23 : History lesson

***~ She's a thunderstorm wrapped in beautiful flesh, looking to be felt and understood in a world that loves sunny days.***

**Evelyn :**

As I entered the bedroom, I began to shiver, not knowing what to expect from the Phoenix himself. Sure, he said he would never hurt me and I felt safe around him but that didn't stop me from feeling the fear that was already spreading throughout my body.

A door closed behind me and I realized that he was already behind me.

"Sit down," Raphael spoke softly, and without even wanting to, my legs obeyed immediately, so I went to the edge of the bed and immediately sat down, looking at him, seeing himself leaning against the door, with his arms crossed over his chest.

His gaze was already burning me, I lowered my head down, grabbing the hem of my blouse. A habit when I was nervous.

There was a moment of silence.

"Tell me everything, Evelyn," I swallowed hard after finally hearing his serious tone.

"There's nothing to tell..." I tried to argue because there really wasn't anything to tell. The man suddenly growled like an animal making me flinch.

"Don't make me repeat myself again. Tell me, *please*," to get a reaction and words out of me, I was amazed that he even had enough respect for me to use his manners.

I had to take a deep breath.

"I was alone all the time, watching movies and just sitting with my laptop, in this very bed, when I heard a noise. Thinking that someone had broken into the house, I took the decorative bottle, to protect myself. I went to the side where the sounds were coming from. I got to the kitchen and saw there's your brother. He was completely drunk and made food for himself. He told me that he came to visit you and thought that there was no one, so he decided to wait and make something in the meantime. Nothing really happened, I already said, " I explained somewhat clearly, in short, so he can understand me. Raphael only got angrier, I even saw his jaw muscle clench while he continued to watch me.

What bothered him all this time with his brother?

Was it about what Luke told him? They couldn't save someone before? At least I understood something like that from what he said but I wasn't so sure about such questions, I don't think I would find answers which he will bring me with a positive reaction to tell me everything what really happened.

*But didn't he say you were the queen? Wouldn't that be reason enough to have the right to know about your king and his past?*

No. Anyway, I wasn't ready for that yet.

"What are you thinking about now?" snapping out of my thoughts, I watched with wide eyes as the dark man stood up straight and came towards me. Before I could understand what was on his mind, Raphael had already sat down next to me and in one moment, when I was sitting alone, then in the next, I was lifted by the waist and put on his lap, like a child - princess style, with my legs across his knees.

"What are you doing??" almost choking from shock, I felt his grip around me, holding me so close that it was impossible for anyone to come between us.

Having taken off his cloak, already a while ago, he was now wearing only a black T-shirt and black pants. His hair was blown in all directions but that look suited him even better. Simple and casual, as if he was an ordinary person, in the world of mortals.

Then I realized that our faces were only a few centimeters apart, his eyes already on my face.

"Uhhh," my mind was jinxed and I felt that my cheeks were already burning as if I had eaten a spicy chili pepper that would make my whole mouth burn from how hot I felt.

Much closer, I even saw small lights dancing on his skin. As if in a trance, my hand went to his face and I touched it gently with my fingertips. I didn't even notice that Raphael suddenly tensed up under me, remaining completely still.

When I touched it, I felt little sparks that felt very hot on my fingers but it wasn't that I was amazed by that but that my touch didn't hurt him. I had taken off my gloves that protected me from killing others by accident, I could finally feel what it was like to touch someone. The physical contact of a person or any being felt so foreign and unfamiliar to me, that I couldn't remember the last time I even hugged someone, skin to skin. I felt normal for once.

The feeling was incredible.

"Baby…" a low whisper snapped me out of my state as I pulled away from him, nearly falling to the ground if it wasn't for his arms holding me.

When I discovered what I had done, my cheeks were redder and I wanted to crawl into the hole, never to be found again. Why would I be doing something so shameless?

What will he think of me now?

*You are a monster,* an inner voice whispered.

But if not?

No one would look at me like that if I were some horrible brainless freak who was a threat to all of humanity. His eyes and expression said otherwise.

Concern, worry, lust, and even a little bit of love. Maybe there were more feelings but I tried not to see them. I didn't want to. I was afraid of all this if I start to believe it for real.
We've only known each other for about a week and a half, it meant nothing.

