30 : Comfort and Feelings

**Evelyn :**

"So..." trailing off, I bit my lip and looked at Raphael who had already recovered and cleaned up, now all the wounds he had were completely gone, as if he had never been hurt. Now we were in his office room and he was concentrating on the computer screen while I was sitting on a small sofa eating sweet strawberry cupcakes.

When I was worried and nervous, I had a habit of eating sweets, I don't even know why.

Hearing my voice, he raised his head, "Yes, Evelyn?”

I had to sigh as I looked away as his beautiful blazing eyes distracted me. I took a bite while I think of my answer carefully, "So you didn't tell me what happened to you when you were gone. Is my killer still alive?”

There was a moment of silence from the start, only our breathing and the ticking of the clock that was mounted on the wall behind him was heard.

“Evelyn.”

One word and I already understood. If I didn't keep an eye contact with him, he wouldn't tell me anything so I lifted my head up and bravely looked at his face, which was already full of seriousness. Appreciating my attention, he let out a sharp sigh and ran one hand through his hair.

"Since I don't want to lie to you, I'll be honest with you, okay?" Nodding, he continued, "I found his hiding spot when I was patrolling the other night but I wasn't really sure if it was the right location. I sent some of my friends who unfortunately didn't make it through," pursing his lips into a straight line, I noticed anger rising in him.

"Then I realized that this was no ordinary mortal who had thought of stalking someone of whom the other had no idea at all. He knew both about your abilities and about me, who I am to you and I also found that he had connections with someone who had found a way to weaken me if I ever got to him. That explosion? It was just a warning and when one of my friends sent me his coordinates before he died by his hand, I was ready to go after him ."

"Last night I also got there but he was much smarter and took smarter steps before me. That's why I was injected with some kind of substance that makes me bleed longer, and my inner bird could not be awakened for a moment. It seemed that I've lost him for a moment..." Now he turned away, his gaze went somewhere far away, as if for a moment he was pained by those memories and feelings he endured in that moment.

My heart broke for him at that moment because I wasn't there to help. We were partners after all.

Leaving the half-eaten cupcake that had been in my hands for quite some time, I stood up and crossed the extra distance to go around the desk and stand next to him. Just noticing me now, Raphael turned his chair towards me. Whatever he saw on my face, he was satisfied and smiled softly as he put his hands on my hips to lift me onto his lap. I immediately wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder, comforting my bird with silence.

It seemed that instead of an answer I heard him purring, like a cat that got a mouse after a long hunt. Holding me close, he gently started stroking my hair.

"You can't sit still, don’t you, Evelyn? You need my attention," he teased me and I just closed my eyes, and pressed myself so close to him that there was no space between us.

"No, I thought you needed it yourself," I whispered as I felt him tense beneath me like a statue.

"And why?" His voice was much lower now.

"Because..." I leaned away from him and placed my hand on his heart, looking down at his chest as I considered my words.

"Because you've been alone all this time, without me, and always on your own. It's about time someone take care of you too, even though I know you can do it yourself. I know you don't need help but you know I care and it hurts me too if you're hurting. I think I love you, although it's crazy, knowing what's happened lately. It's really fast, of course, and I don't know if - "

After silencing me with his palm, my eyes shot up to look at him with an inner panic because I've said too much and now I'm in trouble but there was an emotion in his gaze that hadn't been there before. Or I was too ignorant to understand them.

He had a small smile on his face but it quickly disappeared as he removed his hand from me and brought our foreheads together, ”Say that one more time," he commanded and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"What exactly?" my voice was small and delicate, afraid of his reaction.

“Evelyn.”

I swallowed hard, my cheeks flushing, "I love you?"

One eyebrow went up and it looked like he wanted to laugh at me. If so, then he’s in real trouble. Handsome jerk.

"Is that a question?"

Shaking my head, I was redder than a strawberry.

"So tell me what I want to hear, Evelyn.”

"I love you, Raphael.” More courageously, I wanted to pat myself on the shoulder to reward myself for that, how surprisingly calm I sounded.

Now he smiled wider, looking at my eyes, lips and eyes again. Grabbing my neck from behind, he gently brushed his lips against mine.

"I love you too, Evelyn. More than you can imagine," he mumbled and I barely suppressed my shock at the knowledge that he felt the same and was taking it better than I was.

