Chapter Fourty

Chapter 40

"Jem?" Alan whispered out her name while they were still locked in an embrace.

"Yes, Alan," Jemima replied softly with her eyes closed as she enjoyed the cinnamon-musky scent that emitted from his. Her head was placed against his chest as she listened to the rhythmic thud of his heartbeat.

"I love you," Alan whispered, eliciting a soft smile from Jemima.
"I know Alan and I love you too," Jemima answered, still not lifting her head from Alan's chest.

"No Jem!" Alan groaned out softly, causing Jemima to finally lift her head from his chest as she cast him a quizzical glance.

"What is it?" Jemima questioned with a raised eyebrow as she stared at Alan, curiosity etching the corners of her face.

"I love you Jem! More than you think! Not just on the surface kind of love. My love for you runs deeper than you think," Alan confessed, causing Jemima to gasp. She gently pulled away from his grasp as she watched him intently.

"You can't do this to me, Alan!" Jemima pleaded, falling to the chair beside her as she raked her fingers through her hair.

"You can't do this to me! No! You can't, Alan! You just can't!" Jemima reiterated in a whisper, tears brimming from the corners of her eyes. Her gaze fluttered towards Jon for a moment and she observed the steady rise and fall of his chest, indicating that he was breathing fine.

"Do what Jem?" Alan queried as he bent down to her eye level and took her hands in his. He rubbed her knuckles in small circles.

"I just got over you, Alan!" Jemima confessed, causing Alan's eyes to widen in shock at her confession.

"What!" Alan exclaimed, disbelief gripping his insides as he stared at her. Jemima sniffed, standing up from her chair as she strode over to the window of the hospital that overlooked the garage. She observed a car reversed before driving out of the garage, leaving a trail of dust and smoke in its wake.

"Yes, Alan! I have always loved you but you saw me as nothing more than a younger sister. You never noticed. I had to come to terms with the fact that you'd never see me as something more and I had to get over you. Now that I have just finally, finally gotten over you, now that I can't feel the hurt anymore, you come and tell me you love me? That's not fair!" Jemima bawled, wiping her nose with her sleeve.

"But it doesn't change anything!" Alan tried to reason with her, causing Jemima to whip her head and look towards him.

"It does Alan! It changes everything!" Jemima mentioned, placing her hand against her head as she glanced up at the ceiling. She had never cried this much in such a long time and she was starting to develop a migraine.

"It's not as complicated as you think it is Jem. You just don't have to overthink it. All that matters is we love each other," Alan insisted, taking deliberate steps towards Jemima. Jemima glanced up at him, emotions swirling within her as she got lost in his deep blue eyes.

"It's complicated, Alan!" Jemima protested, looking away from him. Alan reached for her chin, directing her gaze back to him with the tip of his fingers.

"Then simplify it for me Jem," Alan pleaded, not trying to hide the emotions that had welled up inside him as his eyes shone with tears.

"I... it's not that simple!" Jemima exclaimed, pulling away from his grasp.

"Why not! I don't see how this is so difficult except you're in love with someone else," Alan commented, causing Jemima to shut her eyes momentarily as she pursed her lips. Alan's eyes widened in bewilderment at the realization that she might be in love with someone else.

"You are in love with someone else?" Alan asked with a hoarse voice as he stared at Jemima, seeking clarity but hoping that she wouldn't confirm it.

"I don't know what I feel Alan but I do know that I would kill for you, I would die for you, I'd move the earth just for you..." Jemima's words trailed off as hesitation lingered on the rest of her words.

"But you just don't love me enough to be with me though," Alan muttered, finishing the unsaid words for Jemima. Jemima pursed her lips and stared at her feet, afraid of meeting Alan's gaze.

Without saying another word, Alan walked out of the ward, leaving Jemima to ponder on her words. Jemima collapsed into the chair and closed her eyes as she combed through her hair with her fingers. Her gaze fluttered to Jon and she wished he would wake up to provide solace to her.

