Chapter 17

Gina


“Come on, hurry up, guys; otherwise we are going to be late.” I rushed my two brothers. We meant to leave twenty minutes ago, but they took ages to get ready. They were always so disorganised. We were going to hit traffic, and later on, they would complain that they missed the beginning of the fight. Josh had finally managed to get a day off, and Patrick had been nagging me about this boxing match since Harry got him the tickets.
“VIP seats? Can you believe it? Harry said that there might be other famous people there,” Patrick said, excited, jumping around when we were walking to the car.
“I have no idea. It’s the middle of the week. Don’t be disappointed when David Beckham doesn’t show up.” I chuckled.
“So, you guys are dating then?” Josh asked for the fifth time today when Patrick got to the car.
“That is none of your business. Get in; otherwise you will miss the fight,” I told him, shaking my head.
I really had no idea what was happening. Since our meeting with Adler, Harry had been texting and calling. This wasn’t something I’d asked for, but I liked that he was making an effort.
We’d been hanging out more often, too, well, mainly having sex and eating in fancy restaurants. It wasn’t easy with my schedule, but I was done with doing extra hours at work. There was no point thinking about the logistics. This was just a fling, and I didn’t want us to start something serious.
I was extremely grateful that Harry had managed to get me a meeting with Adler. It was an opportunity of a lifetime. I received all the paperwork from his office, and he was already making plans to see all the girls in action. There was still a lot of planning and preparation, but I was glad that things were moving along.
I was a little nervous when I drove. The boys were bickering with each other in the back. Nina had refused to leave her room. Apparently, she and Robert had a fight and she was heartbroken.
The traffic was atrocious and, by the time we arrived at the club, the fight had already started. Benny, the bouncer, took our tickets. Inside, someone else showed us to our seats. Josh was saying that we were already being treated like celebrities. Harry was in the ring and, when I saw him, my heart did an unsteady flip. He looked good, and my body raged with heat, shooting down my arms and legs,
Harry had managed to get us very good seats, so we were situated right in front of the ring. We were sitting amongst a few men with elegant- and expensive-looking suits. Their trophy wives or girlfriends were glancing around, looking bored. I didn’t even know that I liked boxing. Josh started this tradition, and ever since we could remember, we’d gone to see matches together.
“Sweet, look at this view,” Josh shouted, excited.
The crowd was going wild already, with people shouting and cheering when Mr. H started throwing punches at his opponent. I couldn’t stop staring at his fit body, thinking that only a few nights ago, I’d had him all to myself. The fight went on for a while, at least three rounds. A few times I got a bit nervous, because I thought the other guy was kicking Harry’s arse. His opponent was larger, and he was fast, too. Sweat dripped down Harry’s muscular body, but he looked focused, so I calmed down a little.
I cheered him on along with the boys. The entire time, my heart raced away. Harry got hit a few times. I saw blood pouring down his brow, but he kept moving around the ring. The boys were screaming, and I thought by the end of this match, I was going to be deaf. As it turned out, the last round was the most exciting.
Harry looked exhausted, losing his balance, and I had to shut my eyes when the other guy started throwing quick punches at him.
Then moments later the crowd erupted, and when I looked, the other boxer was knocked down. It only took a couple of seconds. The scores were showing that Harry had won. People at the ring started calling his name, and heat flowed through me.
He looked around and finally noticed us in the front row. Our eyes met and my breath caught when he smiled. For a split second, I thought we were alone, staring at each other, that there was no crowd, no people. That this was a different kind of smile. Harry’s face instantly brightened up when he found me in the crowd. A large lump formed in my throat, and I began to wonder if maybe this whole thing was moving too fast.
I was still reluctant to commit, because the truth was, I didn’t know much about him. On top of that, he was involved with Crystal. We were spending so much time together now, that maybe this relationship stopped being casual when he surprised me with dinner at Principality Stadium.
