Chapter 50

Lug Nut


And I’m not just saying it to make her feel better. I would do anything for Ailee. “ I need you to have a good life. I need you to be happy. I need you to find love again.” My stomach drops, not liking the way she is talking. Like she is saying good-bye. This can’t be good-bye. I haven’t had enough time. “ Ailee, I don’t need to love again. I have you. I will always love you. I don’t need anything else. Just you.” I told her. Ailee looks over at the heart monitor and I notice the numbers have gone down. Not by much, just a couple of points. “ Travis.” Ailee gasps and I see the numbers drop more. “ Please promise me. Just be happy.” Ailee whispers. “ I'm happy with you.” I told her. The monitor starts beeping louder. “ I’ll always be with you.” Ailee says just before she passes out. “ Yes, you will. Stay with me Ailee. You can’t leave me.” I beg.

The monitor starts blaring and flashing red. “ No, no. Ailee!” Before I can blink I’m being yanked out of the way by Graves. “ No, I’m not leaving her.” I yelled at him. “ Let us work. Go outside Lug.Let me save her.” Graves said as he pushed me out the door. I yank off my gear and throw it in the bin. I watch Graves and the nurses the whole time I walk over to Cormac. He has his hand on the glass like he is reaching out to Ailee. I must have forgotten to turn the intercom off because I can hear everything that is going on in Ailee’s room. Graves is barking orders, having the nurses hand him different things. I can hear the monitor screaming that something is wrong. Finn is off to the side looking up at the ceiling mumbling something that sounds like a prayer.

Minutes have passed and Graves is still doing something to Ailee. I hear the monitor go from beeping contestant to one long beep. Graves shouts “ Flatline. Cardiac arrest. Get the paddles. Starting C.P. R.” I see one nurse grab a rolling cart and the other putting a different kind of mask over Ailee’s face. I see Graves pushing on Ailee’s chest. When the nurse gets the cart near she hands what looks like two irons to Graves. “ Charge.” he yells. The nurse nods as Graves puts the irons to Ailee’s chest. “ Clear.” he yells. The nurses step back and then Ailee’s lifeless body jumps off the bed. I lost it. I start pounding on the glass. I’m screaming her name over and over. “ No! Ailee, fight. Don’t leave me.” I see Ailee’s body jump off the bed again and I’m bawling my eyes out. I hear Graves yell “ Come on, Ailee. You are stronger than this.”

I pound on the glass some more not caring if I break it. I don’t care if those around me think I have lost my mind. I have lost it and my heart is breaking into a million pieces. “ Honey, please. Come back to me!” I shout. I don’t know how long this goes on. An eternity it feels like. I have stopped yelling because my throat is getting sore. I keep my hand on the glass and have my eyes on Ailee. I notice Graves step back and look at the monitor. What is he stopping? No he can’t stop. He has to bring her back to me. “ Come on Ailee. That’s it.” Graves said. I’m about to band on the glass again to tell him to get back to work when I hear it. Beep. Beep. Beep. The heart monitor. I look up and see it is no longer flashing. Beep. Beep.Beep. Beep. “ That’s it. Keep fighting.” Graves said. Beep. Beep. Graves looks over at Ailee then back to the monitor and smiles. “ Normal rhythm,” he said.

Graves and the nurses do a few more things, I don’t know what. My focus is on Ailee. I can see the gentle rise of her chest. I can feel my heart begin to mend. I can breathe a little easier now. Graves comes out and we all turn to him. I want answers. I want to know what happened. “ You called me just in time, Finn.” Graves said. I look over at Finn wanting an explanation. He looks over at me “ I noticed the monitor. And when Ailee talked to you and Cormac I knew something was wrong.” “ She was saying bye. Wasn’t she?” I asked. Cormac looks at me and nods. “ Aye, Lug. She was. Ailee knew what was happening. She was saying good-bye incase Graves couldn’t revive her.” I turn to Graves “ What happened to Ailee? Why did her heart stop?”

