation as he stared into Jemima's eyes. He took a step towards her but she moved back, not wanting him to get closer to her.

Silence engulfed them, prompting the beeping of the monitors to become distinct. The sun had just begun to set and it illuminated the walls of the ward through the window with its orange hue. Alan noticed how her honey-colored eyes became more pronounced as the glimmering rays of the sun reflected in them. He saw the consternation in her eyes and all he wanted to do was to hold her and tell her how deeply sorry he was.

Feet of people shuffling in the background served as a symphony of backdrop against the ticking clock and beeping machine in the ward.

"You never did!" Jemima insisted, her voice piercing through the thick atmosphere that had enveloped them.

"Yes, Jemima! I did! I tried to tell you so many times in Rome but you were so engrossed with Jay you couldn't even see it. When I couldn't muster up enough strength to tell you, I wanted you to come back with me but you stayed in Rome for reasons best known to you. You have always been too self-absorbed to see someone else's struggles! How else was I supposed to tell you Jon had a heart attack the minute he heard you were kidnapped without you blaming yourself?” Alan yelled, his emotions getting the best of him as he sniffed away the rest of the tears that had formed in the corner of his eyes. There was a pause, Jemima’s breath becoming shallow.

“Exactly! And that’s the difference between me and you. I considered your feelings and what you might go through,” Alan stated with a clipped tone, the veins in his neck pulsating with fury.

"Alan!" Jemima exclaimed, surprised at his outburst. Jay shifted his glance from Jemima to Alan, wondering what was going on.

"You just never considered me as part of your family!" Jemima muttered, her cheeks flushed red from all the emotions she was feeling at that moment.

"I did Jem! I always did! I overlooked your self-centered nature, I overlooked how you always play the victim, I overlooked everything for you because I love you!" Alan confessed, causing Jemima to widen her eyes as she stared at him. She couldn't believe what she had just heard, causing her to leave her mouth agape.

"I should excuse the both of you," Jay said as he got up to leave the ward but Jemima shot him a deadly gaze, prompting him to return to his seat.

“Typical Alan! Always trying to gaslight me! But you know what, I’m not even going to give you the benefit of a reaction,” Jemima stated defiantly, shoving Alan aside as she sat down by Jon’s bed.

The ward fell silent, causing the beeping of the monitors to become distinct. Jay glanced at Alan who raked his hands through his hair in exasperation before stomping out of the ward.

Jemima, feeling Alan’s absence finally let out a deep sigh of anxiety. What Alan had said had rattled her. She did not expect him of all people to utter such disparaging words to her. Her lips quivered as she tried to control her emotions and steady her breathing. She took Jon’s hands in hers and slowly stroked it.

Jay got up from his seat, the soles of his shoes clacking against the tiled floor as he approached Jemima. He placed a hand on her shoulder and closed his eyes, waiting for her to shrug it off but she didn’t.

“Jem, you don’t have to get defensive about stuff all the time you know,” Jay started to say, prompting Jemima to whip her head towards his direction as she wondered where he was going with this conversation.

“What do you mean?” Jemima inquired, casting him an annoyed look.

“Alan was right about the whole thing. You don’t know what he has been through these last few weeks with Jon. This is his father in the hospital bed. I admit, he should have told you but he considered your happiness over his troubles…” Jay declared, watching her intently to see if she comprehended what he was saying.

“Him doing that makes me feel like he doesn’t consider me a part of his life, considering how long we’ve spent together,” Jemima confessed, still stroking Jon’s knuckles.

“He considers you a strong part of his life and that’s why he’d rather shield you from it. Think what you might but you’re fragile Jem, slightest things hurt you but that’s what has made you strong too. I just need you to remove the bubble you’ve wrapped around yourself and see things from his perspective. He might owe you an apology for keeping this from you but so do you,” Jay advised, squeezing Jemima’s shoulders reassuringly before exiting the ward.

Jemima was left to watch his retreating figure as she pondered on what he just said. A fresh burst of tears rolled down her cheeks, causing her to bury her head in her hands. Her shoulders shook violently as she sobbed uncontrollably.

“Jem?” Alan called out to her a few minutes later, causing her to raise her head. She immediately stood up and rushed towards him, engulfing him in a tight embrace as tears streamed down her cheeks. They stayed like that in each other’s embrace, neither of them saying anything as emotions gripped them.

“I am so sorry Jem,” Alan muttered, pulling her out of the embrace. Jemima shook her head, wiping off the rest of the tears from her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt.

“No Alan, I’m sorry. I should’ve been more considerate. You were right, I’m too self-absorbed and it’s my fault Jon is in this condition. I don’t think I’d ever forgive myself if anything happens to him Alan,” Jemima whispered in between tears, her sobs becoming heavy as she spoke.

“None of this is your fault,” Alan reassured stroking her hair soothingly.