Even if it was true that we had been together in some past life, now everything was different. New era, new times, and new feelings. They had to be earned in time.

A firm hand rested on my back, resting on the nape of my neck. Threading his fingers through my hair, gripping my neck from the back, his thumb on my chin, he lifted my head up. His eyes were on fire.

"Evelyn, when you think too much, both good and bad things in that pretty head of yours, your eyes go lifeless. They go dark and then you don't feel anything around you. It's like your soul is leaving your body. I don't like it, little one. I don't like it at all," pursing his lips in anger, I barely understood what he said when I finally came back.

"I'm sorry," my reply was robotic until I felt the heat on my forehead.

Eyes widening, I watched as Raphael's hot lips left my skin, watching my reaction. Realizing that he kissed me on the forehead made me feel all kinds of weird explosions in my stomach.

I felt butterflies.

Blushing again, I looked down because it was quite embarrassing. He was too handsome and gorgeous to look into those eyes forever. You could drown in them if you look much longer.

"See, that's better. Good girl," he muttered quietly to himself, his hand gently caressing my hair. I immediately closed my eyes.

So wonderful.

I even wanted to fall asleep there in his arms but I knew I couldn't. I should have been stronger.

"How is that possible?" I don't even remember asking myself that when I looked at him again. The eyebrows were furrowed in a confused expression.

"What exactly?''

"All of this. Us, our past, our bond, and what's happening to me. Who I really am. Do people even realize that they don't live in a normal world but one where there is magic? Everything is different because of what we've been taught for centuries, no one realizes it at all," trying to understand myself, Raphael just shook his head in a dismissive gesture, smiling slightly.

"That's where you're wrong, my little angel. Just millions of years ago, humans were created with powers that are beyond comprehension. You know why it's now forgotten in the mortal world?"

Making sure I was listening and shaking my head, waiting for what he had to say, Raphael continued.

" They punished us. The higher forces because there are even more powerful beings than me, who sit there and watch everything. How we live, how we sin, and whether we live, do things right or wrong. It all already began in ancient times but people remained so selfish and full of themselves that they destroyed them all. Most of them were simply deprived of their abilities, and in the worst case - they committed suicide, " looking somewhere far far away with a serious grimace, as if remembering the past, I saw him telling me the truth. There was disappointment, sorrow, and anger in that look. All in one.

"Because they felt powerless?" my whisper was deathly quiet and broken.

Phoenix shook his head again, "No, they were more afraid of not achieving what they set out to do. Once the powers were taken away, they had nothing. They had forgotten the very most important point."

"What?" wide-eyed, I didn't notice that I had grabbed his shirt, impatiently waiting for the truth. I was afraid that if I breathed in, all the information would evaporate into the air.

His eyes lit up until they met mine.

"To see the good in all the bad. To forgive and love what they already have, instead of wasting it for selfish and hypocritical purposes. It took so many sacrifices that until now, the memory has deteriorated over time, and like in a new page, you have stepped into a new story, unaware of your true talent and what you were created for from the beginning of this world. Only pure souls were left untouched, you are one of them," caressing my cheek, I must have looked like a shocked goldfish, with my mouth hanging open.

"Me?" I could hear the disbelief in my tone, "But what...I kill every living thing with my touch, it's not a talent that should be loved and appreciated," angry at myself and the whole world, why exactly this happens to me, I wonder why couldn't something benevolent to nature be given but to be happy about abilities that you can kill someone with, it was not something that should be respected. It made me feel terrible.

"No, darling, it's not like that at all," disagreeing about what I said, his fingers lifted my chin to look at him, "If you see the good in it and believe in yourself, your abilities will be the best thing that ever happened to you. That's part of you, my dear. You have to accept them and love them with you because without them, you are not yourself. When you believe it, you will see what will happen, and when that day comes, I will be there to see it. I will be the first one to be proud of who you really are," smiling a wide loving smile, I was speechless.

Feeling the wetness in the corners of my eyes, I had to swallow hard to keep from crying in front of him. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me. It made me believe that maybe I still had time. Maybe I really need to believe in myself because good things can come with it.

If it is easy to take away, then it is easy to give it back.