Chapter 78 - Father Dearest

*“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” ― C.S. Lewis*

***Neron***

Soft crackling from the torches nicked the tense air of my father’s prison. I ogled at the weapon at my knees, faint smudges of blood staining both the handle and the blade with miscellanies of its past victims. Lady Sanguine’s bleeding eyes scald at the top of my skull as she stands by, patiently, for me to act. Behind me, my father became silent, minus his ragged exhales through his broken nose.

Sounds of many echoed around me, but I have yet to breathe.

Rigid as a statue, the fatal promise the woman made to me replayed like a video-cassette in my mind, rewinding and replaying again and again. Exchange the life of my father for my freedom. Death for a life. Tearing my eyes from the blade, I encountered Lady Sanguine’s expectant grin as her arms squeezed the cotton from the fragile seams of her worn-out teddy bear.

Flames of darkness and destruction licked behind her glittering rubies with untamed desire for death. Each flame flared to a hushed, internal tune as they scorch what was once Kiya’s purity. The dominant heat of her hatred wrapped its tendrils around my throat and made work to tighten the airways vital for my life. Her mouth promised release, but her eyes promised death.

She has no intention of letting either of us survive.

Isn’t that why she has us here? Lady Sanguine could’ve easily finished my father off, but she went through the trouble of towing me along for the ride, toying with me like a puppet. I recalled her proclamation shortly before she brought here me.

This is all but a **game**. But the stakes were too high to ignore.

Lady Sanguine is torturing me.

“Why the sudden change in plans?” Dad questioned, annihilating the stifling silence between us three. “Too afraid to take me out yourself?”

“On the contrary, Jonathan.” She purred, running her hand through the bear’s pelt. “Your fate is sealed, whether or not I kill you. But it is up to your son to determine if he should be the one to take you out. Think of it as your parting gift before you die.”

“You’re beyond help.”

“I did ask you if I was crazy when I killed Tristan. Now, you have your answer.”

I was confident when I had planned to take my father away from Lady Sanguine, but now, I’m entombed between two impossibles. If I kill Dad, Kiya, when she comes back, won’t live with his death on her hands. However, will letting Lady Sanguine watch have the same effect? I picked up a chipper sigh as she started tapping her foot.

“**Neron**.” Onyx mind-linked. “**Do it**. **There is no other alternative**. **He’s lucky enough to die by your hands**.”

Is it? Dying by Osiris’ or Lady Sanguine’s hand is a fate worse than the death itself. They’ll make Dad suffer until he expels his last breath, Lady Sanguine especially. Dying by my hands is an act of mercy, better than being ripped apart.

But after what Dad has put us through, including the car crash that led to this, he doesn’t deserve it. Yet, I struggled to take the blade. A deep part of me didn’t want to let him go—terrified of walking through the world without a family. That part recognized the man my father used to be: doting whenever it came to Mom’s needs, loving with Nuria and me, and overall a man I looked up to and wanted to be.

The man Dad used to be crackled and decayed under what he is now. Love and appraisal were slayed under the hurt and pain he put me through. His declarations that I was nothing but a failure to him. I had forgot genuinity of his smiles at pack-unrelated things. He used to smile whenever I drew portraits of him…

My heart wouldn’t stop weeping.

Heels clacked, increasing in volume, and gentle fingers curled underneath my chin, pulling my head up. Lady Sanguine peered into my soul, but the faded sensations of the worn-out mate bond fizzled underneath her digits. Her touch, immersed in darkness, didn’t alter the real Kiya buried beneath it—the first I felt of her since the day she left my lands.

“Your father is not the type of man to only have one victim.” She murmured, her breath caressing my nose. “He hurt you too, didn’t he?”

I didn’t respond. She tutted and exhaled. “I remember a day where I was tidying a hallway near the Alpha office when I overheard yelling. He was screaming at you, wasn’t he? A few crashes here and there and you flew out from the doors, holding your face. I kept my head down, but anyone could see the red blossoming on your skin like a rose in a dying garden.”

That day was as fresh on my mind as when it first happened. Dad reprimanded me for my laziness and accused me for not caring enough about taking over the pack because I wasn’t following through with my lessons. I skipped lessons for a full week, and he was in one of his drunken rages. He called me a mistake and a stain to the memory of Mom and Nuria before slapping the crap out of me.