The boys wanted to see Harry to congratulate him personally. I had promised him I’d be there, but I was hesitant to see him again. Several minutes later, Josh and Patrick were leading me toward the same white corridor where I’d seen him for the first time with Crystal.
This didn’t feel right. Everything was happening too fast. We stopped outside the door and I panicked. The past had taught me that I couldn’t get attached to him, because then I would lose my focus. All the signals were clear. We had a good time, but I didn’t want to be involved with a man who was fucking someone else’s wife. This was just too much.
“What’s wrong, Gina? Don’t you want to say hello?” Joshua asked when I didn’t move.
“No, guys, you go on in. I’ll wait in the car,” I said, feeling sick all of a sudden. I’d made a mistake; I shouldn’t have continued sleeping with him. That day at the stadium was great, but we weren’t a couple.
“Are you crazy? I bet he will want to see you. What am I supposed to say to him?” Josh asked, looking like he was ready to drag me inside that room no matter what. He didn’t get what was happening. Blood was rushing to my ears, and I felt nauseous. There was no point pretending that there was something between us.
“Just tell him I had to make a phone call or something,” I told them, then turned around and walked in the opposite direction. I’d let myself become dependent on a man and that was never supposed to happen. It was time to take a step back. Harry could have me, but only as his campaign manager.
He would never have my heart.

Harry

I flexed my shoulders and stretched my legs. I was still pumped after the fight and my muscles were burning. Maybe Natasha could squeeze me in for a massage tomorrow morning. I couldn’t feel my jaw, and I knew that in the morning I was going to ache all over. The match went better than I expected, and the main thing was that Gina showed up. We both felt something during that short moment when I was in the ring and our eyes locked. She lifted my spirits and I won that fight for her. It was a bonus that she enjoyed boxing. Not many women did, so those little things in common were only pulling us closer. Beyond the attraction, we became two people who wanted to be together.
I knew now that I wasn’t interested in anyone else. Gina was special.
“That was a good fight, mate. I should have bet money on it,” my mate, Jake, said, who came back with me to the changing room to check if I was all right. When I started out, Jake became my trainer. Several years ago, he was a professional boxer, too, but then he got injured and decided to open a gym.
“That’s insulting, mate. I see you don’t have any faith in me,” I said, shaking my head. We started talking about my new training regimen when someone knocked on the door. I shouted to come in, and a moment later, Gina’s brothers strolled in. They both had wicked smiles on their faces, but Gina wasn’t with them, and my heart sank. I was looking forward to seeing her. Everything had been going great since that meeting with Adler McDougall.
“Hey, boys, what’s happening?”
These days I wanted to be around her all the time. After our intense sex in the VIP box, I started calling her and texting a few times a day. My shitty rules didn’t matter. She drove my nightmares away and we got on so well.
“The fight was awesome. Jamie Shaw was quick, but that move in the end, man. You’ll have to show me it sometime,” Josh said, looking all pumped up.
“Well, I was hoping to impress your sister. So, where is she? I thought she was with you guys.”
“She had to make a phone call or something, said she would meet us by the car,” Josh said, scratching his jaw nervously. I didn’t want them to feel awkward, so I didn’t ask any more questions.
We started talking about the match. Patrick was a huge fan of basketball, but he wanted to give boxing a try, so I gave him some names and places of where he could start. The young guy was eager and most likely determined like his sister. The boys insisted on waiting for me when I showered. I decided to give Gina some space, but I couldn’t help wanting her here.
I grabbed my stuff from the locker, and I bought the boys drinks from the vending machine. A few people congratulated me, and some girls invited me over to a party at their place. I politely declined, still thinking about a red-haired pole dancer who was supposed to be sitting next to me right now.
Josh kept telling me about his work. He worked at a garage, and he wanted to go back to University to study engineering in the future.
Then we went outside, and just by the entrance, Benny started flashing money in front of my face, saying I had made him a few hundred tonight.