"What would you do Jon?" Jemima queried, glancing at the steady rise and fall of his chest. Her mind reeled with so many thoughts as she watched him intently. The incessant beeping of the monitor he was attached to and the ticking of the clock became distinct as it served as a cacophony of sounds disrupting her train of thought.

"Hi, Jem!" Jay called out to her, causing her to lift her head to glance at him.

"You're still here? I thought you had already left," Jemima commented, standing up to acknowledge him as she tucked her hands into both sides of her pockets. Jay observed her appearance and couldn't help but acknowledge the fact that she was extremely beautiful despite her disheveled hair and flushed face.

"It's getting late, we should go home," Jay suggested but Jemima nodded her head in defiance.

"You go on without me, I need to stay here to make sure Jon is fine. Alan needs the rest more than I do, you take him with you," Jemima stated, providing so many options for Jay but he refused with a negative shake of his head.

Just then, Alan strode into the ward, holding a bottle of water in his hand. His gaze momentarily locked with Jemima but she hastily looked away in an attempt to avoid any awkward altercation that might ensue.

"What's going on?" Alan asked skeptically, eyeing Jay with curiosity.

"Nothing. Jem thinks you should go home and get some rest while she stays behind," Jay answered, sharing a knowing glance with Alan. Jemima tried to decipher the look they shared but shrugged it off as nothing.

"He's right Jem, you have to go and rest. I think I need to as well. We could all go home, freshen up, and get enough sleep. Tomorrow we return," Alan suggested, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to stifle a yawn.

"But...”

“Don’t be stubborn Jem. Let’s just go,” Alan demanded, grabbing his satchel that lay in the corner of the room before exiting the ward. Jemima sighed wearily, casting a skeptical look at Jon before finally exiting the ward with Jay following suit.

They all proceeded to the car with Jem driving. The drive home was silent, each of them engulfed in their thought, wondering what the future could hold for either of them.

A few minutes later, they arrived at the house. Jay and Alan immediately alighted from the car and headed towards the house, leaving Jemima to ponder. She felt disturbed by something but could not place her finger on what it was exactly that bothered her.

She placed her head gently on the steering wheel and exhaled deeply, shrugging off whatever foreboding she was feeling. With resignation, she alighted from the vehicle as well and trotted into the house.

Not wanting to interact with anybody she walked straight to her room, closing the door behind her. Peeling off her clothes, she daintily stepped into the shower, allowing the cold water from the shower to cascade down her body as she wished she could wash off her intrusive thoughts the way she could wash off dirt from her body.

As the night wore on, Jemima desperately wished for sleep to consume her. She wondered how she could be so tired and sleepy yet sleep eluded her.

She eventually closed her eyes momentarily and when she opened them again, it was dawn. Jemima groaned in exasperation as she got up from the bed, dragging her feet across the floor as she made her way into the kitchen. She brewed a cup of coffee, waiting for it in silence. The clock ticking in the distance became distinct and the birds chirped away happily in the distance.

The telephone in the house rang, piercing the tranquility of the early morning. Startled momentarily, Jemima rushed to answer the phone but before she could get to it, the person hung up.

A few moments later, Alan joined Jemima in the kitchen where she was brewing her coffee.

“Couldn’t sleep again,” Alan stated more than he asked, eliciting a nod of confirmation from her. She passed him a cup of coffee which he took gladly.

“Alan, about yesterday…” Jemima began but the shrill ring of the telephone interrupted her, eliciting a deep sigh from within her.

“I’ll get that,” Jemima announced, going over to answer the phone.
Jemima picked up the phone, her eyes widening in shock as the person on the other end delivered the message.
Shocked, Jemima let go of the phone, causing it to crash against the floor.

“What’s wrong?” Alan asked, worry lacing the etches of his brows as he stared at her. He walked up to her and placed a hand on her shoulders but Jemima ignored him, crumpling to the ground.

“Talk to me!” Alan urged, his impatience growing with each passing second.

“Jon is missing.”