He overlooked the fact that day was the third anniversary of their deaths. I didn’t care about a fucking thing because I missed them too much. I couldn’t even visit their graves because Dad drunk so much afterward that I was petrified that he’d stopped breathing in his office. A sixteen-year-old boy struggling to shake his father awake as bottles upon bottles laid around him like discarded toys became a weekly event until Steven took over.

Dad had yet to respond.

I felt tears pool in from the corner of my eyes and Lady Sanguine took notice. Her crimson diamonds sparkled with delight as her hand drifted from my chin to cup my cheek, cradling me like a baby.

“I also recall you arguing with him the night before Tristan’s execution. How many times had your father reminded you are a failure? Useless? An idiot? Did you think you were the only one he said those things to?” I, shamefully, leaned into her touch as her thumb caressed the underside of my eye. “It is preposterous to defend a lousy excuse of a man like him, and that is why he must perish.”

“The nerve of you trying to seduce my son in front of me!” Dad snarled, tugging at his chains. My eyes floated to his face to see pale blues dilating with fury. “But I shouldn’t expect anything less from a killer.”

“Are you truly going to take that sordid belief to the grave, hmm?”

“Damn straight! You single-handedly ruined my life! If I knew Selene’s avatar was nothing more than a deranged home-wrecker, I would’ve snapped your neck at the first opportunity!” Dad thrashed against his chains like a ferocious beast, the song of his imprisonment playing sour, screeching tunes.

“Too bad you couldn’t.” She cackled, her caressing thumb holding a constant pace. “But you had many opportunities to execute me, although you let them pass you by. Why is that? Is it only because of my connection to Neron, or is there something else you’re not telling us?”

“I should’ve killed you.”

“And now, I’m a killer!” Lady Sanguine guffawed. “It all has come full circle!”

“Neron, listen to me.” The heat of his glare pulled my eyes to his. “Make the wrong decision, and you’ll live to regret it! If your mother and sister were alive, what would they think of you?! Can you stomach throwing away your only family for an unstable woman?!”

Fury boiled through my entire body, burning away the edges of my skepticism. A fierce headache throbbed in my skull as Dad’s well-known tactics of manipulation hooked themselves into my psyche. The nerve of him mentioning Mom and Nuria! I snarled, snatching my face away from Lady Sanguine’s dark touch. “Quiet! You always do this! I can’t make my damn choices without you guilt-tripping me to siding with you! Are you this blind to the truth when it is right in front of your damn eyes?!”

“The truth is, your mate is a goddamn menace!”

“The truth is, you’re a pompous man who can’t see that you’re the reason she and I suffered because I couldn’t do every fucking thing you wanted! What would Mom and Nuria say about YOU?!”

“Everything I did was to make you a strong Alpha! You needed discipline, and I taught you that! I taught you the family, and the pack come first! You can’t turn your back on your father!”

“My father died a long time ago.”

Dad gawked at me, aghast with his jaw hanging open. Bronzed arms snaked themselves around my torso, pressing my back to a cushioned front. The dark energy emanating from the touch made me lightheaded and dizzy, sinking into my skin like a lethal poison. A head rests on my back with soft lips pressed over the fabric right where my pack mark is, waiting and demanding. I involuntarily shivered under Lady Sanguine’s touch, but the only saving grace was I feel Kiya’s pure energy lingering underneath.

“You’d do anything for me, right?” Lady Sanguine’s syrupy voice slithered into my ears as her fingers fluttered around my chest. “Isn’t that what mates do? You failed me before, so it is now your chance to make things right, Neron.”

Yes, I have failed her. Failure chipped away at my heart as my father’s years of belittling I’ve buried for the sake of peace. Dad growled in front of me, eyes focused on my every move. I have yet to pick up the blade resting underneath my knees, but my fingers ached to take it.

To end this once and for all.

“It is not all bad, Neron. Underneath all that nastiness inside your father is love.” She continued, her cheek on my back. “Your father destroyed me because he loved Celeste and Nuria. He loved you. He hurt you because he ‘loved’ you. However, he ruined you just as he ruined me. The only difference is that I’m doing something about it.”