“ Lug, Ailee’s body is very weak. You know that. The radiation killed her bone marrow like it was supposed to but it also did some damage to her organs. Mainly her heart and kidneys. Today it was just too much and her heart just gave out.” Graves said. “ But you got it started again. You brought Ailee back.” I said. “ I did. But Ailee is far from out of the woods yet. I have given her some medicine to help her heart. Once the transplant is done I will do more extensive testing to see exactly how much damage has been done to her heart. We will go from there.” Graves said. I look at Ailee then back to Graves. Something is bothering me. “ Graves, had we done the transplant a few months ago, would this still happen?” I asked.

“ It is hard to know for sure. But had it been done when Ailee was a lot stronger I believe she wouldn’t be struggling like she is now.” Graves said. That’s all I needed to know. I turn to Cormac “ There is something I have to do. Tell Ailee not to go anywhere. I’ll be right back.” Cormac nods and gives me a smirk like he knows what I’m fixing to do. I turn back to the glass,place my hand on it and whisper “ Don’t you leave me again. I love you and I’ll be back soon.” Then I’m out the door to the clubhouse. I have someone I need to see.

I quickly park my bike and run inside the club. Once in the main room I scan for who I’m looking for. I see Ace sitting at the table in the back talking and laughing with Thor. I charge over there and punch in his smiling face as hard as I can. I punched him so hard I knocked him and his chair over. When he is on his back I jump on him, grab him by the collar and punch him again. I do this over and over. The face, his ribs, his gut. “ You son of bitch. You selfish prick. You almost killed her.” I yelled as I punched.

I fell hands on me pulling me off Ace and I struggled against them. I’m on my feet trying to get to Ace again. He needs to feel some of my pain. He needs to know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out. Arms wrap around me keeping my arms down. Hands on my shoulders holding me in place. “ Lug, stop. What the hell?” Viper yells from behind me. It must be the hands on my shoulders. “ He needs to hurt for what he did.” I yell. “ Lug calm down. What did Ace do?” Viper asks.

I stay still and look dead at Ace. Goof has helped him stand up and has given him a towel for his face that is covered in blood. Good. He deserves worse. “ Lug, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Ace asks. “ You want to know what is wrong with me. You are what is wrong with me. If you would have done the transplant earlier Ailee would be having such a hard time right now. But no you had to be a dick.” I growl at him. “ What are you talking about? Did something happen to Ailee?” Ace asks. “ Like you give a shit. You haven't seen her once since she forgave you.” I told him. “ I do care about Ailee. She is my daughter.” Ace said. I just laugh in his face. I feel a small hand on my arm. I turn my head and see Anna. “ Lug, tell me what happened to Ailee. And what does Ace have to do with it?”

I turn back to Ace as I relive the scariest moment of my life. “ I had to listen to Ailee trying to tell me goodbye. I had to be pushed out of the room by Graves. I had to watch the love of my life heart stop.” I feel the tears run down my face but I don’t care. Let him see how fucked up I am after having to watch that. “ I had to watch Graves pound on her chest as they did C.P.R. I was screaming at Ailee begging her not to leave me as her body flopped off the bed when Graves shocked her to try getting her heart to start.” I hear sobbing from all around me as I tell my story. “ Lug, is Ailee?” Anna can’t finish as she cries harder. Not that I blame her. “ Not Anna. Graves got her heart started again.”

I look Ace in the eyes to say this last part. “ Graves said Ailee’s heart was damaged due to the radiation. But you want to know what else he said. He said if the transplant had been done months ago. Like when Ailee first came to you. Her body wouldn’t be having such a hard time. If it had been done when she was strong she might not be having these problems. So Ace, my Ailee’s heart stopping is on you. My heart was torn to shreds watching her go through that. It is on you.” I say. Ace looks like he is going to collapse. Good. I shake off Viper and Thor. “ I’m good. I’m going back to my girl. She needs me more than this piece of shit.” I say and walk out.