Chapter 21

James rushed into Portia's room when he heard the screams. He wasn't surprised to see that it wasn't something bad.

The little girl was running all over her room, behind her was Luna. It was the third time this had happened to him in a week. He should stop worrying so much, although it never hurt to be vigilant. Maybe someday the screams would be for real.

He left the room quickly, then, went to his room and sat on the bed.

He was planning a trip. Not a long one, but he wanted to take a trip. Two weeks had passed since his argument with Luna.

How did it go? Bad? Not necessarily. Their relationship had improved, though they each tried to keep it quiet. He tried to stay out of it and be professional, but sometimes he got caught up in some things that limited that rule.

He didn't want to treat her badly, but if he let her get close, it could be catastrophic, as he knew each other. He knew himself and knew how much he could get involved if they decided to be friends. Of course, the thing that kept him from getting carried away was Portia. What would happen if it ended badly in their relationship and affected the girl?

James remembered what he had experienced with his Sarah. She was a wonderful person. She had nice brown hair, big green eyes, long eyelashes, and delicate features. Her dream was very simple, but it was what she wanted most. To have a family, and to have her own art studio. She loved art, James had fulfilled it for her, but she could never see it.

He had prepared a complete studio for her. He would give it to her for her birthday, but two weeks before, she died. It was too hard for him to sell everything, but he couldn't bear to have it there, alone. Without the warmth she could gave it.

And Portia...the first few days were chaos. He couldn't take care of her, he was a wreck. Sentimentally bad, in inexplicable pain. But he had a daughter to take care of. And thanks to Rose's help, he was able to do it.

Month by month, he overcame everything. Not quite, but he did. Portia was growing up, and so was he. But that, after all, was in the past. All the pain had to go, for he wanted to remember her with love.

He looked at his phone on the nightstand next to his bed. He picked it up, and dialed the number he rarely dialed.

-Hi... Mom.

-Honey, how are you? You don't usually call me, has something happened? Is Portia okay? - the person on the line asked with concern.

-Yes, yes, she's fine. I just wanted to call you. How are you?

-Fine, you? - The tone in which she spoke somehow managed to reassure him.

-Well, I'm... I'm thinking about traveling, you know...

-A business trip?

-No, it's not that. I was thinking of taking Portia and Rose somewhere nice.

-Oh, how's the new nanny? Is she getting along with Portia?

James tensed up.

-Yeah, sure...

She interrupted him.

-That's good. It's good to take her on a trip then.

- Well, if she wants to....

-What do you mean, "if she wants to"? She her babysitter, don't you pay her for that?

-Yes, sure. - he answered trying to sound friendly.

He wasn't sure if Luna would want to go.

-Honey, can I help you with anything?

James sighed.

-No, why?

- Your voice sounds muffled, are you sure everything's okay?

James smiled. She knew him.

-Yeah, it's just... a lot of work, you know, every day a little bit. And it piles up.

-Talk to her.

-What?

-Honey, do you think I'm stupid? I know you very well, and I know how you get when you get tired from work. Now you're not tired from work.

James felt a great urge to tell his mother the whole truth.

But he couldn't.

-There's nothing to talk about, Mom. It's just, I feel like... I just feel kind of dazed about everything.

-Dazed? What does that mean?

-Nothing, I think I'll figure this out soon. How's everything over there?

-Everything is fine, James. - she replied. James knew she was smiling.

-Well, I'll call you tomorrow, okay?

-Mmm, I'll take your word for it. Okay, sweetie. Bye, take care.

-You too, bye.

She said goodbye and hung up.

His mother wanted explanations, it was obvious. He shouldn't have told her anything, but she knew him so well, she could tell anything just by listening to him talk. He knew she feared he would fall back into that dark pit Sarah was leading him to.

He preferred to leave the subject up in the air and went down to the kitchen. Everyone was there, except his daughter.

- Good morning - he greeted, then walked straight to the refrigerator.

-She's asleep. - Luna answered. He nodded slightly.

- Honey, this came for you today. -Rose said, handing over some papers. He looked at them sideways.

-Oh, right.

He took the papers and dropped them in her lap. He completely ignored Luna for the rest of the time. After that, he went straight to his office. He had a lot of organizing to do, as his cousin's wedding was in a week.