Chapter 34: Flawed

< Shirley >
"Well, this is exactly how I imagined my date with you to look like," I let out once I sat down at a fancy table of the most expensive restaurant in our city.
"Your ideal date?" Dylan teased.
"No, the least to my liking." I flashed him a tight-lipped smile and looked outside the wall-sized window at the night city view. I was wearing a simple off-shoulder red gown while he was wearing a red shirt underneath his black blazer to match me.
I heard the chair next to our table being pulled out. I looked towards Dina and gave her a wave. She rolled her eyes in reply.
"So, what is your ideal date like?" Dylan asked, which was an obvious attempt to not get bored while waiting for our food since he couldn't even use his cell phone to pass time as it would show insincerity towards me.
I sighed and started, "Somewhere away from the prying eyes, somewhere just the two of us with nature being the witness of our love. Or a crowded place where no one would have the time to look at us while we have all the fun we want." I looked at his way and forced a smile, taunting, "Not someplace where I would have to sit at such a distance from him."
Dylan chortled and waited till the waiter finished pouring the wine into our glasses before speaking, "It was probably predestined that we aren't to have a perfect date."
"What is your perfect date like?" I asked him, taking a sip of the red wine.
Dylan played with his glass and replied, "I have no such fantasies."
"Liar."
He twitched his lips. "Well, my perfect date would be in the bedroom."
"Why am I not surprised?" I scoffed and drank my wine. "Ah, that reminds me. You said I was good in bed. Why did you say such an absurd thing?"
"Why, is it not true?" he mocked, and I narrowed my eyes at him. "Or are you a…" he trailed off, his eyes lowering down.
I covered my chest in defense. "Pervert," I mumbled. He chuckled and straightened up on his seat. "I have had a lot of relationships back in high school," I said.
"Do I need to know that?"
"You might. What if she asks you about it?" He shrugged as I continued, "How many girlfriends did you have in your high school?"
The smile on his lips dropped as his eyes lost the tiny spark they had. "I never attended high school." My heart wrenched at his remorseful voice. "However, I was homeschooled."
What were his circumstances to have been homeschooled? I couldn't help but wonder.
To lighten the mood again, I spoke up, "Since you were homeschooled, I suppose you are a…"
Dylan threw his head and started laughing. It was one of the most beautiful sights of him I had seen so far. Once he stopped laughing, he sipped from his glass and said, "I go to a lot of bars if that's what you are asking."
Soon after that, the waiter served our food.
"If you and I were to date for real, we would have to compromise a lot," I hypothesized as I picked up the knife and fork to cut the steak.
"Why is that?" He arched an eyebrow while already busy cutting his steak.
"You would have to start going out more often, and I would have to start staying in the bedroom more often." When I looked into his eyes, we both started laughing.
"Let's never date for real," he said and exchanged our plates, giving me the plate with the small pieces of steak which he cut for me. "It's to show Dina," he informed.
That's when I remembered that Dina was still here, watching us. I had forgotten all about her while talking to him. Come to think of it, it was probably all because of Dina that he was putting up a show.
We were almost done with our meal when Dina walked up to us. She had a genuine smile on her face, which was really showcasing her real beauty. "I wish you guys all the best for the future."
"Do you finally believe us?" Dylan let out, and Dina nodded.
Even though she was smiling, she was sad. I couldn't imagine how bad she must have felt by seeing me with Dylan all night. "Are you giving up on him already?" I blurted out. Dina was surprised at my question, and I could already feel Dylan glaring at me. "You said you loved him."
Dina took a sharp breath and said. "Yes, I do. It's because I love him, I wish for his happiness more than anything else, even if it shall break my heart." Her eyes started to fill with tears. "Even though he might like you only for your exterior features, you can make him smile like I never could, and I hope you continue to do so."
I was feeling really bad for her. She was giving up on her love for such a charade. He might have thought she was annoying because she was trying to win his attention, but her love did nothing wrong. She didn't deserve to be hurt like this by us.
"I will take my leave now. I will try not to see you again, Dylan. But be happy." Dina kissed his cheek for the last time and ran out of the restaurant, tears running down her cheeks uncontrollably.
After that, an awkward atmosphere prevailed for a while until Dylan spoke up in relief, "Finally, one annoying person out of my life."
I looked at him with disbelief. "Don't you feel bad for her?"
"Why should I?" Dylan said, having no trace of grimace on his face. It was fine that he didn't feel anything for Dina, but how could he not feel a speck of sadness of hurting her so bad intentionally?
"You just broke her heart. You made her cry," I retorted.
"I have done so plenty and in worse ways," he responded coldly.
"Still, it doesn't change the fact that you should feel bad for her," I said firmly.
He looked me in the eye and said, "Even if I start feeling bad for everyone, would they do the same for me?"
I became speechless as I was overwhelmed by the emotions that reflected in his eyes within a few seconds. There was a fire for vengeance and a demand for justice. He looked so abandoned, alone, wronged, and so very lost.
"A person who has lived her life sheltered by her dad would never know why I am so indifferent to other people's pain," he spat out spitefully. "When I was in need of help, people looked away as if they couldn't even see me. I'm just paying for what they did to me, so don't you dare look at me with those accusing eyes of yours for being the person I am today. I didn't ask for this, either."
I pressed the bridge of my nose and took a deep breath before saying, "Dylan, I'm sorry. I understand that—"
"An ignorant, overconfident, whiny, persistent, inconsiderate, prideful person would never understand me." With each word he uttered against me hit like a truck, it was as if he was stabbing me. "And don't show me your half-assed sympathy. I don't need it."
I swallowed and looked up in order not to let my tears slip past my eyes.
"I know you have the assurance of your dad if anything goes wrong in your life, or if you don't win the tournament. But you should at least have another plan in life just in case you were to fail. What if you don't win the tournament? What will you do then? People are struggling every day to put food on the table of their family, unlike you, who wastes so much money on their clothes and makeup. What good would you do by looking good when your heart is so ugly?"
I pursed my lips and took in a sharp breath. I gritted my teeth. "Please leave, Dylan," I managed to say without stuttering. I wanted the earth to swallow at that moment so that I wouldn't have to listen to his hurtful words anymore.
"This is what I'm talking about. You don't even have the heart to listen to your flaws and try to amend them. You deem yourself to be perfect, but no one is perfect, neither are you. I'm full of flaws, so are you," Dyan derided and stood up from his hair.
Just as I thought he was about to leave, he stopped and added, "And just so you know, I lied about liking anything about you. Your eyes, they disgust me. Your chirpiness makes me think how many people's happiness you must have trampled on to be this happy. Your face, it reminds me of someone I don't want to remember. I don't like or will never like anything about a fickle person like you." With that, he walked out on me.
I pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear, lowering my head, and let a tear fall from my eye.
Indeed, words could be sharper than a knife. But the worst part was, everything Dylan said was true and he meant it. Each and every word. He uttered them with such disgust and hatred.
A person who has been living her life ignorant and being inconsistent would never be able to understand a complex person like Dylan. It was no wonder I couldn't comprehend what he used to say before.
Did he think I only had one plan and that was being a car racer? Well, he wasn't wrong, but no one before him told me it was a flawed plan.
No one told me not to live like this. No one gave me a reality check like this.