~ Chapter Fifty ~

If I thought round two had left me tingling, I had another thing coming. I lay next to Dimitri for probably about an hour trying to recover from the past who-knew-how-long of strenuous activity. I still wasn’t quite there when, for the first time, I received a mind-link sent to everyone who lived with us that dinner was done from Xanthe.

Dimitri glanced over at me as if he knew what I was thinking, a small smile on his face. My eyes locked on his lips and I had to fight not to push for a round four, considering I wasn’t sure I would even be able to stand now, let alone in another hour. I forced my gaze away and slid off of the bed, testing my feet before I began to pull on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

Arms wrapped around me from behind, lips pressing to the tender mark on my neck. I leaned back and nuzzled my head against Dimitri’s. We felt so much closer now, our bond so much stronger. I never thought it would make me feel this way, though I was acutely aware that these weren’t my feelings, they were forced upon me. I didn’t entirely mind, it was just lingering in my head.

“Dinner,” I muttered, pulling myself out of Dimitri’s embrace. He sighed but followed me out of our room dressed in black sweats and a white long-sleeved shirt that outlined his thick arms better than anything else he’d worn. Something else I had to keep looking away from.

The moment we entered the kitchen, Jess looked up, her mouth open like she was about to say something, but she snapped her jaw back into place and widened her eyes instead. She’d stopped dead in her tracks on the way to sit down, blocking Dylan, who started to complain when he saw her face. He saw us instantly.

“Well, well,” he mused, crossing his arms as he tilted his head to the side. “Do tell, what have you two been busy doing all this time? You left training ages ago.”

I cast him a glare when everyone else finally noticed us, their eyes locking below our faces.

“Well, Luna?” he teased.

I sighed. “I don’t think you could handle the details.”

“Really?” He looked at Dimitri, his entire face lit up with excitement. “I’m sure if you won’t give them to me, he will.”

Dimitri rolled his eyes and sat down. Xanthe, the only person not obsessed with our necks, simply handed him a plate and put one down next to him. I slid into the seat quickly.

Jess, finally recovered from her own shock, looked at Dylan with disdain. “Maybe they just don’t want to tell the entire room about how they went upstairs in shitty moods and apparently fucked for hours.”

“Jessica,” Dimitri snapped.

She smiled. “Yes, Alpha?” Her eyes drifted to me. “Luna?”

Dylan had already called me that, but it was different from her. Dimitri’s beta calling me her luna was a completely separate concept. By the way her smug smile shifted into a more gentle grin, I had a feeling she really did see me that way. It was jarring, after everything, to be recognised as such.

I turned my attention away from my racing thoughts toward what I’d been puzzling over while recovering earlier. I’d thought a lot about my past, my present and what I wanted for my future. There was so much I had to improve on, so many changes I needed to make.

At the end of the day, no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to escape my title. Those two letters I legally could use before my name that marked me as someone capable of helping others; someone this pack needed and had been unable to find despite searching. When I was right under their noses, the only thing stopping me from taking on that role was my own stubbornness to escape my past. It seemed ridiculous now. I stood up for myself - that much, I would never apologise for - and in doing so, I only made myself seem more impatient and unreasonable.

To help people in a pack I actually liked was worth thinking about my past once in a while. This pack deserved to have someone qualified who cared about them to look after them when they got hurt, and that was what I would do - but on the side from whatever responsibilities Dimitri would put on me as luna.

I found Xanthe’s gaze once she had sit down to join the rest of us. She noticed I wanted her attention and smiled softly at me, speaking into the mind-link. *‘Everything okay?’*

‘*Yeah,*’ I replied, *‘I was just wondering how Valerie and her kids are doing.’*

*‘They’ve been spending most of their time alone. I think they’re all terrified for Valerie’s mate and her other son, I’ve heard a bit of crying a few times. But I am sure all will be well eventually.’*

I didn’t tell her the likelihood of Connor still being alive. If Roger knew all the ways he’d helped me, especially with Gina and since Dimitri showed up, the man would have been gutted on the spot. Not to mention, Roger would have decided to play some sadistic game with poor little Tony.

My heart ached for them.

*‘Has there been any success in the doctor search?’* I asked her, desperate to escape my despair at my own actions. Xanthe just barely shook her head. *‘Don’t worry about looking any more. I’ll take on the responsibility but on the side. If anyone is badly injured, then I will aid them. For anything little like illnesses, do you think you can keep handling it?’ *

*‘Of course,’* Xanthe chirped, straightening her back as she grinned across the countertop at me. *‘What changed your mind?’*

I tried not to react too visibly, though Dylan seemed to glance in my direction for a moment. *‘I think I finally realised how selfish I’m actually being by keeping my qualifications to myself. You know you can trust me, so bringing someone outside in to look after our pack doesn’t sit right with me. Not anymore.’*

*‘I think that’s the right thing to do, Luna.’*

I flinched and Dimitri looked at me. He instantly saw the expression on my face, frowning as his hand landed on my thigh. I ran my thumb across his knuckles, staring down at my lap. “Don’t worry about it,” I muttered to him. Xanthe didn't expose what was on my mind, so I continued to act casual as I ate dinner.

Even with the pack I had grown up in, I'd never felt the dormant connection deep down that I felt sitting in the kitchen with Dimitri's pack. Just barely, I could sense the bond between each of us, the strongest of course being to the man sitting next to me. My neck was still tender and my body was exhausted from all the activity we'd taken part in today, not to mention the emotional rollar coaster that never seemed to end; however, beneath all that was a feeling of purpose. I felt I actually belonged here for the first time ever.

If I'd known sex was the easiest way to make that happen, I would have given into Dimitri a long time ago.