Chapter Thirty-Four: Lexa

Chapter Thirty-Four
~ Lexa ~
I immediately felt guilty as S ran out of the room, but I was mad. She could have gotten herself hurt. It would not have been hard to tell one of us she could fix it. She’s the one who just a single night before had lectured me on needing to work as a team. Whatever this was, it was not my fault.
“Now you’ve done it,” Grey snapped as he exited the room, but I didn’t move. I was still fuming.
“Breathe, Lex,” Will whispered in my ear.
I shot him a deadly glare. How dare he tell me to breathe? She could have endangered everyone.
“How is this different?” Will prodded.
He knew he was in dangerous territory with that question, I could tell by his face, but what he meant, I had no idea.
“What?” I snapped. I could hear the anger in my voice.
“How is what she did any different than what you do every day?”
“That is not a fair question, William.” I replied coldly.
“Why not?” He questioned, his voice calm with just a smidge of an edge. “You make risky choices nearly every day. Don’t think I don’t know that you go beyond our sensors alone at least twice a day. Don’t think we don’t notice that you have this unspoken death wish. You came to save me in the prisons, Lex. We agreed on no extraordinary measures to save each other yet you turned yourself in. You sent me away.”
“I had to!” I interjected. “You would have-”
But he interrupted my interjection. “I would have done something stupid? Like try to save you?” I froze at his remark. “We have the right to try and save you Lex.”
“No.” I bit out. “No, you have no right to any bit of me. There is nothing worth saving. I didn’t need saving. You’re the one who needed saving. Not me. I broke myself out. And I sure as hell don’t now. I can’t believe you’re siding with her. I can’t believe I slept with you.” I moved to walk out.
“If you walk away,” He called after me, “You’re proving that you can’t handle this. And I don’t think that’s your intention.”
He was so calm. His voice was loud but even. And it made me even more mad. We had a job to do. People’s lives were on the line. There were no feelings that could be involved. And mine were shut down. I couldn’t feel a damn thing as I made my way to the training center. I had classes to teach. I had things to run. I had to do my part. Because this was my responsibility. It wasn’t Will’s. It wasn’t Grey’s. It wasn’t Jax’s. And it definitely wasn’t S’s. It was mine. It was my mother who had died for this. She had left this to me and only me. Trust no one. But 8 year old me had made that mistake. She had trusted these people. She had written S every single year begging for help, sneaking into the city and breaking into her house to leave a note on her bed. And every year, she was disappointed by the lack of help from her once best friend.
A surge of panic rocketed its way through me, and I let out an unexpected gasp as Eddie, the person I was training with hit my glove.
I dropped my gloves immediately and ran out of the room. I was seeing colors in the energy again. Not good. Not good.
“Hey, have you seen Aspen?” Jax called out as soon as he saw me.
But all I could do was wave him off. I could barely see. It was all bright. Like a bright bright red and the waves were blinding. And on top of that there was now a hum. As if I could hear the waves. And they were calling me somewhere.
I walked blindly, not sure where I was headed. I was just trying to follow the waves. I didn’t even know I was headed outside till I felt the harsh cold pull me out of the colors.
“What the hell,” I whispered aloud as I saw a hole in our illusion. Santana would need to fix that immediately. But before I could move, I noticed there were voices on the other sides. I couldn’t peek out for fear of being seen, but I crouched and listened, realizing that it was a group of city people looking for the sick. And they knew the building should be here. They were assuming they were lost. Somehow, they had made a mistake. I mean the woods were complicated and the trail had been lost over years of lack of use. They might have been lost, but sooner or later they would realize they weren’t lost, and we were hidden just under their noses.

“Get back.” Grey hissed behind me.
His voice made me jump, and I had to bite my tongue to not make a sound.
I moved back from the hole slowly as if not to make a sound.
“Inside, now.” Grey growled.
“I don’t take orders from you, Grey.” I responded angrily.
“Go inside.”
He looked livid as hell and was standing at his full height, as if he was trying to look big. And a huge part of me wanted to run through that hole and never be seen again. But that wasn’t an option. I had my people to protect.
“I don’t take orders from you,” I poked his chest with my finger before turning to go inside. “Team meeting. Now.”
He followed me slowly, but I could feel his rage just following off him.
“What’s wrong?” Jax asked as we approached. I could tell our energy was vibrating the place. “Did you find Aspen?”
“Office, now.” I commanded.
My tone left no room for argument.
The last person I needed was Will, and of course he was nowhere to be found.
After 5 minutes of searching, I asked someone.
“Where the hell is Will?” I asked the first person I saw who I thought would know.
They paused, and I could feel their nervousness that came with the question.
“He’s in his room with Isabella.” They said finally.
I felt my stomach drop. Isabella was one of the few people near our age around here and a promising warrior.
“Okay.” I replied.
And instead of going to meet the boys in the office, I went to my room and grabbed my backpack. It was all too much. I was seeing colors again. This time a vibrant royal blue and it was leading me the hell out of this place. And without a second thought about the choices I was making, I walked away from the only thing I had known for the last 10 years of my life. Where I was going, I had no idea, but I was following the colors to find out. And everyone else could just suck it. They were not my responsibility any longer.