After giving me the kiss I was waiting for, I inhaled heavily his strong cologne and the smell of coffee coming from his mouth as evidence that he had been drinking it as I noticed a cup on his desk next to his laptop.

As we leaned away from each other, giving each other the distance we needed, Raphael’s skin glowed with a rush of emotion.

I snickered at the sight.

"What?"

I had to stop myself from giggling, “You look like Edward Cullen from Twilight - all sparkly and shiny - , " biting my lip to keep myself from laughing, Phoenix just tilted his head to the side, with a questioning look.

"Who is Edward Cullen?"

"What??? You don't know the movie Twilight?" I was shocked.

He just shook his head in denial while I continued to stare at him in confusion as if he were an alien from another world.

“Wait, how old were you again?" As I asked this, I started to think that I don't know it at all because if he is immortal, then it turns out that he has already been on Earth for a long time.

Raphael’s lips twitched into a smile, ”I haven't told you how old I am, at least not until now. You knew in your previous life because there were no secrets between us," he explained. I looked deep into his eyes, trying to get the answer out.

"You are billions of years old."

Death laughed at me as he threw his head back and I felt all the vibrations of his body go through me.

“You’re cute but no, I'm younger. The youngest ruler since the last one because when one's time is up, the next one comes. I'm only four hundred thousand years old."

My eyes probably bulged out of my sockets when I tried to get out of his grip when his answer passed those pretty lips.

"Oh my god! You're so old! Oh my god, so you're an old grandpa? I'm with an old grandpa?” Yelling and flailing dramatically, Raphael grabbed my hands and put them behind my back.

Realizing I wasn't going to get anywhere, I stopped and breathed heavily as I watched Raphael smile but this time it was an evil smile.

*Oh no.*

“Call me an old grandpa one more time, you'll be punished, do you want to be spanked which I've promised every time but still haven't given?” he threatened me and I was too stupid and started screaming again.

"OH GOD HELP! I'M GOING TO BE KILLED BY AN OLD MAN! JESUS, SWEET MOTHER OF GOD, I-"

One moment I was on his lap, facing him, and the next, on my stomach, across his legs. When I came to understanding what is happening, I tried to kick to get free but he was stronger and held me in place.

"Alright, that's enough. Even though you're my queen, I'll spank you if it's necessary. It's necessary now, so stay still and listen to me," the words were cold, with a promise to punish me.

"No, no, no, please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. It was just a joke, please - OW! OUCH!"

The quiet atmosphere of the room was broken by a loud slap on the left side of my bottom. After tearing off my pants, I felt it all over my body.

We both froze.

Shock and adrenaline hit me full force when I realized what had happened.

*Did he just spank my bottom? Taking off my pants, on bare flesh?*

I started kicking again because I didn't want it to continue. No one has ever hit me to punish me in my life. I knew it wasn't meant to hurt me with real pain but my brain couldn't process it.

"YOU'RE CRAZY! STOP, PLEASE! LET ME GO!!!"

This continued with dozens more hits on each side of my bottom, after each one he gently massaged it until he started again. Feeling my ass sting from his hand, my cheeks were wet and my tears were falling like raindrops from my eyes.

In the end, I felt him leaning close to my ear,” Will you be a good girl and listen to me without calling me bad names or will we continue this punishment of yours?”

I sobbed and began to hiccup from crying but could only nod as I relaxed under his hold and accepted my fate.

“See? That's so much better," leaning back, he caressed my skin a few more times, examining his work for a moment.

"Such a pretty pink color. Hopefully that'll be a lesson," lifting me up, I didn't even pull my pants back up to curl back into him, trying to get the comfort that only he can give me. Even though my backside was burning from his hand and I knew I would feel it until the next day, at least it was a reminder that I was here with him.

Raphael stroked my hair in a gentle gesture and kissed my head, "It's okay, sweetheart. You know you needed it."

I couldn't disagree. In a way, it gave me more strength and awareness that Phoenix is my one and only. Only he could discipline me and then comfort me.

The realization made me sleepy and I yawned.

“Feeling sleepy, my little brat?” I felt him smile.

My answer was only a hum and I don't remember what he said to me next because I closed my eyes, surrendering myself completely to his warmth.