“I didn’t want you to sink into the same darkness I had.” I confessed.

“Oh, this was a long time coming. Karma came back to kick ass, or in my case, kill.”

I could’ve prevented this if I only was strong enough to defend Kiya. If Uncle Zain hadn’t come to kill Mom and Nuria. If Dad was still the loving man, I faintly remember. But, no matter how I spin the scenarios, it all comes back to one ending.

This is just my fault as it is my Dad’s. He started the fire, and I roused the flames.

“I’m so sorry…”

“Show it.” Lady Sanguine stated, digging her nails into my skin. A soft, anguished groan escaped my lips, underestimating how sharp her nails were. “Rid the world of the man who ruined us. Unless you were lying to me all this time, like you’re lying about your regret?”

“I never lied. Ever.” I shot back. “I regret everything I’ve done to you, Kiya.”

“*Lady Sanguine*.”

“Same difference. You’re still her.”

“Maybe, maybe not. But I don’t like being kept waiting, Alpha. Kill him or I will.”

“Then, release me.” My voice came out harsher than intended, but at this point, the constant fucking around with my emotions between Dad and Lady Sanguine had pissed me off. Neither trust me to follow through with my intentions. Lady Sanguine was expected. But from Dad? I’ve been too afraid to admit this to myself with full conviction, despite Onyx settling with his opinions.

Siding with Dad had always been the safest and easiest option. My family was broken, and I didn’t want to break it further. I kept silent about his actions toward me and the monster lingering underneath them morphed itself in a way that his actions became justified. I wanted his laughs, not his anger. But no matter what I do, he’ll never love me at full capacity.

Love, from him, had become conditional overtime.

I’m tired of walking on eggshells as a grown-ass man. I’ve made my decision.

I felt a smile from Lady Sanguine on my back before she pulled away, backing off to her corner with her toy. This is between father and son. Dad took one last look at me and shook his head, puffing out a breath of pure revulsion. He knew my decision before I said it. The weight of the blade in my hands was light, the tip gleaming off the light of the torches. I took one last look at Dad, the image of his loving self before tragedy struck fading into ash.

If Mom and Nuria were still here, would’ve I still have had the old Dad? They could’ve saved him. Dad’s heart wouldn’t have blackened from their loss. I’ve failed him just as I failed Kiya.

Will I regret my choice? There was only one way to find out.

“You will regret your decision, son.” The jail walls sent back a reverting echo at my Dad’s declaration. His eyes held nothing but disappointment for me. I tried to search for the love he had for me, but I couldn’t find it. I’ll never find it. “May our Moon Goddess have mercy on your lonely heart. Kiya will never love you.”

Maybe, she never will. Dad's final words killed any last hope I had for love. Well deserved, I suppose.

“I’m okay with that.”

It was quick. Undeserving, but quick. I’ve met with Mom and Nuria, and Dad must answer to them about his crimes. The pale blue in his eyes dulled to lifeless grey as my trembling hands thrusted the blade into his heart. His final sound Dad will ever make on this blue earth was a shocked gasp. His corpse slumped forward, and his blood seeped through my fingers like a hellish waterfall.

I ended my father’s cruelty. I ended every possibility of him hurting anyone else in the future.

But my heart twisted deep sorrow. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn't make a sound. My entire family, officially, was gone. Onyx offered me his warmth, but it did nothing to stop the raging rivers dripping down my cheeks while I stared at Dad’s body.

‘*You’ll always be a failure*.’

Even in death, his words still rung powerfully.

“Impressive. I didn’t think you’d follow through. You just sentenced your father to death.”

Suddenly, scalding pain slashed through my right shoulder blade, punching all the air out of my lungs. Hot liquid gushed down my back with reckless abandon, burning at the faint breeze brushing over the naked wound on the cut fabric. Gasping in pain, I brought my unsteady hand to the wound, blood staining my entire hand.

I slowly turn my head to see Lady Sanguine, towering over me with an unbelievable amount of glee scorching her eyes. My soul shook in infinite fear under her crazed look, flaring red eyes and a sinister grin piercing into my own.

In her hands, she clutched her knife, the blade dripping with my blood.

“*And I, hereby, sentence you to death.*"