Josh pointed out where Gina had parked. Something came over me then, and I wanted to be done with the bullshit. She obviously didn’t want to see me, and I needed to know what her problem was.
“All right, guys. I need to have a chat with your sister. It seems she is pissed about something,” I said. Patrick exchanged a worried look with his brother. There was something wrong, the boys knew it.
“Good luck,” Josh said.
I ran across the street, thinking that I must have screwed things up between us. Maybe she was still pissed off about Crystal.
Gina was staring intently at the screen of her phone when I walked toward her. Her hair, as usual, was in a huge mess, but she looked sexy as hell wearing tight black leggings.
“You’re avoiding me,” I said, standing right in front of her. Her brothers were watching us, so I had to behave.
“I sent the boys. They wanted to speak to you. I didn’t want to interfere,” she explained, looking away.
I sighed loudly, knowing I had screwed up. In the beginning, I’d said I didn’t sleep with the same woman twice, and here I was standing in front of her, trying to pretend that I wanted more than I could actually give her.
“Tell me, what’s going on? We had a good time. Did I do something wrong?”
You’re asking too many questions, you arsehole. Just be honest with her. I was new to this and had no idea how I was supposed to behave. All of a sudden, I was scared that she would walk away. My mouth was dry, and blood was pumping in my ears. Everything seemed easier before I got involved with her. One-night stands and then I moved on, but I wasn’t able to do that with Gina. We were too much alike.
“I had a great time, Harry, but that’s not the point. We were moving too fast. I felt a little suffocated earlier on,” she admitted, chewing her bottom lip.
This wasn’t something that I expected to hear. I was supposed to be the arsehole who couldn’t commit, not the other way around. Over the years I had proven to myself that I wasn’t ready to be with another human being, but maybe it was just fear. Maybe we both needed it to stay on the surface and not risk more.
“Listen to me, this isn’t what you think. I’m fucked up, and I’m incapable of feeling anything. We are having fun and that’s all. Whatever there is between us won’t turn into a sour romance. We like fucking each other. Nothing has to change here.”
Those words made me feel like crap, but she was the one who was scared. I couldn’t wait. I had to get a hold of that lawyer in order to deal with Crystal once and for all. She was complicating my life and Gina was distancing herself from me.
“My family is my priority. It has been like that since my parents died. Josh and Patrick think we are dating. I don’t want them getting attached to someone who will disappear. So, it’s better if we end this now.”
I sucked in a breath and dragged my hands through my hair. For a split second, I thought I was staring down at Louisa, but now the roles had turned. Now I knew how she felt when I rejected her.
“Nothing will change. Your brothers are intelligent lads and they will understand. I guess we’re both afraid of where this will go, but right now all I want is to bend you over and fuck you again. You don’t have to worry about my feelings. I’m incapable of loving another human being.”
“No, this isn’t possible. Everyone is capable of loving someone,” she said. I needed to keep talking. I never told anyone about my shitty past, but Gina was different.
“Maybe, hopefully there is still hope for me. For now, the sex—that’s the only thing that keeps me going. A couple of weeks ago something changed. I saw you in the crowd and I wanted you instantly,” I told her. “My ex-girlfriend told me that she loved me, and I threw that love back in her face. She nearly killed herself because of me. Trust me, it’s better that we don’t label anything.”
There it was. I said what I had to. Gina now knew about Louisa, so we were even. She wasn’t the only person who was afraid. The truth was, I could never commit, because the past always held me back.
“What happened?” she asked.
“Nothing. She told me that I could love her back, but I didn’t want to listen. The next day she took a bunch of pills and nearly died. Luckily her mother found her in time. She wrote me a letter afterward, telling me I didn’t deserve being pitied.”
“What do you want from me?” Gina asked. “You want to keep fucking me and other women? Is this how it’s going to be from now on?”
“No, no. It’s just you. I don’t need anyone else,” I assured her and brought her closer to my body. There were still a lot of things that we had to discuss, but right then, it didn’t matter.